Name changes

[Weaselfoxandbadger]

I'd love to add in an extra middle name for my two children. They already have a middle name each but I'd love for them to have a flower name each as I think it could be better alternative for them if they don't like their names when they're older. If I did this how much would it really impact them in the future re. Forms.
Do you think it's an acceptable or absurd thing to do?
Children are 2.5 and 5
Thanks

Not sure I’d personally want to pay £50 each to just add an extra name. I can’t really see any benefits to them (after all they could start using a flower name / other nickname for common use regardless of if it is a legal middle name) and maybe some small potential downsides re: forms as you say. But if you feel very strongly, I wouldn’t go as far as calling it absurd!

Just add a middle name unofficially. No deed poll.

Forms tend to ask 'Name at birth:
If different, please attach proof of name change'

Every time the birth certificate is needed, they would also need to supply the deed poll.

It might be more of a hassle than a benefit to them when they’re older, as if they’re over 12 months, doesn’t it need to be declared when they fill in forms etc throughout life? I don’t think I’d do it personally.

Yes. I don't want to sound a twat but the money wouldn't bother me.
You know sometimes people, as they get order, decide to go by a middle name because it feels better for them? I'd rather it be official than a made up one. Their first names don't have any nickname options as some do.

How do you do it unofficially though? Just tell them they have a new name but they don't really?
Ok so they need to supply deed poll with birth certificate. That is a bit annoying. At the same time, I, as an adult don't know where my birth certificate is and can't remember when I needed it last? I obviously can't remember what forms the name change thing need to be mentioned as it's never applied to me before. Do you know which type of forms and how often they crop up?

Bit pointless imo

dh and i agonised over middle names but the truth is they really don’t matter at all. Almost pointless IMO! I hate mine and would never ever use it

Yes it doe need to be declared but I'm not sure these forms crop up that often?

I’m not sure whether things like passports, driving licences, mortgage applications, claiming benefits etc… would need that information? Sorry I’m not more help!

You can’t add middle names onto their birth certificates now, they are too old. The only thing you can do is add them via deed poll. The previous poster was correct though, they will always have to show both forms when confirming their ID.
Personally I wouldn’t bother.
If they dislike their names that much, they can change them by deedpoll themselves once they are adults.
I don’t think it’s fair for parents to do this to their children, it’s the children who have to mess about explaining why their names are different to all officials.

Let them do it themselves if they are unhappy later in life.

Can you call them an unofficial flower nick name attached to their first name?

Your children might prefer to choose their own offical name and whether the extra hassle of extra forms is actually worth it when they are adults.
Do you like reading Cicely Mary Barkers' Flower Fairies series of books?

@Moreteaandchocolate , They come up fairly regularly if you need DBS clearance.

Your DC (presumably DD) already have a middle name, so could always use that if they don't like their first name. If they don't, they might want to choose their own name.

You would be doing it for you, not them.

OP, I had a name change as a child and I find it a pain in terms of paperwork.
I have to declare it so often for forms, DBS checks, job applications/screening. If your DC go into a career where screening/DBS checks etc are required, they will not enjoy the extra admin it involves.

How do you do it unofficially though? Just tell them they have a new name but they don't really?
I don't think I would but I can think of people who use a middle name that's not on their birth certificate.

Ok so they need to supply deed poll with birth certificate. That is a bit annoying. At the same time, I, as an adult don't know where my birth certificate is and can't remember when I needed it last? I obviously can't remember what forms the name change thing need to be mentioned as it's never applied to me before. Do you know which type of forms and how often they crop up?
Job applications for any regulated organisations e.g. civil service, military, financial institutions
Security Clearance
DBS clearance

Absurd is too strong of a word, but I don't think it's a reasonable thing to do. They'd have to add it onto forms as a name change, and I just think it looks a little silly for no reason.

I don't think it's a reasonable thing to do. They'd have to add it onto forms as a name change, and I just think it looks a little silly for no reason.

This. If it was a family name (e.g. adding the mother's maiden name, or because the full name was duplicated at school) it might be justifiable, but adding a flower name for the sake of it seems pointless.

Completely agree with this. I have two middle names and had a change to my first name and my second middle name as a child.

Going through security screening and DBS checks for a Civil Service job was a total nightmare, the NHS had my name written down wrong and so my Covid pass thing never worked when that was (briefly) a thing, my former name on my marriage certificate is wrong because I didn't even know about the second middle name change when I went to the registry office, and when I got a passport from another country it literally took more than five years and lots of time and money to get my changed name onto this new country's records properly and get a valid passport in it.

OP, your children might not thank you for this. Can you just start calling them the flower nicknames? They can change their names formally as adults if they want to, but this honestly might be more hassle than it's worth.

Add them! People are so rigid about name changes (people are shocked and Surprised) and I have no idea why. You’re their parent, do what you like!

@Bridgetjonesheart , The change will be a PITA, and in this case it seems sexist. If OP had a DS, would she be adding a flower name as a middle name?

What's a PITA?

Your attitude is really refreshing. Thank you. The thing that worries me is the form business. Which other posters who have experienced this say is totally annoying! I don't want that for them.

@Weaselfoxandbadger , Pain In The Arse.

Ye a PITA. To be honest I think I have baby name regret. In different forms. Since the first. How do people not feel differently all the time about their kid names?
I would love to feel contented and as if I had chosen the perfect name which Ive loved forever etc. does everyone feel a little regret from time to time but just shake it off and move on? Or do most people just feel absolute.....

I would do what makes you all happy as a family. I have changed my surname and the form filling doesn’t bother me as I’d rather the amendment than the previous name so it’s fine by me. I appreciate some people have found it difficult with certain applications but honestly, I’ve had job applications more difficult than the ID/DBS checks and form filling. There will be much more complex things to do in life than the extra bit of admin. I’m sure it’ll be fine and once the names are changed and you have ID with those names on, the BC and deed poll will be rarely needed. Naming a human is a big responsibility, if you feel you want to change it to give them options, go for it. It’s completely your choice and decision and I’m sure they’d never wish you didn’t do it. They’re young enough to never really remember not having those middle names so that’s another plus x

@Weaselfoxandbadger i’m no expert but I seem to think many agencies are far less bothered by middle names. I can see why you’re giving it some thought though.