Foreign name?

[Evianontoast]

Hello. My parents are European and I'm considering a European name for my child (I was born and raised in U.K.). I myself have a foreign name and love it but I have spent my whole life explaining it to people/ correcting their pronunciation. We've told a few people what we'd like to call our daughter and they've all said that it's a bit mean to call a baby a foreign name because it'll spend its whole life correcting people. The name is "Eefje" (Ee-f-ye). Do you think it's cruel to give a child born and raised in the U.K. a non British name?

Call your baby what you'd like to call your baby. It doesn't matter what other people think.

Also, the amount of people I know with standard UK names that have to keep spelling it out, because there's 5 different options of how to spell it... think Kathryn/Catherine/Kathrine for example.

And your kid will probably be unlikely to share their name with someone in their class. I think that's pretty awesome. :)

Is it pronounced Aif-yuh? With the Aif as in waif? I couldn't tell the pronunciation from the way you had written it out. If so I don't think it's difficult to pronounce for a Brit but no one would be able to spell it or probably pronounce it anytime they phoned her.
It reminds the of the Irish name Aoife which I can never remember how to pronounce but is similar. It depends I guess, it is going to be annoying that people who don't know her don't know the name but the people who love her will know so maybe that's all that matters?

I like it as it links to your heritage. My only caveat is it is reasonably easy to pronounce in English (or in the accent you have/of the area you live in). Unfortunately some accents can butcher some beautiful foreign names!

@Tal45 yes, I think so! To be honest, I spend half my life spelling my name over the phone/ correcting people (sometimes I have to repeat it 5 or
6 times and they still don't get it) so... I dunno. Is that a reason not to call you child what you want to call it?

@SnowdropFox my husband can't even really say it properly but it doesn't bother me really. My family will and hopefully his family will get used to it!

@Notyouraveragecupofcoffee that's a very good point about the common English names thing...

[quote Evianontoast]@Tal45 yes, I think so! To be honest, I spend half my life spelling my name over the phone/ correcting people (sometimes I have to repeat it 5 or
6 times and they still don't get it) so... I dunno. Is that a reason not to call you child what you want to call it?

@SnowdropFox my husband can't even really say it properly but it doesn't bother me really. My family will and hopefully his family will get used to it! [/quote]
How much does it bother you? If it drives you nuts then don't do it, if it's just the occasional slight annoyance then go for it! As others said you could have to spell your name out because there are different forms of it in English anyway.

Well, you don't seem sure on how to pronounce it yourself....

Erm... @JustFrustrated I do, I'm
just rubbish at the whole spelling things out phonetically thing...

It’s certainly not cruel.

I wouldn’t because I wouldn’t want to give them the irritation of dealing with it - I don’t think you can compare a name people will struggle to say to common spelling variations like Clare/Claire. I’d find it irritating, but then they might not. So as insurance I’d at least give them an easier middle name, so they can swap later if they don’t.

I wouldn't do it. I have a fairly well known name but there are several ways to do it. I'm sick of having to correct the spelling on it every time I meet someone new. I also have them shortening it, and correct them every time.

I really like my name but it does get frustrating having to spell it all the time. Fortunately I have an easy to spell surname.

*hate them shortening it

Is that Dutch? I think it’s tricky because it’s impossible to know if constantly correcting people’s pronunciation would bug her or if she’d not be bothered. It would drive some people mad, but others would enjoy having a name that’s different.

If it is Dutch, the pronunciation is presumably aif as a pp described, rather than eef. I have a niece whose name is Yfke, which has the ee sound - ‘eefkuh’.

The sound is very similar to all the Eva, Ava, Evie, Aoife names that are so popular at the moment. I think that would put me off more than pronunciation issues to be honest.

We'll be using a non- English name, as we want a name which comes from our culture and heritage. We live in a multicultural world - that means celebrating and welcoming all cultures, not just conforming to one culture.

Your child may not spend their life in English-focused countries, so having a name from the country in which they currently live wouldn't prevent them encountering "how do you spell/pronounce that?" in the future.

Plus, there are loads of English names with multiple spellings and pronunciations.

I think you've picked a lovely name!

It’s not cruel. But it will make your (and your child) lifes somewhat inconvenient.
You will end up spelling the name over and over again every day. If that doesn’t bother you then it’s completely fine and give the name if you love it.

I personally think that in your position I would avoid choosing Eefje. Not only is it not a name any Brit will have heard of it's also going to be really hard to pronounce and spell. Are there no similar names that would help bridge the gap?

I think most English speakers would easily learn to pronounce Eefje as Eef-ye. I like it. Is it Dutch?

Eefje is much more interesting and reflective of your background than a popular top 10 British name. Go for it!

I googed how to pronounce it, would it be Aafe-ya? It sounds nice and I think people would get used to saying it correctly quickly if not spelling it.

I think it’s unfair on your DH to have a name he can’t pronounce properly- unless it’s only a matter of time/ practice.

How about a name that's easier to pronounce or used in both countries?

As a Dutch speaker I think the problem you will have is that everyone will say it eee like in see, not ai like in pay.

There are so many Dutch names which are easier, I think I would be reluctant to use a name which is going to cause them problems to say and spell every single time.

My surname is Dutch and it is very easy to spell out in English and is actually phonetic, (which Eefje isn't in English) and I still get is spelt wrong about 50% of the time.

@ratussbaguss

I personally think that in your position I would avoid choosing Eefje. Not only is it not a name any Brit will have heard of it's also going to be really hard to pronounce and spell. Are there no similar names that would help bridge the gap?

Maybe it will help the brits she meets to expand their horizons then...

Most people will get the pronunciation after being told it once. It may take a couple of repetitions to get the spelling right but anyone who matters should grasp it quickly.

I think it's a beautiful name and would ignore the nay-sayers on here. There seems to be a cohort on here that think anything other than a traditional english name is unacceptable in England. Most other countries don't seem to have the same hang-ups.

I'm Dutch, it's a beautiful name but I'm not sure I'd use it in your position. I have a Dutch name myself and change it to an English version when abroad just because I hate listening to the mispronounciation of my name. But that is purely anecdotal of course.

How do you feel about Saskia? I believe that that is pronouncable in English?

To be fair, the OP did ask for opinions 🤷🏼‍♀️ no one has said it is cruel, which it isn't, and no one has said its not a nice name, or that the OP shouldn't use it if she really loves it. I guess some people would rather avoid hassle they deem potentially unnecessary and for others the amount you love the name weighs that out