Is it ever okay to reuse a middle name?

[FireHorse29]

I'm around 32ish weeks pregnant with very few solid options for our second baby girl. There's a lot of names we kind of "like", but not really enough to commit to using... This is 99.9% our last child, so it would be nice to use something we both love. Here's the issue: a name that we really do love is May, which is also our first daughter's 2nd middle name.

I am normally the first person to dislike reusing names - in fact, I remember (hypocritically now) complaining about it when Prince Louis got one of George's middle names as a first. However I do feel like there are some circumstances in our case that might make it "more" useable.

1. May was my grandma's name, so it holds a special meaning to my whole family. I was really close to her and she passed away when I was young. She has 7 great-granddaughters now from her many grandchildren, and all of these 7 happen to have at least one name that honours her. So, in a way, I feel like this child would be the only one left out if we DIDN'T call her something that ties to my grandma. Also, as my first daughter already shares this name with other family members, it doesn't feel as much like I'm "taking" it away from her.

1. Because it's my older daughter's second middle name, she still has two other names that are completely hers. This baby will also have two names that are completely hers as well. So, it's not quite as samey as it could be.

1. To make matters a little more confusing, this baby will end up being called Mei, at least by her big sister anyway, as we are a mixed family and that is how you call your little sister in my OH's culture. So, we kind of thought calling her May in English as well is a nice tie in to that side of the family.

We have toyed with the idea of using a name that can be shortened to May or honours my grandma in another way - my favourite is actually Mavis, but this has not been well received by anyone I've mentioned it to 😬 I'm kind of over Mabel; in our area, it seems like every other girl has this name. Maisie is my little girl's nursery teacher which doesn't seem like a massive deal but just feels a little weird. I do really love the simplicity of just May... What are your thoughts??

I think it’s absolutely fine to use it as one of her names - all good reasons

If you did want a name you could shorten to May - here are a lot! Some may mean different things in your OH’s culture so link to full list here!
https://www.babycenter.com/baby-names/search/girl-baby-names-starts-with-may

It’s fine - I gave ds1 my Dad’s name as his second name. When I had ds2, my Dad had just died, and we named ds2 after him. It’s allowed!

Of course it’s okay, I’m not why sure you would think not. There’s a load of ‘’’ Mary’s” in our family, some first name ,some middle name, amongst siblings and cousins. They are collectively called the ‘‘Mary’s’’’

Maeve?

Both my DSs have the same middle name. No one cares 🤣

Spell it Mae?

A friend has 2 DSs with the same middle name

DS’s middle name is very common indeed in DH’s large family, there are absolutely loads of them. He has over 35 first cousins, he thinks, but has in fact lost count.

(There are a fair few with the same first name as DS too.)

You can definitely do it intentionally and make it a 'family' naming tradition - they may even keep it up if they have DDs.

My grandmother's family, Spanish, all the women had Maria as there middle name for 3 generations. Every one of them

I think it's nice!

Definitely. My best mate has given the same middle name to both her sons. It's her family name. It's not like you'd get confusion unless they both coincidentally decided they'd prefer to use middle as first name. Which would be their choice so clearly they'd be fine with it.

I have the same middle name as my sisters

It's always May or Rose and always 'my Nan's name'.

It's absolutely no problem in my view. And May is lovely as a first name! You have good reasons for choosing it, number 1 being you love it.

It’s fine, my DM, DSis DGM and all share a middle name.

Just use it. All the girls in husbands family have the same middle name they all survived into adulthood without any trauma or confusion

Sorry, the quotation marks really tickled me - I mean, it was my grandmother's name? Can't ask her to change it unfortunately as she's selfishly popped her clogs about 2 decades ago.

Thank you so much to everyone who's replied, given suggestions and personal anecdotes or shared their thoughts. To answer why I thought it may not be okay - looking at the previous threads on this topic, the majority view seemed to be that it may cause resentment between siblings, e.g. they might feel like they are getting castoffs or not as special and I do understand that point of view as well.

It's totally fine OP. There are only so many names you like and May is so pretty. Harry Kane's daughters both have the middle name Jane which I used to think was odd but it's a family name apparently. So with that and Prince Louis you are in good company!

My DM and my DGMs middle names were May, born in 1912 and 1937, lots of the girls in our family have May as their middle name
DH has middle name James again used for many generations in his family as a middle name.

My dad's younger brother had my dad's middle name as his first name. Like Louis in the RF, it was a family name.

I suppose when they were naming Prince George they didn't know if they would have another son to give the name Louis to, and same with my dad and uncle.

Amaya
Amayah
Mayleen
Mayson
Samaya

My grandma had 7 siblings, male and female, and they all had the same middle name.

@FireHorse29 , mine too, and the other nan was Rose, MIL and DM are both Grace.

The DDs are called Rose May Grace, May Grace Rose and Grace Rose May.

I know a Mabel who gets called May.

It’s fine. My cousin nicked my name… if anything it made us closer