Is it unusual to choose a name outside your heritage?

[Zarry]

Do you think it's common to use a name that's not of your (or your spouse's) heritage? I'm currently eyeing a very beautiful Italian name for DC. We don't have any connection to Italy, but that hasn't stopped me loving the name. Our surname is Irish, but we live in England. I have worried if extremely Italian first name + extremely Irish surname (think something similar to Giovanni O'Brien or Alessandra McCarthy) would sound like something out of an odd comedy to others. Then there will surely be the inevitable questions about why we've gone with this name.

Maybe I'm overthinking (which I tend to do with decisions). Just looking to see what the general consensus is.

I dont see it as a big deal at all. I have a non British name (with no heritage to it) and so far it has been "claimed" by people I have met from India, Sweden and Spain. It cant actually be originally from all three places so I dont see the big deal personally.

I like having a non boring typical British name 😏

I have a non British name that is no longer really used in its country of origin. It's got a massive backstory that involves fighting in wars/liberating villages/multi generational saga within my family, but sometimes I cant be bothered to explain the whole story so I say "just random" ha. People often try to argue that it's Irish (as it sounds similar to an Irish name) so I sometimes just agree with that too 🤣

dd has a name that's technically Italian but used by Brits for a long time snd nobody asks. Plus we are in london.

I don’t see anything wrong with it. Only people on MN seem to give a shit about such things. I’m Turkish and have a Greek name and my brother and sister have a Scottish and a Russian name, no one has ever asked us about it.

But if she didn’t have Italian heritage, would you really care? Why does it matter?

Exactly and I have never once met someone in real life and interrogated them on their name and where it comes from and asked them if they have a "right" to use it - that actually sounds quite racist, frankly.

Along the lines of "no, where are you REALLY from?"

But why does this matter? you arent going to instantly know the intricate details of anyone's family heritage on meeting them for the first time so why the need to know this in order to feel comfortable talking to them?

It doesn't but I'd wonder why they used a spelling that would get misspelt a lot in the UK. I don't know any Giuliettas but the Giulia I know say that she finds sone people don't know how to say her name. A Giorgio I work with gets his name written as Gorgio a lot.

If you heard the name Julia Smith, would it even cross your mind that it was Giulia Smith?

My friend's name is constantly misspelt and hers is British.

Mine is and it's not even complicated.

Yes it's very frustrating!

I don't find it frustrating but it seems a bit insulting.

Like 'Dear Statoin, ' - great you can't be arsed to get my name right.

I think you have to share the name

@wishingonastar101 , mine is something like Dawn Norris and I get Dwan Morris or Dan Noriss type errors.

Same. I'm of Anglo and Russian origin and my name is French. DH is as English as they come and his name is named after his mother's first Greek husband who died tragically young (his father was happy to honour that which i think is rather special).

DH and I are English and our son has a Scandinavian name, daughter's is I believe greek originally (but a very popular UK name now). My surname sounds Spanish so I got asked all the time when I was younger if I'm Spanish and can honestly say it never bothered me!

Bring stuck inside your own heritage is so limiting...of course you can use an Italian name. Wonderful idea.

I would have thought that too! But hearing it on the football commentary, it sounded surprisingly nice.

I have a European middle name, and was named after my parents friends. I’ve loved having something unusual, and no one has thought it was odd.

I think it depends on the name and the spelling. If the name is spelt and sounds like how it’s spelt, you may be fine. If it’s an unusual spelling or difficult name to pronounce, then maybe not.

Out of the two names you gave, I think Giovanni is maybe to Italian, but Alessandra would be fine. I know a couple whose daughter has the name Florentina, which I think is gorgeous, and also came across a baby Lorenzo recently.

Dd has an Italian name but also a lot of Italian heritage and an Italian surname (via DH). I actually loved Irish names when choosing but thought it would be strange as we have no Irish links (apart from a five times great grandfather)

Could you find an obscure Irish name? Or other Celtic name? So many lovely ones

It’s not about the spelling for me, so much as the pronunciation. Since you aren’t Italian, I just think it’s naff and wanders a bit into cultural appropriation for me.

If you're asking if it would be cultural appropriation, I feel like most of the cultural appropriation talk about names comes from people who are American(ised). Sure, it would be weird for a non-Pakistani couple to name their child an Urdu (for example) name, but what really can be done about it? If someone wants to name their child something in the UK, they're able to with very few restrictions. Why even talk about something that cannot be stopped? There are many names that I think parents are incredibly daft for using, but I wouldn't want someone policing my personal naming decisions, so I will not police others'. If the child hates their name, they have the right to change it.

The problem I have with cultural appropriation and names is that most traditional Christian names are either Greek or Hebrew anyway.

But this is the point - how would you know its cultural appropriation without asking the person about their family tree?

You cant tell someone is half Italian or a quarter French or whatever just by the way they look. This begs the question- do you ask people about their names and how they got them/why they were called that? because if so, to me, that is racist in itself.

Regarding cultural appropriation, I really doubt the average Italian cares about what some foreign couple living thousands of miles away name their children. Just saying. I doubt people of Italian descent living in the UK would be particularly bothered about it either.

"Cultural appropriation refers to the act of adopting elements from one culture by members of another, particularly when a dominant group appropriates aspects of a marginalized culture in a manner that is seen as disrespectful or exploitative."

I don't really see how this concept applies to names, unless you are claiming Giovanni isn't really an Italian name and you invented it yourself, or you're trying to make money off the back of Italian culture while not being Italian (Jamie Oliver?) or falsely using an Italian name to intentionally misrepresent yourself as Italian or something like that. None of those seem to be the case here.

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