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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Name clash - help!

46 replies

Mommamommamomma3 · 23/03/2022 10:45

Due with DS1 in 2 weeks! Very excited and we had his name picked from 20 week scan

DH’s brother and his wife had their DD yesterday and they have called her a name which sounds very similar to ours!

Basically they called her Harlow, and our name for our boy was Arlo :(

I’m now panicking that we can’t use it because DH’s family will think we’ve done it on purpose but we didn’t have any idea of the name they were going to choose (they were waiting till birth to find out gender and said they hadn’t picked any names)

Would it be so awful if we go ahead with our name for our baby? It’s what we’ve called him since 20 weeks and we’ve bought stuff with his name on and got his name on his nursery wall. I know they’re little things but for most of this pregnant he’s been my Arlo I can’t imagine not naming him that were so set on the name :(

OP posts:

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MangoBiscuit · 23/03/2022 10:49

Did they know you were calling him Arlo?

Original poster

Mommamommamomma3 · 23/03/2022 10:52

@ @MangoBiscuit no we’ve kept it to ourselves so it’s genuinely just a coincidence

OP posts:

HomecomingKween · 23/03/2022 10:54

If you've bought stuff with his name on it that's your smoking gun evidence that you're not just being odd copycats.

Do you leave nearby to one another? Are they likely to be in the same primary school?

Blimecory · 23/03/2022 10:54

I think it’s ok. The names look very different, and one is a girl, one is a boy. There is a similarity in sound, but it’s not awful at all. Just hope everyone pronounces their Hs properly.

Original poster

Mommamommamomma3 · 23/03/2022 10:59

@HomecomingKween no we live about 45 mins apart! So they won’t be in the same school or anything I just worry because they are cousins DH’s family will be weird about it and they might!

Yeah we pretty much bought the first personalised item as we left the 20 week scan Lol

OP posts:

HomecomingKween · 23/03/2022 11:01

[quote Mommamommamomma3]@HomecomingKween no we live about 45 mins apart! So they won’t be in the same school or anything I just worry because they are cousins DH’s family will be weird about it and they might!

Yeah we pretty much bought the first personalised item as we left the 20 week scan Lol[/quote]
After you've sent all the congratulations send them a photo of his name on the nursery wall and make a lighthearted thing about it.

Sally872 · 23/03/2022 11:08

Personally if it was me I would change it. Not in case in laws were upset but I would feel weird talking about my neice Harlow and my child Arlo. Then explaining the story if how it'd a huge coincidence on repeat followed by worrying they think I am weird.

That said if you really can't think of anything else then you aren't doing anything wrong. And I know cousins with similar names and after the initial mention it is their names I don't think about it much.

MakeUsACuppa · 23/03/2022 11:13

Agree with @HomecomingKween, the chances a so small that sending a picture as 'proof' you've not copied.

You never know, they might not be bothered and see the funny side.

SunshineAndFizz · 23/03/2022 11:14

It's fine, the only time things like this matter is it's exactly the same name.

However, I'd probably tell them sooner rather than later that you've chosen Arlo as a name (and show the pre-bought stuff), otherwise they could get miffed thinking you've copied them.

Velvian · 23/03/2022 11:21

My DN has a name that rhymes with DD's name. I did think it was a strange choice for a while, but didn't say anything. I don't think about it at all now.

We called our DCs by names in pregnancy that we did not end up giving them. You may find your DS is not Arlo, but someone else when he arrives, IYSWIM.

Isonthecase · 23/03/2022 11:26

Just text back saying how funny, we've obviously got similar taste in names! And send a photo of the Arlo personalised pile. You're making this way more complicated than it needs to be.

TreatTrimTame · 23/03/2022 11:28

I have cousins Hannah and Anna. My grandmother could never tell the difference between the names and called both Hannah. No idea why and I do not think it was done on purpose, it was just a mental block for her. Other than my grandmother nobody batted an eyelid. So I think for a boy and girl there will be even less misunderstanding who you are talking about etc.

Horaceandgus · 23/03/2022 11:29

I know cousins called Leon and Leo
Nobody battered an eye over it
I know another lady who called her two Noah and Nora-bit too samey but not my choice
I’d call your baby arlo if that’s the name you’ve chosen-congratulations on your bubs

Amdone123 · 23/03/2022 11:31

Don't change it !
They're 2 different names.
Congratulations BTW.

RiverRats · 23/03/2022 11:33

I’d tell them soon that you’ve chose the name Arlo and show the proof, but I wouldn’t change it. In my family lots of people have the same/similar names and it’s never been an issue

LabelMaker · 23/03/2022 11:33

Use the name you love when you see him.

DaisyDeli · 23/03/2022 11:53

They are two different names! Don't change it !

MangoLipstick · 23/03/2022 11:58

I wouldn’t worry about it, they are different names. We have similar sounding names in my family and it’s fine! If you are worried about what the family will think, just send them a picture of your nursery and say this is what you are calling you son, make light of it.

Blimecory · 23/03/2022 11:59

They’re very different style of names too.

LampHat · 23/03/2022 12:06

In Yorkshire they would be pronounced the same But I don’t think you should change it, it’s a lovely name.

Pemba · 23/03/2022 13:06

Harlowe is an awful name for a girl. Sounds like harlot. New town. Could you be rude about it and put them off? 😁

Probably not a good idea, you'd just end up not talking to your in laws. Very annoying for you though!

Captainj1 · 23/03/2022 13:14

I have two cousins (both my mum’s sisters’ daughters) who have the exact same name. It’s my mum’s name. It’s never been an issue, when we were young they were known to us as little S and big S. Don’t worry about it. Choose the name you like best, whatever you choose you won’t please everyone.

thirstyformore · 23/03/2022 13:33

My brother and cousin have the same name. They just got called big and little [name] when we were growing up.

It's fine.

Lilaclavenders · 23/03/2022 14:34

I would feel weird talking about my neice Harlow and my child Arlo.

This would put me off too!

There's SO many other names to choose...

Calandor · 23/03/2022 15:10

@Pemba

Harlowe is an awful name for a girl. Sounds like harlot. New town. Could you be rude about it and put them off? 😁

Probably not a good idea, you'd just end up not talking to your in laws. Very annoying for you though!

Come on now harlot and Harlow don't sound like the same word. Unless you pronounce T as a W

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