Middle names

[ChristmasJumpers]

I am pregnant with DD2 and think we're settled on Felicity as her name after lots of discussion. We're now struggling with middle names.

I have 2 middle names and so does DH, so we carried this on with DD1. At the time we thought she would be our only child, so we honoured DHs aunty who died recently with one middle name and a frequent family middle name from my side.

Now we have nobody left to honour (so to speak) as I find it odd to use names of living family members. How on earth do we come up with 2 middle names? I'd really like to stick to the tradition of 2 but it seems weird to pick random names with DD1s having so much meaning.

How have other people chosen their middle names?

Felicity Catherine
Felicity Victoria
Felicity Joy
Felicity Ann

If you want a meaningful middle name are there any inspirational people/places/flowers/precious stones/songs/seasons/months/nature words etc which have meaning to you which work as names? Are there any male family names with easy feminisations to use this time? Could you ask DD1 for a name suggestion? Or is there another family member who you'd trust to choose a middle name for your daughter? Any virtue names which speak to your family (Hope/Joy/Faith)?

We did traditional family middle names. My son got one from DH's side and my daughter got one from my side.

My middle name is basically the runner-up choice for my first name. My brother has random middle name, my sister has (then) living grandmother's name and my other brother has deceased grandfather's name.

I'd go back through your family tree. Also, don't be afraid to use a living relative's name.

Lots of great places to start here, thank you! DD1 is 17 months, so her contribution would probably be "baby" 😂

Felicity is a lovely name!

I don't think it's wrong to honour a person who is alive. My mother was named after her grandmother, and her grandmother was alive at that point. But I understand that there are different traditions around names, and you should of course do what feels right for you and your family.

I have friends who "used up" all of their names on their first daughter (first name plus two middle names, all family names), and had some difficulty finding names for their second daughter. After some thinking they chose a first name that was not a family name but they both really liked it, the first middle name was after a sportswoman that they both admired, and the second middle name was after the midwife!

What's wrong with living family names, my first I used my fathers name for a middle name, my second I used my mothers and the third we used a passed grandfathers name.

Would you reconsider using names of people alive? You get to see the pride in their face when you tell them you've named your child after them! 💕

Sorry, to clarify I don't actually have an issue with naming after living relatives, it just won't work for us. My issues if we did would be that I have a huge family so I wouldn't want to choose one person over another. DH has a tiny family full of men who we wouldnt fancy naming her after. Neither of us like our mums names enough (nor do they - I think they'd be mortified), and I just wouldn't know who to choose from my many aunties & cousins. We were both already grandparent-less when we were born.

My children have 2 middle names. They have one family name and 1 name we loved but wouldn't use due to popularity

Dd1s family nane is after dh grandmother
Dd2s family name is after my grandfather
Ds family name is after my grandmother

OP, thank you for the update, and for explaining your reasoning.
Very understandable.
Sorry about your grandparents.

I hope you will find the right middle names for your new baby!

In that case I would prob try think outside the box a little to find names that have some meaning for you, just because your first child has meaningful names and because you want two middle names. Maybe a singer you both love, a character from a TV show you watch together, a pet ye might have had, a version of your name and your OHs name? 🤷🏼‍♀️

You could also use your name or a female variant of dhs name

Haha she might surprise you! Mine was the same age and his contribution was 'cool' 😂

So ideas, pp had great suggestions. Further thoughts....any role models in your life? Teachers you revered? People who have shaped you or just helped you along the way? Celebs? Women from myth and legends? My son is named after a character in a book I loved. Nicely also happened to be a family name for DH, but the name was on the list regardless!

DH and I were stumped for middles so we made a game out of it over dinner. We both wrote down a name for every letter of the alphabet (so each had a list of 26) on little scraps of paper. Pulled one name from each list at a time and compared them to choose a winner from that pair. Then choose another two and so on until you have a winners list of 26. We then repeated with 2 names at time from the final 26 but this time it was winner stays on. It's how we chose my son's full name, two came out together which worked nicely so went with it.

That's a nice suggestion from @GoldenNuggets08 and @17caterpillars1mouse , to use a version of your name or your husband's name, or a combination.

Use your names?

I'm named after two badass women in history and always kinda liked that fact. So that could be somewhere to find inspiration?

www.historyextra.com/100-women/100-women-results/

Felicity Marie Grace would give her some serious role models! Felicity Clara Emmeline... Be an interesting talking point later. I do enjoy a name chat. Clara means bright and Emmeline brave which are also nice words to be associated with.

Easy one - use the first names of both Grandmothers.

Nothing weird/ uncomfortable about using living family names for middle names - as they are hardly ever used in day to day life (pretty sure both my Grandmothers forgot that I have their names for my middles not long after the birth announcement 🤣) Only issue might be if you have a boy in future - you might find the Grandads suggesting their names too😁

Most of my family have living relatives names for middle names btw - as do lots of people I know; indeed it was always the traditional thing to do. I’m kind of surprised you find it odd tbh! It’s only using living relatives names as first names that has become rarer - likely because we celebrate individuality more now than in the past.

Both my children have two middle names.
My son has my FIL first name (living) and my Dad's (deceased before child born)
My daughter has my two grandmother names (both deceased before child born)
I think you need to go with two.
You could use one of your middle names or a female variation of one of DH's. You could use flower, stone, or month names from your wedding if it works?

Also whilst your DD1 have meaningful name in an emotional way because they belong to people you know it doesn't mean than DD2's name will necessarily be less meaningful. If anything it could be more. My DC both have a nod to a relative and then a name I chose because I liked it. They're both characters from books I love. I talk to them about the stories, why I liked them, why I loved the character, what the name means, why I chose it etc. They're only small but they seem to really enjoy hearing the stories of the origins of those names much more than they want to hear about great aunt bertha

A two syllable then one syllable middle name works well, e.g.

Felicity Mabel Grace
Felicity Rosa May
Felicity Alice Niamh
Felicity Ava Kate
Felicity Clara June
Felicity Iris Jade
Felicity Willow Sky
Felicity Violet Maeve

This!

Ds has his dad’s name as his middle name and dd has my mums name as her middle name. Both still alive. My mum was so honoured.

we didn’t use Mils name as I didn’t like it . End of,I’m not using a name I don’t like.