Suddenly we hate everything on our list!

[TradedAtlanta]

Help! We've been collecting potential names for our DS and were busy debating which one we liked best when we suddenly decided we don't feel comfortable with any of them. They all feel too try hard and fail what my DH calls the supermarket test... would you feel like a numpty calling the name out in the supermarket? DH's family are French, mine English. Names we have on the list that feels try hard:

Xavier
Florian
Yann
Etienne
Elias

Sebastien was top of the boys list when we had our DD but a friend has since had a Sebastian so we don't want to use it now. Help! What should we call him?

The men you know named Florian may be big and burly but of course the name sounds feminine in English because it sounds like 'floral' so must be derived from something to do with flowers? And it's unusual here of course.

Obviously it's a run of the mill name wherever these men come from (somewhere in Eastern Europe?) but to Brits unfamiliar with the name it may indeed sound wussy. That's pretty obvious.

We sort of like the idea boys names that are a little more stereotypically feminine sounding. We definitely don't want something that sound "strong" or "macho". I think these stereotypes are quite culturally determined anyway - ie what sounds a bit feminine to a British ear wouldn't in other countries. Re the supermarket test - I am being a bit tongue in cheek and agree that it shouldn't matter what other people think. I suppose it's more reckoning with whether we are people who would prefer a name that you'd hear and notice, because it's slightly less usual or whether we would prefer traditional/everyday. For our DD it seemed easier as it seems there are more names that sound usual but are not top of the charts. For boys our impression is that you've got top of the chart/traditional OR a bit out there with not a lot of middle ground.

Jerome as suggested by pp is a great name.
Dominic
Christopher
James
Stephan
Karl/Carl

For boys our impression is that you've got top of the chart/traditional OR a bit out there with not a lot of middle ground.

Really? There's lots of middle ground names that are well known and classic but not too 100:

Marcus
Clement
Quentin
Darius
Fabian
Tristan
Victor
Vincent

Just take a look at the ons lists outside the top 100

I’m not sure why flowery equals ‘wussy’? What a mean little insult. What wrong with being more flowery or feminine?

@Lilacsunflowers you see, to me they mostly sound like names I would notice for being slightly out there (with Marcus being the exception). It just highlights the subjectivity of names really - there is of course nothing wrong with any of the names on your list and I do know men with several of those names.

Dominic and Christopher have also been on our list but we're not so keen on the short forms.

I know quite a few young children with one French parent. Some names used are Louis, Maxence, Olivier, Hugo, Edwin. No-one finds these outlandish at all. I really like Etienne and Elias from your list.

@gretr well no, there's nothing wrong it per se, but people are narrow minded. Kid might get picked on.

I am just pointing out what the average Brit will probably think of the name Florian. It's obviously fairly unusual over here. It's not necessarily what I think of the name.

And I found your statement about 'laughing' at another poster (because they don't have your familiarity with Florians) a bit wierdly aggressive. I assume it is your child's name or maybe your partner's?

Objectively it is a fairly nice name, but living in the UK I would be hesitant to use it.

No I was laughing as I was imagining the Florians I know being ‘flowery’. It quite clearly says that in my post, that I was laughing at the thought of it, not at a poster - that would be odd, I’ve never met the poster?!

I just wanted to reassure the poster that most people are open minded. Building sites don’t usually have the best reputation, but there has definitely not been any bullying over someone’s name.

My DH also works in construction. Whilst we're going hard on stereotypes, I reckon he would say that overwhelmingly male workplaces are quite unphased by European/non British names on account of familiarity with footballers with those names. DH was certainly very pleased when a Premier league team signed a player with his very French, often mispronounced in England name.

A French and English family I know used Sean as it sounded similar to Jean.

@gretr

'I am laughing a bit AT THE POSTER who.,.'

That's what you wrote. Maybe you should have put 'I am laughing at the idea of the name Florian being thought of as feminine.' That would have been clear.

My apologies, yes that was not clear at all!

Victor
Raphael
Maxime
Hector
Alec
Arthur
Benjamin

OP, I like Kit as a nn for Christopher, and have a friend, Dominic, who is known as Kim - go figure.....

Didier?

Stick with Sebastian

We were down to Xavier and Gabriel 16 yrs ago and went with Gabriel. Still love both names. We have lived in 3 countries and Gabriel was well known and used in all three.