Rafe

[gollyimholly]

I love the name Rafe. But DH says it looks and sounds like "rape". I would never have associated it but now he's said it I'm wondering how others see it.

Is he right? 😭

'Ra*e' is precisely my thought before I opened the thread.

I didn’t think that. But it is a really overused name at the minute

It’s reasonably popular in our area so I’ve met a few and not once have I thought that…

How about Rafferty instead?

I always think “chafe”. Which is better, but not ideal. I prefer Ralph.

I agree with DH I’m afraid, and also with the pp who suggested Rafferty as a much nicer alternative.

Not at all! Great name I wanted it as a shortened version of Raphael but I was over ruled haha

It’s pronounced Rafe but spelt Ralph. Like Ralph Fiennes.

I loved it until I opened the thread and now I can’t unthink what your dh said.

What about Rafa?

I prefer it as a nn for Rafferty or Ralph.

I feel like if I spelt it Ralph, we'd forever be correcting the pronunciation - "no it's Rafe not Ralf"

I like it much more than Ralph (which always makes me think of vomiting) - but yes, sound wise it is pretty close to rape, sorry.

Surprising I do still like it and it’s very rapidly increasing in popularity, so in 10/20 years time people might not link the sound so much (the way less people link the popular name Jude with the word Jew anymore for example or Violet with Violent - it’s all about how many people you’ve met with the name imo to what instant association you get).

I’d also consider similar Ray though - very cool now in a retro/hipster Ray Charles sort of way and somehow less close to the rape sound, again maybe due to familiarity as there’s a good few Grandad’s about called Raymond and lots of Ray’s on US TV which tends to trickle down to the UK. Whereas until recently Rafe (or Ralph with that pronunciation) was rare “public school”/UC name territory only.

Too close to ra*e. I like Rafael.

I have a Rafe.

I say "Rafe like safe" to people when they question the pronunciation, so that's my first word association which is obviously much better than rape!

And yes, it can be spelled Ralph but we had the same thoughts as you OP. A lifetime of explanation avoided.

The phonetic spelling also has a very long-established use.

I like it, I didn't think of rape at all. I also wouldn't spell it Ralph that it me is absolutely Ralf

I agree with your husband - entire reason we didn’t give the name to any of our sons. My husband loved the name

I’m afraid DH may be right, that's what my brain automatically read til I clocked the subject and then re read

I think it’s gorgeous op. My first thought was Rafe Spall, always thought his name is lovely. Never once thought rape.

I like it! I didnt think of rape

Ah wow thanks everyone for your replies. It does seem a bit of a mixed bag...

I don't know any Rafes/Ralphs myself so at least it's not oversaturated where I am I guess.

I still like the name a lot but don't want future DC to be bullied or anything 😭

I knew a Raphael, always called Rafe, sadly no longer with us. Lovely name.

I’ve got to be honest, it only reminds me of bad things…
Ra*e, ‘chafe’ or ‘rife’

Mine too.

Honestly im sorry if this ruins the name further but medically the Raphe (pronounced like safe) is the line that runs down the penis. So spelling Rafe like Ralph makes it look even more like the medical term in my opinion. It's a nice name, but as someone who is medically trained this is all I associated it with, and it only takes one kid to pick up on it before your kid is teased for sharing a name with something penile.