Baby name regret?

[amy480]

Recently had a baby girl (we didn’t know the gender) and I struggled to decide on a name (I’m naturally quite indecisive). I had 2 names in mind but when she was born my husband said she wasn’t either of those names which made the doubt set in. I also asked the opinions of close family and got negative feedback on the name I liked (Imogen). In the end we have gone for a popular name (Ava) which I have always liked but wasn’t a front runner until she was here. I now keep dwelling on the name Imogen and wondered if I should have pushed more?! Anyone else had this. For what it’s worth I do think Ava is a very pretty name and suitable for all ages (didn’t want anything too cutesy) I’m just concerned it is too popular and Imogen a bit more unique. Name choices are so hard and such a responsibility!!

If it helps, I’m a teacher and have taught my share of Avas and Eves etc.

Each one is an individual in my mind. They are all different people with their own strengths and interests.

The only reason I might “lump then together” would be when trying to recall everyone’s names off the top of my head!

I had quite intense baby name regret - I think it's a post partum thing. I'd spent months thinking of names (for twins), my husband hardly engaged, then came into the hospital with a name for our daughter that I hadn't considered plus MIL and UNCLE in law (I mean why tf did I take any notice?!!) both said 'as long as it's not a nickname' which sent me into a tizzy as I'd always liked Bella which was my granny's name but didn't really like Isabel. I also worried it was too popular but I haven't actually encountered any Bellas so things obviously move on over a decade (you might find that Ava is not that common in your daughter's cohort). We went with my husband's choice in the end and she definitely did grow into it - it's quite glam and unusual - but I think if I had my time again I'd have pushed back more firmly and stopped trying to please everyone. It's such a vulnerable time in hindsight. But in the end they do grow into their names - and they are who they are regardless!!! That said my cousin renamed their son when he was about a year old and everyone readjusted - so do what's right for you and your partner and forget everyone else!

I felt this a little after DD1 - I’m also really indecisive, and we went with a name I liked rather than loved (because I couldn’t think of one I truly loved!). It’s grown on me more now than when we first decided on it because it’s hers now, I feel it suits her, and it’s fairly “safe”, which I think is good! She’s not been saddled.

However, there was another name that I also really liked that I thought about sometimes afterwards, for a good couple of years on and off - not quite regret, but a sort of wistfulness? Like maybe I liked that name more.

This ended up being DD2’s name, as I took that as a sign that I really did love it!

I think there’s a lot of narrative (and pressure!) around finding the perfect name for a baby, and loving it, and it being “the one”. Many people don’t have that - it’s about finding a solid name that a little one can grow into, that won’t hold them back in life. You’ve done that 💐

Both Ava and Imogen are lovely names.

Both are fine. Why not use them as first and second names?

But then what do I know? I’m only a bloke, and one who wanted Antimony, or Oberon, but after the wife’s veto ended up with James.😀