Baby doesn’t feel like their name

[Heyprecious]

Help. My almost one year old - I just don’t feel like their name fits them? I can’t shake it

only problem is, I have already changed their name once which suggests it’s most likely/definitely a me problem? I darent tell anyone that I feel like this, but I do think I panicked and chose a name I wasn’t 100% on and I wish I’d given myself more time to think about. I think the hormones are getting to me.

anyone felt similar in the past then actually the name ended up being fine?

It can be hard to identify a baby with their name particularly if it's quite a grown up name like Elizabeth or Alexander for example.

It could be a case of ride it out and wait for it to feel more comfortable when dc is older.

But how are you feeling in yourself ? Mood? Bonding with baby? Anxiety? I would consider if a gp visit might help.

What is the name?

Baby is almost one...they know their own name. They recognise it. You may be feeling it's not their name, but they will already.

They have a name and identity. Thinking you can change it as this point feels like you don't seem them as an actual person. They're not a toy or an accessory.

They will become their name. Try to stop thinking about it and just enjoy who they are. Use lots of endearments and shortened versions but also their proper name, until it becomes just right.

Pls don’t change it again

I found it really hard to get used to my son's name too.
I have brown eyes and brown hair so I imagined my son would look like me with the dark features, however he's a gorgeous blonde with beautiful bright blue eyes and the name I'd picked out seemed like it suited the dark featured boy I was imagining and it just wasn't him.
He's only 4 months and I still think of names he'd suit more but my dh thinks the name we chose suits him perfectly so maybe he just doesn't look how I imagined someone with that name typically looks but soon when you get used to someone's name I'm sure you won't be able to imagine them called anything else.

I think that feeling is fairly commonplace because it’s so hard to make what seems like such a big decision for someone else- especially someone so important to us. But that’s just until your DC start referring to themselves by their name - that’s when it really becomes “their name” as it feels like they’ve accepted it themselves iykwim? If your DC is nearly 1, it won’t be that much longer to wait, despite what it feels like now (another 6 months to a year most likely).

They will definitely already recognise their name though, even though they can’t say it yet, so unless it’s something so terrible that it could cause major teasing (which is really unlikely these days with the wide variety of names!), I wouldn’t change it again.

Find a nickname you like and use that until they are a little older and suit their name more (or forever if you like, my mum calls me by a nickname). It can be a nickname related to their name or something completely random.

No baby looks like their name. Do you think there has ever been a baby that looks like a Susan or a Stephen or a Jacob or an Emma? They all just look like babies until you start to see them grow into little people.

I think your feelings are 100% completely normal! I wouldn't change the name again. I can guarantee that you will have chosen a perfectly lovely name.

And give yourself a break!

If you have any other signs of post natal depression definitely go speak to your GP. But if not it's very possible that you are putting pressure on yourself because you feels it's such a big decision. It is a big decision but as long as you have chosen a name that you think is nice, you have done a great job and literally can do no more than that.

At first I wasn’t a massive fan of the name we chose, but 2 years later I couldn’t see her as anything else

I agree with @SJay401 post.

What is the name?

She's nearly a year old. This is her name now. What is the name and are there nicknames?

People write this sort of response and yet I have no clue what on earth a Gp or health visitor could do except suggest talking about it, or go an antidepressant. I hate the way it’s written as if the Gp has some sort of magic wand. She’s asking on here for real feedback and suggestions from real people. Stop deflecting and just answer about the topic in question.

In a similar situation myself.interesting to read the replies. Would love to know how you are now.

Thank you, one of the few very decent, empathetic answers on here ❤️ I also see the “have you reached out to a GP?” Responses just incredibly condescending. So thank you for your level-headed one x

Hey, so sorry to hear you’re experiencing the same. I obviously really empathise with you. I’ve definitely become more on board with their name but don’t get me wrong I do still see some names and think how better suited they might be, but I know morally I can’t change it now so I’ve just had to roll with it. And time has helped!

how old is your LO? Xx

I appreciate this comment and viewpoint, thank you so much