Tobias

[17caterpillars1mouse]

Tobias has been a favourite name for many years, but just Tobias, not Toby.

I know everybody says it will hey shortened and you can't control what others call him once he gets to school, but does anybody know any Tobias's of any age who go by Tobias?

Both my dds have quite long names (7 and 8 letters) and neither have been shortened at school so far. We do have family nicknames for them

I was in college with a guy called Tobias, no one shortened it.

Yes I know one who just goes by Tobias I find mumsnet insist everyone will use a nickname but I have a child with a 3 syllable name and no one has ever shortened it, not even at school.

Thinking about it there is an Evelyn in dds class who is never Evie and an Imogen who is never Immy yet both people would assume would automatically be shortened at school

I wouldn't insist that everyone will use a nickname, but I would insist that there is no method to ensure it doesn't happen if you choose a name with a commonly used diminutive. The existence of a random 40 year old Tobias who has never shortened their name doesn't make it more or less likely that the OP's kid might go by Toby at some stage.

I think it mostly comes down to what you call him and what he calls himself. If neither of you ever shorten it then others very probably won't either.

My oh works with a Tobias who is very much a Tobias. I shortened it without thinking (member of family is Toby) got rightly corrected (by my oh) and wouldn't dream of doing it again. He's 100% Tobias!

I know one who is Tobias and 3 Toby's and one Toe.
You can choose not to call him Toby but as it is the easy shortening would you mind if he grew up to be called Toby?
Even if everyone respects that he name is Tobias he may get older and choose to be Toby.

I use the shortening of my name that my Mum said told me after I had used it for a few years that she has always hated it.
I don't really get why she called me a name with one known shortening if she hated it so much. Its not like calling a kid Elizabeth and hating Betty, as there are so many common variations, but with my name, and Tobias, there is one shortening and its up to the person if they want to use it.
If its just a preference for Tobias rather than a hatred of Toby it would probably be fine either way.

Tobias is a great name!
I am from a country where the nickname for Tobias is usually "Tobbe", or sometimes "Tompa".
But I know one Tobias in my country who is always called Tobias, he is 50 years old.

I don't think you can stop Toby's I'm sure they will pop up from time to time in his life.

We have a son called Tobias. He’s never especially liked his full name and insists on being called Toby. So - you may not get your way even when you love the name yourselves!

I know a preschool aged one who is Tobias 95% of the time but that's very much at his own insistence. His parents and wider family still sometimes use Toby as it's such a natural shortening and there's no way to know if he will still be as insistent on 1, 5 or 10 years time that he doesn't like the name Toby.

If you don't want him to be Toby and you don't like the shortening then don't use Tobias as there is no way of ensuring he won't ever be called Toby. Its the natural nickname for it and one he's likely to use at some point in his life.

I would never think to short a tibia to a to y!
But as a zoo said? Think it mainly comes down to how he refers to himself ☺️

Omg the typos!!!
Tobias to Toby*

Tompa is sweet, fun.

I know one who was Toby all through school, but as an adult has switched to being Tobias at work as it sounds more professional.

I actually don't think names get shortened unless you shorten them, at least in my case. I know an Ana Maria who never gets shortened and she has 2 names. The Tobias in the Divergent book series never gets shortened and although that is obviously fictional, I suppose it shows the author didn't feel the need to make him Toby.

I think it could work. 😊Toby doesn't necessarily come easily from Tobias as well, they are different sounds. It isn't like Isabel-Izzy.

I have an Imogen whose not Immy or Gen, she hates the name Immy and says Gen isn't her. Everyone just accepts it so I don't think Tobias would necessarily get shortened to Toby.

I know a Tobias in his 40s who is always Tobias

But it would be crazy to give him a name with an obvious shortening that you don’t like. He won’t necessarily feel the same as you, and unless he refuses to answer to Toby, he will more likely than not be called Toby.

Reminds me of Tobias Fünke from Arrested Development

Up to at least Y7 he will be Tobias if you tell everyone he is Tobias. You just have to decide how much it would bother you if he independently decides he would like to go by Toby when he's older. Personally I think I like Tobias better than Toby - it's more unusual and suits a wider range of ages and types (despite the existence of Toby Jones, I can't really picture any other middle-aged Toby).

I have a Tobias but we go by Toby as that's what I prefer. That said he has been called all sorts of nicknames including Toblerone and Tobes. Generally if you use Tobias then that's what he'll be called, at least until secondary school anyway x

My son has a longer name, never shortened. He has an Imogen in his class, never shortened. He has an Alastair who is Ally, but came that way, the children did not do it. Every child is called their given name, or their parent's name for them.