Help a new mummy out !!!

[Abbiegriffiths]

So I'm really struggling with names !!!

My surname is ( griffiths )
My boyfriends surname is ( Barclay-evely )

Hence why we can't double barrel our surnames. 😢

So we decided our little boy would have my surname but we would change his surname when/ if we get married so our boys name needs to go with both our surnames .

We both originally liked the name max 🥰
That's really stuck with my boyfriend but me being me I keep changing my mind .
I would happily have max as his name but I normally like unusual names so we thought of having a name I originally like as his middle name but struggling to find one that fits both our surnames . I really like the names :

Finley
Harley
Cody
Leo
Flynn
Iv been trying to persuade my boyfriend to have max as a middle name but he's having none of it 😂😂

But I'm so stuck on what to use . Help me out 😴😴 would consider any other/new suggestions xoxox Tia xxx

I'd go with Max. Lovely name. Although I'd call him Maximus but that's because I have a crush on Russell Crowd.

And for the petty comment about me calling myself a mummy . I am a mummy so what exactly is your problem??

On MN there are a lot of people who hate terms like 'mummy' and 'hun'. Unfortunately if you use terms like that on here a few people will usually pick up on it and have a go.

Crowe not Crowd 🙄

I don’t think your list is unusual at all, I know no baby Maxs and LOADS of Finleys and Leos. If you want an unusual name you need a new list. Love the name Max though and congratulations!

It’s totally understandable that your bf wants his surname represented too but you’re being entirely sensible and wise to keep your surname in there too.

If anyone tries to tell you or pressure you into ditching yours as it’s ‘traditional ’ for babies to have their dads name, remind them that it isn’t.

Baby’s always have their mothers surname, it’s just traditionally those mothers were either married to the father first and had changed / double barrelled there surname.

OR they were shunned for being unmarried mothers and their children were obviously “illegitimate” due to their name.

As I said previously as soon as the baby is born the hospital will write his tags / notes as Baby Griffiths because that will be his name to match yours for identification purposes.

Speak to your boyfriend and say you’re happy to add one of his surnames on so which one does he prefer?
Or do what my cousin did when pregnant at 17 and use his surname as a middle name, in her case the dads surname was Kelly and they had a girl so it worked well for a middle name.
Unfortunately they didn’t stay together but both are still good parents.

Max Barclay Griffiths sounds great IMO

Did someone really just comment that the OP shouldn’t call herself mummy but instead use mother or mum?! 😂 are they serious?! I don’t know anyone with a child under 4 who isn’t a mummy!

Ps. Max is a lovely name!

I think the idea is that our children call us "Mummy" but we don't call or refer to ourselves as Mummy when we're talking to other adults. For example DS (aged 2) calls me Mummy and DH also refers to me as Mummy when he is talking to DS. But in any other context and especially when talking to adults I say "I'm a mum" or "I'm DS's mum".

Completely irrelevant to the choice of name though!

I think it's because very few adults call their mother mummy. It's a very infantilised way of speaking. For example you seldom see a thread on here saying shall I go no contact with my mummy, or what will I buy my mummy for her birthday, or should I let my mummy move in with us.

As such, in adult conversation, most people refer to themselves as mum, mother, parent. Seldom do they refer to themselves as mummy when no kids are present and it's adult conversation.

My godson is Max (Maxwell) he's gorgeous! Maybe I'm biased but the name is a really good boys name.

As for 'mummy' my friend calls me his godmummy... which is lovely as I'll not have a child of my own now so won't be a 'proper' mummy.

I've personally prefer mum but my friend is very posh so still says mummy at age 35 bless her.

As for the other names I like Flynn & Finley

I really like Max. And Leo. And if you want to refer to yourself as mummy then ignore the daft comments on here and go ahead.

Other ideas:
Marcus
Anton
Miles
Giles
Ethan
Alexander (nn Sacha, Sandy, Xander, Lex, Alex, Xand. Lots of choice for abbreviations)

Love your choice of names. I think it’s a good idea to give the baby your surname too. I would steer clear of the names ending in a Y as if you do change his name in future all his names would end in the same sound.