Naming: everything I choose is super popular

[Qwerty2000]

Reposting here as accidentally put in pregnancy thread: This is not a major problem but it is bugging me. This is my first pregnancy and every name I think I like, when I google it it appears in the top 5,10,20 of popular names in 2019.20,21 and even 22! For mums that have children already, is this an issue? Are there ten kids with your child's name in their class now, making you regret the choice? I remember there being a massive bunch of John, Sam, Helen, Jennifer and Louise in my school years. I made the mistake of running some names by my mum and the phrase 'too common' keeps coming up. (Although this is apparently not a problem for classic names like Thomas, Charles etc). Help

What names do you like?
At my sons nursery there are lists of all the kids names for each room/age group. There are all sorts of weird and wonderful names on there, I’ve seen maybe two that are thought to be ‘popular’ or ‘common’.
If you love the names, don’t worry about what anyone else’s kids are called. You’ve got to say it 50 times a day for the rest of your life!

All research shows children do better with more familiar common names. There are more Emma’s at Oxford and Cambridge than any other girls name. The modern obsession for choosing a different or outlandish name the research suggests results in more bullying, more negative assumptions my teachers and employers. So to be honest I wouldn’t worry.

Remember that a much wider variety of names are used now compared to 30+ years ago. So the number 1 name now is given to proportionally fewer babies than the number 1 name several decades ago.

Plus, names are popular because they’re lovely! Being popular isn’t inherently a bad thing.

Do take variations into account as well though. I know far more girls called Isabel/Isabelle/Isabella than I do girls called Olivia for example, even though Olivia is higher up the charts.

Plus you could pick a really unusual name but happen to go to nursery with another one!

The thing is popular names are popular because they're nice names and appeal to a lot of people. It's a difficult balance finding a lovely name but one where there won't be four kids in the class with the same one!

Popularity totally depends on the school too.
DS1 was one of 4 in his year of 90 in reception, yet when we moved back into the area 5 years later, and ended up at a school half a mile away in the same town, he was the only one in his year of 80.

If you love it, go for it.

What names do you like?

There are hundreds of well known, familiar, easy to spell, lovely names outside the top 500. You might be surprised.

Can you share with us the names you like?

I have a child with a top 10 name. We’ve never had another one in her class at school, nursery, or toddler groups. Hasn’t been an issue in the slightest.

My eldests name was fairly unusual (268th the year she was born). Her best friend in her nursery class had the same name and they've gone through primary and now high school together. Constantly referred to with their middle names by each other, teachers and other friends. Dd2 has a very popular name (26 the year she was born) and while we know of lots, noone in her nursery class or any of her toddler groups has ever shared her name.

The point of all that waffle is just pick a name you like and don't worry about popular

My daughter's name was only 1 of 60 in the country the year she was born. She as ended up being in the same class as one of those!

I chose number 1 in 2010 and number 3 in 2014. With 2022 I went a bit rogue and I think his is 92 or something!

Dd1 never had another girl with the same name in her 3 form entry year, and neither does dd2- I haven’t heard more than 2 or 3 in the whole school!
Dd1 is one of two in the same dance class, and a variant of her name is in the same gymnastics gym as her (not her group) so I’d say go with what you love.
I honestly think that as soon as it hits top 10 popularity then less people name their child that, so it drops in popularity. It’s 10-30 you want to watch out for

My 3 are Isabella (Bella), Poppy and Hugo by the way, to give you an idea of the popular-ness!

My dd is in a class of 31 and 4 of the boys are Oliver. They go by Oliver A, Oliver B etc She has a name that was 19th ish for her year and hasn’t been in a class with another of her name yet. Why the school didn’t spread the Olivers out a bit over the other 3 classes in the year group I don’t know! I had the top name for my early 80’s year and I always rather liked having a popular name that everyone knew, could pronounce and never teased me for. I also liked getting pens with my name on!

Agree with everyone above. Plus, I think there are a lot of speculative lists published by sites for clicks. Nobody knows what names are popular in 2022 yet! So sites make lists of names "searched a lot" or "added to most people's lists" which are meaningless. Stick to the ONS data and Dark Greener for the actual list.

One of my dc has a super common name (been between 1 and 5 on the ons list for a while) and we know loads of others. I still used it because we loved it and no regrets.

@Frankiefarr

All research shows children do better with more familiar common names. There are more Emma’s at Oxford and Cambridge than any other girls name. The modern obsession for choosing a different or outlandish name the research suggests results in more bullying, more negative assumptions my teachers and employers. So to be honest I wouldn’t worry.

I would really love to see some sources for these claims, please.

I think you should just choose a name you like.

It's very common for people to pick a name deliberately because it's unusual then find it's actually incredibly popular and everyone else has picked it thinking it's unusual too (there is a chapter in Freakonomics on this)- all those Arthurs and Noahs whose parents thought they'd found a name no one else would use! You don't know what's going to happen with popularity so just go for something you like.

Just choose what you like. Who cares if there’s someone else in their class with the same name.
I had a mate with the same name as me in my class as a child. We loved it!
I accidentally chose what was, apparently,a top 10 name for my Dd. Never come across another one in real life yet!

Honestly, go for the name you love - you’ll regret it forever if you don’t. Even if a name is popular there’s only a small chance there will be another one in the same class - and so what if there is? They are all individuals and they are all special in their own way, the name does not make them unique.

Remember there’s no guarantee that you’ll be the only one with a child by that name. My friend and her partner went for an Italian name (she’s from another European country, that’s not Italy, he’s from Scotland) as they wanted an unusual name - which it was, until an Italian family moved to the neighbourhood with a little boy the same age with the same name who joined the same class. Friends face was a picture

Even if you choose a popular name you might not come across many more.

I have a popular name for it's time & only ever knew two others.

One my age & one my son's age!

There is an app that tells you how popular names are in your area. I’ve always tried to go for a name that most people have heard of but is uncommon.
However when my ds and dil had their son and told me his name , I asked him if they new it was the number one name that year and he cheered , he was well happy ! Never come across that response before 😁 dgs was the only one with that name in his year at school .

I’ve got a Freya and a Daisy, both the only ones in their classes

DD is 15 the name we picked wasn’t even in the top 50 however when she got to school she was 1 of 3! With the the same name. However there was only 1 of the no 1 boys name in her year group. So if you like a name go for it.

I have an Oliver, number 1 name in his year. Only 1 other in his year group of 180.

I work in a preschool (about 30-40 kids) and you'd be surprised at which names can be common. Recently we had 2 Lily, 2 Kareena/ Karina, 2 Louie, 2 Phoebe, 2 Adam. I don't know what's top 10 but no other names doubled in past 3 years. We usually use 'little' and 'big' to differentiate (different ages)!

Both of my kids have classic, but popular names. It doesn't bother me, even when I received artwork in primary school that was clearly another X's as mine was crap at art!

With the benefit of hindsight, I'm glad my husband vetoed some of my more creative name choices. I think they were a bit try-hard. And not perhaps as appropriate if they end up in a professional services environment.

@Frankiefarr

All research shows children do better with more familiar common names. There are more Emma’s at Oxford and Cambridge than any other girls name. The modern obsession for choosing a different or outlandish name the research suggests results in more bullying, more negative assumptions my teachers and employers. So to be honest I wouldn’t worry.

There must be a strong element of correlation not causation here? The kinds of families whose children are likely to go to Oxbridge are probably also the kinds of families who choose classic, conventional names. Certainly in the past, anyway - I'm not sure this will hold true as naming trends diversify and all the Emmas and Sarahs give birth to Florence, Iris, Alma, Mabel etc. (And then perhaps the stats will tell us that the key to your child's success is to give them a name from the 1910s...)