Is this lame?

[tombliboozey]

So am due DC2 in the new year. Me and OH have names beginning with the same letter and were aware but didn't really think much of it when we had our DC1 and happened to like and give them a name beginning with the same letter.
Our friends and family found it a little amusing and in a nice way (doesn't bother us and find it quite endearing) have started to refer to our family collectively by the letter (trying not to put so as not to be too outing!).

So this has put a bit of added pressure when choosing a name this time. Both me and OH said we don't want it to completely dictate what name we choose and have names on our shortlist that do and don't begin with the letter but the one I'm probably leaning most to happens to begin with the letter again and OH is now saying he would rather choose a name that doesn't begin with the letter as he thinks it looks lame and a bit try hard.

So basically what are people's opinions on matching family names - is it ok or have the likes of the Kardashians and Dugger families made this really lame? Would you in our position be actively trying to avoid a name beginning with that letter or not?

I think now you’ve named DC1 that name you’re kind of committed! I know a family of four Bs who are known as ‘the four Bs’ to everyone - if their Dc2 hadn’t had a B name it would have been a bit weird! Like Laurence, Laura, Luna and Dave

It’s a little cheesy but tbh in your shoes I’d just commit to it now! Personally I’d have probably sidestepped the letter for DC1 but I accept that it’s a bit late for me to say that now 😂

Thanks. Yea that's kind of what I thought- feels a bit late now to undo! Think thats why I probably let myself get used to the name on our shortlist that begins with the letter.

Should also say this may be our last child- I'm not ruling out the possibility of one more but OH is pretty keen to stop at 2 so not sure then if this child would also feel left out without name beginning with that letter or if that's reading too much into it!

Personally I would avoid the same initial again if you can. I don't think it would be odd at all if this baby didn't have the same initial, I probably wouldn't really notice if they didn't but definitely would if they did and would probably assume it was intentional. However, if it is a name you absolutely love and none others come close then I would use the name - despite the same initial not because of it. It would be tricky if you had dc3 though!

I would use the same letter. I wouldn’t want the second child to feel left out.

I totally agree with @firebird83.

It’s a bit naff, but in some ways the ship has already sailed! What gave you got to lose if friends already joke about it? It would almost seem strange to have an odd name out now. If you genuinely love the name with the same letter too, then I say go for it. Equally if you are drawn to another name, go for that and don’t force the letter issue.

I would use a different letter this time. If you want you could give a middle name with the same letter, just as a nod to what's happened. I'd find all beginning with the same letter a bit odd.

DC2 will notice and feel left out if you don’t use the initial again.

I know a family of four who all have the initial J and AFAIK they rarely get comments, but perhaps this is because J names are quite common anyway.

You’re committed now! It would be stranger not to use the initial and I do agree with pp that DC2 would feel left out. In for a penny.

I really don't think it's a big deal and to NOT do it because of what other people think would be the lamest option of all.

Things like this depend on your personalities, if you are friendly and fun then it's just taken in that spirit.

I'd use the same letter again
I know it would feel really unbalanced to me not to have the other child have the same letter too.
Do you plan on having any more kids after this one? If this is your last one I personally think you have to use the same letter

I'm an only child. Me and my parents have the same initial, it's really no big deal, I don't remember anyone ever commenting on it ever and it's certainly not cringe. If I were DC2 with a different initial, I'd feel left out.

Oh no, please don't make the letter a theme. It makes me cringe. I am one of 4, parents and older sibling all have names starting with the same letter, and all have birthday's in the same month. I love the name they gave me and was grateful not to share initials. Let your new child be unique.

Personally, I don’t think the first letter theme is something I would notice all that much. I just realized I know sisters with names starting with S and yet it rarely crosses my mind.

Give DC2 a name you like and don’t feel beholden to any slight trend you’ve got so far. It’s the children’s names that will be in the spotlight most of the time. Now usually if a family has an obvious theme going on between the children, like a time period or they’ve already got two children with the same first initial, I’d say stick to it and don’t stray, but this your situation doesn’t require that standard since you don’t truly have a theme going on in my eyes. That’s my opinion anyway.

I know lots of families who now do this- I don’t really like the trend

I would avoid it mainly because it will cause confusion when they start receiving their own post. DD has the same initial as me and I nearly died when I accidentally opened her bank statement when she was a teenager and had about £3 in her account.

I'd do it. We inadvertently picked a middle name for DTwin1 that rhymed with DSs so I insisted we found one for DTwin2 . So like Matt, Nat and then desperately searching for a third one we liked

I'd avoid it this time. I have a cousin who was in the same position - he and his wife shared an initial and happened to give their first kid a name with the same, then carried it on with their next two kids. So all five of them share an initial. I find it incredibly cheesy (and I bet it's confusing as well, as other posters have mentioned).

If you give this kid a non-matching name you'll get a few comments about how you've broken the pattern or whatever, but then everyone will forget and bonus, you won't get friends making those "team X" comments going forward.

Oh, and I'm not sure I buy the "this kid will feel left out" view. I'd have been mortified by this as a kid and would have preferred to be the odd one out. But I suppose you don't know how your child will react!

I don’t think it matters tbh

I’m an M and my dd is an M, and all is my sister

I know one family who are
J mum
J dad
J oldest son
J youngest son
J daughter

I wouldn't do it. It's one thing to do it by accident with a name you love but imagine being wny subsequent children and knowing your parents didn't pick your name because they like it but instead because it fit into some arbitrary theme. I would think that's much worse than not having a matching name.

But op does like the name

The post situation would put me off if the dc are the same sex.

Thanks for all replies- bit mixed which is I guess how me and DH feel!
Yea I do like the matching name as well is actually probably my forerunner personally- though not sure how much has been me thinking about the name more because I knew it matched if that makes sense - I tend to need to let my baby names grow on me to get excited about them.

Would be different sexes which in a way if they were the same would have made life easier as is only really one maybe two more girl names I would consider with the letter so if had been a girl would have probs stayed away in case we decided to have another and it was a further girl! Boys names however there are quite a few I like beginning with the letter.

And this may be the last child at most one more (I'm still holding out that I can wear DH down for one more) but I guess there's always the risk of multiples!😳

Depends on the name and the letter.

Karl and Karen with DC Kolin and Khloe - just no, but Darren and Debbie with DC David and Daniella isn't too bad, although it does look a bit deliberate.

All quite 'normal' names (mine and OH have quite traditional names still very popular, my dd's name is slightly less common but still fairly traditional name and the one we're considering is in that same category maybe slightly more common) and definitely normal spellings- can't stand yoonique spellings!