Is it strange to give my child my maiden name in a double barrelled surname if I use my husband's surname in daily life.

[Winter2028]

I never officially changed my surname after marriage as it's hard to do in my country unless you do deed poll. I just added my married surname in brackets which does allow me to get a bank account, mortgage under my married surname and use it professionally. It's a very English surname and when I moved back to UK 9 years ago I quite liked the sound of it. I also married in Europe where it is very common for ladies to take on their husband's surname and when I lived in europe, the embassy asked if I would like to add married name to my passport and it was easy to do.

However my maiden name is still in my passport and also the nhs has both my maiden and married names.

I am pregnant now and we have decided we would like a double barrelled surname for our child. I don't have any brothers or male cousins sharing my name so it would be nice if the next generation has my surname. My husband is also the last of his line..

Not strange at all

Not strange

I think it's fine if you want them to have both of your surnames. Of course double barrelling only works for one generation so your child won't be able to do the same when they have their own children (or they would end up triple barrelled). But you can do it if you want.
Depends how the names sound together though, some double barrelled names sound ridiculous. But if they are relatively compatible then go for it.

Not particularly no

i gave my son my maiden name as a middle name. No double barrel.

Yes

Why if my maiden name is in my passport.

Double-barrel your son's or use one surname as a middle name.
I'd get yours double-barrelled too, instead of having the different surnames.

Find but double barrel yours too to avoid confusion.

i would double barrel all of your names (yours, husband, child) if you’ve unofficially sort of done this anyway. We double barrelled our child’s name but we both use our maiden names.

Technicality with German law but I can't double barrel mine and pass it onto my child under German naming law (updated one). Child can have double barrelled name from parents maiden names. Baby is German through my dh as well as British.

But your baby will be born in the UK, so UK naming conventions apply.
My cousin and his wife gave their DC a different surname. Nor an issue, other than they are Mr Smith and Ms Jones and the DC are Noah Skywalker and Olivia Skywalker. Ms Jones gets called Mrs Smith and Mrs Skywalker a fair bit but otherwise it's not an issue.

" Not the real names

Yes. but German naming conventions apply when registering for a German passport.

'Surnames entered on foreign documents are not relevant for the evaluation according to German law.

Consequently, surnames that appear on, for example, British birth certificates are not automatically recognised under German law.'

I want my child to have German and eu citizenship so this is relevant.

That could get very complicated.

I would do whatever is going to be most straightforward for your child.

@pbdr i completely agree it SHOULD only work for one generation but I did come across a young person recently who had a triple barrelled last name!!

Not really. Little Noah is now an adult, married, and his wife recently gave birth. I asked what the child's surname is - his father's mother's or a new one.
It's not that different from being Mr Smith, Ms Jones and DC Smith-Jones/Jones-Smith.

So would you be:-

Susan Smith
Jack Jones
Aloysius Smith-Jones

Or would you be:-

Susan Jones
Jack Jones
Aloysius Smith-Jones

I think that you are saying you are (1) legally but (2) in general and so you would introduce yourself as “Hi. I’m Susan Jones.”

The first grouping makes total sense but the second is a bit confusing. You will probably have people who know you assuming that your husband is Jack Smith. I’m not sure why that would be a problem though. Unless you are booking flights with friends or something!

I think if I saw the grouping 2 above I would assume that one of you is not your child’s biological parent. And that there is a Smith somewhere out there. Not sure if that would bother you? (It would me - I like simplicity but I know that I am a bit weird about this type of thing.)

When I book flights I book under my maiden name..cos my biometrics have my maiden name and there was a time an airline had a problem with me booking under my married name even though it was in my passport.. we were still let through but dh is a bit paranoid now..

We will basically be.
Alice Lee Yi Ling (Mrs Alice Smith)- Alice Smith mostly in the UK
John Smith
Raphael Kurt Ziyan Lee-Smith

Aware the double barrel name in thus case sounds awful, ours sound a lot better but just for illustration sake.

We are an interracial couple so I guess if people think I am the step mum then dh had relationships 2 women consecutively with the same ethnicity? I guess it could happen but it's a bit odd as I am very obviously a 'Lee'

Go for it.
It sounds that double barrelling your child's surname is valid and legal in both jurisdictions, and it will be practical for them to have the same surname in both passports.

More strange for me is that you are using your DH's surname unofficially, however, having double barrelled child will kind of improve it, so no issue there.

I can see why your situation is complicated, but personally I would always want to have to same surname as my child (unless they decide to change theirs as an adult!). If much of the time (legally or otherwise) you are known as Smith, then I would just use Lee as his middle name.

I do really understand not wanting your maiden name to “die out” but if you can’t change yours legally, then personally I would mourn that and try to move on- as I definitely think having the same name as your son on official documents would make your lives simpler and easier. I guess only you know how often the names would be used and what is most important to you?

Well my mum never had the same name as me so I think this is probably a british thing. It is not the norm in my country to have the same name as your children. Ðh's mum never had the same name as her children either.. if that's the only concern then I am fine with that.

It's not. A child can't be given a double barrelled surname in Germany.

New change in the law effective in May 2025: https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/germany-double-barrelled-named-rules-b2305776.html

Baby would be born after that.. my dh check and it has passed the bundestag stage. Bundesrat said no objections.

Statement from bundesrat

Worst case scenario-if you split up with your DH would you still want to keep his name, even unofficially? What about travelling with your child? What if your child wanted to live in your home country and preferrred not to use their ‘European’ surname? I would add your surname as well.