No one can pronounce my baby's name!

[Bewilderbeastie]

Had my baby this year - decided upon a name which is definitely not common but (we thought) really not difficult. It's very short, two syllables, no special characters, nothing odd about how you pronounce it (it's very say what you see).

We both saw it, loved it, didn't consider people would she trouble with it... But they do! I've heard every wrong iteration of it. Even when we say what the correct pronunciation is, people continue to struggle?! We've been witnessing this with growing horror and worried now we've saddled our child with a name that will haunt them for life. Every time I hear someone say it wrong, I cringe inside. I can only imagine what it's going to be like for my LO.

It can be shortened even further, so that's an option. But it's not the name we fell in love with.

Any tips on dealing with this? Both my husband and I have very trad names so never had this ourselves. It gets a bit awkward to keep correcting people... Help!

Hmm hard to say without knowing the name but options are

a) get in there first with pronunciation (this is my son - Vilhelm, or if written down (ie Facebook announcement) Willhem was born today (pronounced Vilhelm) all happy and healthy etc

b) Correct the person once “oh actually it’s pronounced Vilhelm :)” and assume they won’t do it again

Sometimes the easiest names to pronounce are pronounced wrongly and need to be corrected so it’s not necessarily a reflection on poor name choice. If it suits him, go for it

What's the name?
It's funny and annoying how the same spelling gets different pronunciations - I used to work with a Leah (Lee-uh) who used to get called Lay-err at lot.
Also, I'd say Mia like Mee-ah, but some would pronounce it My-ah.

Well, seems like you have a few options here. Learn to deal with it and continue correcting and in turn have LO have to spend life doing that too, shorten it or change it completely. Not much else I can offer I'm afraid.

I've a name that's not common these days and quite uncommon outside of the small area it hails from, then has unique spelling to top it off and I can tell you that it's been the bane of my existence. I Iove the way the spelling looks but I hate having to constantly repeat myself

As someone who's name is almost always mispronounced, I would say don't stress. It was annoying when I was younger but as I got older I really liked/like having an unusual name. I also worked out that it was a good dickhead barometer. Mine is also 2 syllables and very easy once you know how. People who completely refuse to even try and say it correctly once I (very nicely) correct them, tell me everything I need to know about them.

It must only be when people see it written down and try to pronounce it for the first time? I mean, once you or your child (when older) have introduced themselves with the correct pronunciation then it's fine?
I don't think this is going to be a huge problem in the future.

My friend called her daughter Edie (pronounced ee- dee) and does get rather annoyed with health visitors, the doctor or her nursery when they read it and call her Eddie.
It happens a lot but you just have to correct them once I suppose.

There’s loads of names which can and are pronounced in different ways, i’d totally understand people maybe guessing and sayinf it differently to how you do if they’re new to meeting you/your child. Its very ignorant if people are still saying it wrong when you’ve told them how you pronounce it! I have a name which people pronounce differently all the time and honestly it’s not bothered me, I just correct people if they get it wrong, then again if they get it wrong again. Once I’ve told them, if they do it again it’s more embarrassing for them than me id say! Don’t let other people’s ignorance make you feel differently about a name you love, people who are close to your family and those who will be close to your child will make sure they are saying it correctly

Given that people even get a simple and popular name like Edie wrong, it's not necessarily the name.

What is the name?

Is it something like Elena, where you want to say it Ellen-ah but get Elaina or Elenna, and would need to stick to Ellie?

Perhaps if you tell us the name, people can offer more helpful advice? Is there a reason for not saying what it is on here?

Thanks all for repsonses. I know it's annoying not to just say the name, obviously it's quite outing (as it's really not common) and a few people I know are on here. I mostly wanted to hear from those who've either been in a similar position with their own name, or their child's name. I can't help thinking we've done something awful!

However very good points about lots of 'common' names being mispronounced too. I guess we just worry because even when we correct people (out loud, even saything things like 'X, rhymes with Y') they STILL mispronounce it. Baffling. I guess it's just a new word to them and they find it hard. It's just really surprised us...

My mil has been mispronouncing my daughters name since she was born. I correct her every time.
My daughter is 3.5!

My daughter has a similar name, we aren’t bothered by mis pronunciation really. Why is it so cringy? What’s so bad??

It's because people don't have an 'anchor' in their brain for it. Sadly, this happens a lot with unusual names. I wish I'd had a more recognisable name - also annoying having to spell my email out every single time!

It can be shortened even further, so that's an option. But it's not the name we fell in love with.

I saw on an 'Irish name' thread where a poster had given her DD a welsh name and she insisted that everyone could say it perfectly, but it turned out that those who couldn't say it was using an abbreviation.

She might as well have given the child two names.

Every time I hear someone say it wrong, I cringe inside. I can only imagine what it's going to be like for my LO.
I've posted about this many a time, and always get shot down in flames.

Honestly, change it. Use the name you love as a middle name.

My name is Lorna and I've been called Laura or Lauren all my life. It's just one of those things.
The people that know and love your child will get their name right and that's all that matters.

@Queenfreak yep, MIL still struggles over here

@Twickerhun I guess because the mispronunciations all sound quite horrible and the actual name is lovely... And every time it happens I feel sad again for her that she might have to do this for the rest of her life

I can see why you can't say the name, but could you give an example of something similar, or say what it rhymes with?

@AiryFairyMum yes you're right, there's no anchor. Some people just can't seem to grasp it.

Another thing - masks DEFINITELY don't help as people can't read my lips. When we're at the GPs or in a shop, I end up having to say it over and over and eventually spell it out. Hopefully that's a short lived problem, though...

If it’s affecting you very badly don’t forget you can change the name legally up to 1 year old on birth certificate without much bother. You just fill in a form, costs around £40 where I am, I know someone who has done this.

Without knowing the name it’s impossible to say really, but I think mispronunciation is rife with a lot of names, if not for being unusual then for accent variations. But if you’ve chosen something like Saoirse then I think you need to be prepared for more of this.

@MummaLaw yes, we've considered changing it. We really don't want to as it's very special to us, it's the name we have our first child together. But perhaps that's selfish. Maybe a good plan is to stick with it for s few more months and see how we go. Because of lockdown/Covid we haven't been meeting as many new people as we might have done usually, so haven't tested it out much.

My 2 year has a name a lot of people struggle with. There are it turns out multiple pronoucations, most of which I find ugly. I correct and smile on repeat.

YY to the hook. Give people a rhymes with word, especially one that is a little bit funny. People will remember.

Helena Bonham Carter has a great line here demonstrating it about 20secs into the clip

@MikeUniformMike hmm... Maybe a good example is something like 'Evelyn'.

@Dinosauratemydaffodils yes I think I have to just get used to it and keep smiling...

@TorkTorkBam this is a good idea. Will think on it!