Does everyone do nicknames now??

[IamJob]

On this board anyway there seems to be a trend for giving a child a name then not calling them that name but a nickname.

In my family and extended family we don’t do nicknames - so my niece is Isabelle and we call her Isabelle for example!

Is anyone else the same? Seems odd to me to give a child a name then not call them that name (obviously friends giving a nickname down the line is normal but parents starting off with a nickname instead of the full name you called your child I just don’t get it!)

Both my son's have longer names and known by shortened version. They seem happy with it. Eg think Richard, Rich.

@Crunchymum

Yes, yes nicknames are very different to shortenings / diminutives / derivatives.

Jimmy for James. Dick for Richard etc.

Picking two different names that have no relation at all and deciding one will the the child's nickname.... nah!!! Feck off with thay nonsense.

i know people with nicknames that aren't related to their real names.

They usually are nicknames that aren't names like Bunny or Taffy, not the 'mumsnet' nicknames like Elodie nn Ella or Adeline nn Ada

All my family have nicknames, but they aren't shortened versions of their names. Only in my newphes case, he gets called B as his name begins with a B. However our kids are nicknamed things like bug, peaches, 2012 among many names. I wouldn't count shortened names as a nickname.

@TruffleShuffles

I think some people are missing the OPs point. I see so many posts on here where the OP has chosen a ‘nickname’ they want the child to have an then need help choosing a name that child can have to facilitate the nickname. I find it all a bit backwards. We’re not talking a Thomas shortened to Tom here, and actually the only Tom I know is a Tom and not a Thomas, it’s people saying I want my child to be called Minnie so what name can I give her? Well just call her Minnie if that’s what you like and what she will be referred to.

Nicknames are something that I think evolve with the child but lately on mumsnet the nickname seems to need to be decided before the child’s even born.

Bang on. It's bonkers. Especially the threads where the poster wants to use a nickname that has NOTHING to do with the full name whatsoever 😵‍💫😂

I agree OP, I know lots of people named Catherine, Thomas etc and they all go by their full name

When we were naming our children we deliberately chose names where we liked the full versions and all of the usual diminutive (short) versions.

Nicknames are something else. They may occasionally be related to the actual name, but mostly they evolve separately and are totally different.

That was important to us and it has worked well.

My name doesn't shorten easily, but DH and I have various nicknames for each other, most of which have nothing whatsoever to do with our names, and some of which would be deemed pretty rude by other people.

My sister's name does shorten easily, and while we were children my parents tied themselves in absolute knots trying to insist that she must always be known by the full length version because they didn't like the shortenings. They would even publicly correct her friends, which made she and I both cringe with embarrassment, and was a big double standard too because they (our parents) were both always known by short versions of their names, never the full versions. As an adult, she always uses the short forms, so it didn't work anyway.

I think it is really nice to have a name that can be shortened to a nickname. Nicknames are friendly. I have a one syllable name and no nickname, I would have loved one.

My son has a name which is shortened by many friends and he likes that but professionally, or with people he doesn't know well, he uses his full name.

It's good to have the choice.

I hate the trend of giving someone a shortened name on their birth certificate, eg Katy, Charlie or whatever.

All three of my DC have very short names because I’m not a fan of nicknames. And my understanding of a nickname is that it isn’t something that is planned, it’s not something you get choose or have control over, it’s something that develops naturally over time. It might even be a different nickname among different people. My oldest daughter is called Eva. Her ‘nickname’ is Kitty. It has nothing to do with name but because as a baby she used to make a cute noise when she was sleeping that sounded like a meow and it stuck! I don’t understand the ‘her name is Penelope with the nickname Poppy’ thing. Just call her Poppy if that’s what you’ll be calling her anyway!!

Mine gets shortened by everyone. I don’t really have a preference but my name isn’t even a long one and my parents and family only really call me by the shortened version when getting my attention during a conversation or similar. Almost as I’m spoken to as the short version, but spoken about as full name 🙈

@Santiagopink

I would say that a nickname is something unrelated to the name but based on personality or a particular trait. Like Minty coz they always chew mints, or tintin coz they have a quiff. Shortening Thomas to Tom is just a familiar shortening of a name surely? Nothing particular to mumsnet in calling a child a full name that is more formal and shortening it for casual use. David/ dave, Stephen/Steve, Melanie/Mel. I wouldn't personally say those are 'nicknames', essentially it's the same name

100% this

Well nicknames and diminutives are different. We always knew Castiel would be shortened to Cas, although we use Castiel too. He's also called random, unrelated nicknames like Splodge because we want to, but it isn't like we'd introduce him as Splodge and next week it might be Beastling instead.

And as for "no one does it in rl" of childhood friends, all six of us use a diminutive from occasionally to primarily. Uni friends three of us do, one doesn't. School gate Mom's three don't and four do from sometimes to mostly. It really isn't rare.

@SummaLuvin

I think there is an element of liking a name, but a diminutive sweetening the deal. I think Margarita and is a beautiful name, but I also love Rita so much that it makes me want to use the name even more. (shame DH doesn’t feel the same…)

Also, some names are just long. I have a four syllable name, my sister was 2 when I was born, she was never going to be able to say it in full, so a nickname was needed and I don’t see anything wrong with that being part of the name selection.

I agree. I like Magdalena. I think it's beautiful. But it's long, and I thought, we can call her Maggie too.

My sons name can't really be shortened. But he has a nickname. Spud. Because he always smelled like a jacket potato. Now if id say I'm gonna call my son XXX but use Spud as a nickname, that would be weird

I'm another one picking up on the difference between diminutive and nickname.

Growing up in the 70's almost anyone with a long name was called by a shortened (diminutive) version- Jonathan to Jon/ Jonny/ Jonty, Elizabeth to Lizzie/ Liz/Betty/ Beth etc. The odd ones were those who used the full Alexander or Catherine etc - only one of those in my whole class. So this is very much not a new thing. (Shakespeare's Katherine was called Kate). My parents gave us long 'Christian' names but we were always called the diminutive version from day one. In my parents generation it was all Bob, Reg, Ron etc.

Nicknames are different and not usually used from day one. I have always called my son by the short version if his name but his nickname evolved over their first few months and is a play on his first name - eg nickname Moo that evolved from Matty Matty Moo (not his real name).

I actually think it is more normal to use the shortened version, particularly if over 3 syllables!

The weirdest op's are when people like a nickname but hate the be long form. Eg they like Freddie but hate Frederick

Or when they desperately plan a nickname for a beautiful name that doesn't need a nickname!

@Enko

No we don't use nick names for our children. 2 of mine has names that according to this board will automatically be shortened. Recently I commented that ds name (Conrad) never got shortened to Con and someone had put yet well he is 20 so I'm pretty sure he will remain with his full name.

Dd1 is Phoebe not Pheebs or Phee or fifi again she is in her 20s so this is unlikely to change.

I cut anyone short who tries to shorten my name. No I'm not called Lon and my name is bad enough as it is im not having it made even worse thank you very much.

Dh is known by a nick name he dislike his long name and prefer the short version so we use that.

I don’t think Conrad and Phoebe are the type of names that are very commonly turned into nicknames. By contrast you don’t frequently find a child who goes by Frederick, Thomas, Matthew, Katherine, Elizabeth, Margaret. I think names like Freddie, Tom/Tommy, Matt, Kate/Katie, Beth/Liz/Lizzie, and Maggie are lovely but I can see why people want their child to have the option of using the formal version as adults, especially in professional settings.

This is a very very common thing and has been for as long as I can remember.

It’s a MN thing, there was a thread on here the other day where someone want to name their child a 3 letter name and there was loads of “but what about a nickname” “she won’t be able to have one 😢” like it was some major issue 😂

I don't mind admitting I would have liked to have a name that could be shortened to a diminutive. Obviously it doesn't bother me now, I'm past all that but when I was young and a child I would have loved to be a Sue, Liz or Kate.

I wouldn't say it is a trend. My siblings, parents, grandparents have all gone by nicknames.

Any genealogist will have experiences of people going by nicknames on censuses etc.

My family is the same - everyone goes by their full name even though outside the family they go by nicknames - I'm not sure why!

So eg if we had a Stephen in the family we would call him Stephen even if he went by Ste to his friends or at work.