Remembering my Father

[mummymovingtolondon]

I have been browsing a while to see if anyone else is in a similar dilemma!

I very tragically lost my darling father last year. In that time, I’m very grateful to have had a baby girl amid all the grief - and I’m trying to find a way to remember my Dad in her name.

Obviously his name couldn’t be in hers as it’s a male name… interested to know how others would do it?

I was thinking to add his mothers name in her middle name (my grandmother) - would that be a nice tribute?

Grief really does make things confusing!

any advice / thoughts are welcomed!

His mother's name is a nice idea.

Can his name be feminised? Like Harry becomes Harriett

Yes. What Enko said.

Your surname as middle name? That’s quite common in parts of Scotland.

Assuming she will have your DP’s surname that is.

I did think of that but felt like it didn’t sound like him… I guess the type of name it is…

What was his name, and we can advise better?

You won’t forget him. He and your daughter never met. She does not have to bear his name, or a derivative of it. That would be for you, not for her.

I think using the middle name as a tribute to a parent is a lovely idea. Give us a clue about names you like, what your Dear Father's name was, and his mother's, and we can help!

This is my thinking.

You will always remember your lovely Dad.

I think the trying to use his Mum's name is stretching things a bit, in truth.

Unfortunately our last name is already double barrelled 😢

I felt using his mums name as a middle name is a tribute and also keeping family names close

my grandmothers name was Lily (I felt this could be the middle - and a sort of tribute to him)

But also considering just using my middle name (also a family name) and giving daughter the same as me ?

Personally, I think naming someone to form a connection with a relative is a burden to the child, they will grow up with an obligation to honour someone they don't know.
I agree with some previous comments that your daughter doesn't need a connection to your dad in her name. She will come to know him through you, that's enough of a connection.
Perhaps somewhere at home you could have a photo of your dad with you as a child, alongside a photo of you with your daughter, then she will see the connection.
Losing a parent is heartbreaking and I'm sorry for your loss.

I’m so sorry for your loss. I agree that using his mum’s name sounds more like a tribute to her than him.

As someone who lost their dad suddenly, I know how difficult and confusing it can be. You don't want to look back and regret a name decision you made in the midst of grief.

I would pick the nicest name possible regardless of its origin. No one will ever know or appreciate its importance but will notice if it jars with the first name although Lilly is lovely.

I'd choose another tribute to your dad. He will always be your dad and will never be forgotten by those he loved.

Take care OP x

Use the paternal part of the double barreled surname?

Could you look up the meaning of his name and find a female name with the same meaning?

I'm sorry for your loss.

This is a great idea.

you could also use your first name as presumably he had a hand in choosing it.

My mother died when I was 10 so when I had my daughter, I wanted to name her after my mother.

My mother was called, "Elena". I looked up variations or nicknames of her name e.g. Helen, Ileana, Alena, Ellie, Nena, Lena and chose one.
It's still honored my mother but was unique to her.

I forgot the rest of what I wanted to say, d'uh.

My daughter also has my father's name as her middle name. I found a feminine variation of his name and nicknames and did the same. This was easy because I am named after him so it's technically a variation of my name.

@mummymovingtolondon I am sorry for the loss of your father

How about picking a name with the same initial for your DD? So if he was Steven, she could be Sarah? I'm sorry for your loss.

I like the suggestion of finding a name with the same meaning as his, or maybe you could find a name with a meaning you associate with him eg. Kind (Caris), hard-working (Amelia) etc