Name regret

[Mommy0boys2]

My son is 8 months old and me and my husband just aren’t feeling his name is right 100% . there was a name that we both really liked but it’s a friends little boys name (who is now 3 years old) and we didn’t choose it as we didn’t want to offend/step on their toes. But it just feels like we should have?? Just interested if people think it’s too late to change our sons name at 8 months ?? And thoughts on having the same name as a friends son?? We were close to our friends a few years ago but have drifted apart recently.....

@alexdgr8 thanks for your thoughts x don’t worry it’s not a silly name he’s got now or that we are thinking of changing to. We like traditional English names lol

@ThePinkGuitar I like the way you’ve explained that thanks 😊 honest and to the point 😊

@FluffyEggsontoast that’s very nice of you to say that and myself and my husband have said some people wouldn’t care if they offended or not as long as they were happy. Think we just wished we’d have took that approach at the start 😔

Don’t be beat yourself up op just be honest with them I really think they will appreciate that you tried so hard but need to do this. I think it will show them how much the name means to you. Good luck

We changed our daughters at 10 months. The nn is still the same. We just changed the longer "proper" name. BEST thing we've done. It was like a lead weight was lifted and I just love it now! Go for it..... life's too short!

@thamesk8 that’s great to know someone that’s done it. 😊 do u mind if I ask how others percieved the change? Or was your LO known by the nn anyway so it didn’t make a huge impact to others? Ours would be a total change 😬

I would find it weird at first if someone I knew just randomly changed their child's name but tbh after we all got used to using it I really wouldn't give it a second thought.

I know a few adults who've changed their first names and seemed happy enough but did expect some confusion and irritating relatives who refused to accept it!

I must admit though, I chose names I liked when DC's were born then didn't really think about it again. I'm not keen on my eldests name anymore but it's part of him and his identity so I love that - I just don't like it as a name for other people if that makes any sense whatsoever! Anyway, my point is you soon forget the name as your child grows into their identity then it becomes a positive so if you don't feel you can go ahead with the change I wouldn't worry.

I mean, go for it if it's really bothering you, but personally I wouldn't. I'm not in love with either of my kids' names (DH is a tricky sod and doesn't like any of the names I love but doesn't love any himself either). I've still got serious doubts over DS's name but it's his name now and wouldn't change it at this point. He's 6 weeks old and hasn't even got a birth certificate yet!

8 months is seriously nothing
My child is double that age and yes responds to their name but then I realised if I shout any name at the baby it responds the same!! Can babies even see properly at 8 months? Just change the name! Stop worrying what others think. In a years time no one will even give it a second thought. Change it and move on. Tell your friends today

We changed one of our children's names when they were almost 3!!
I think it was pregnancy hormones that made me choose their initial name.. It didn't sit right pretty quickly and they ended up getting called a nickname unrelated to their actual name.. Realised we had to put a stop to it before they started nursery and just totally changed the name, we got a few laughs from family members, took a couple of days for said child to respond to new name.
Really Really glad we bit the bullet and did it.
They are 6 now and don't even remember the previous name (or nickname)!
Its a funny story they will share as they get older I'm sure!
Do it, if it dsnt feel right after 8 months it's unlikely to, I wish we'd done it sooner! X

Our closest friends (geographically so the ones we see the most) have an Arthur. I think if we had a DS we might ask them if we could use too, if not too weird as we love the name and it goes really well with DP's surname.

I think it is OK as long as he doesn't get confused and wonder what happened to his old name.

Also, my parents just literally never called me by the name on my birth certificate, which I resent even though I love them, because it has made things like banking, etc, really really hard and my passport is in a different name to the one I've always been called. So please don't change it but not change it.

@theotherfossilsister instead of resenting parents and gritting teeth at bank, just change name by deed poll - it's much easier than you're probably anticipating

I disliked DS’s name almost from day one, though DH loved it.

I basically put up with it (for 24 years) then DH himself changed it!

Sorry, DS himself.

@Whatsyourflava weirdly I think they would be sad if I did that. They like the assonance of my full name, and they go one about it. They just don't want to call me that. I have four first names and they kind of fall together like a poem, so I do see it, but won't do that to my child.

I understand the friends kids thing, my son isn't called Bartholomew because of a friend' son, and 8 months isn't too late to change.

@Curlylocks5 sorry only just realised some more people had commented but so glad I found your comment. It’s really helpful to hear from people who have actually gone through with making a change.... and comforting to know it was a positive outcome

@theotherfossilsister thanks for your comments.... it’s helpful to know we’re not the only ones that want the same name as friends lol. With regards to wondering what happened to his old name.... we were thinking of putting his current first name as his middle name and then if he decided he preferred it (although both names are “normal English” one lol) he’s still got that option there??

I'm pretty sure your friend will be happy you like her sons name and will not mind at all :)

Just change it.

It really pisses me off when people ‘Mark’ names. I am due a month before my sister and the name I chose for a boy that I had wanted for YEARS is apparently her dream name and she’s said that we can’t have it.

I’ve told her very frankly that my baby is due first and will be called whatever the f I want to call it. If she wants to call it the same then so be it but she’ll look like the doofus.

Imo it's fine unless the dc would be in the same year /class at school!!

Do what you want. If you need to explain it to the friend say you wanted to call your child that name in the first place, but didn't because you didn't want to offend them or whatever but you still love the name so much you want to change it and are not happy with the current name.

It would be strange people who were offended by such a thing btw.