Changing our Child's name at age 5?

[NorwichDad]

I am after some advice about changing our child's legal name please.

His official first and middle names are Theodore Edward. Since the moment of his birth we have called him Teddy.

This was always our plan as we thought if he wanted to be a brain surgeon, Dr Theodore might be preferable to Dr Teddy. We wanted to give him flexibility, he could be Theo, Theodore, Ted, Teddy, whatever he wanted basically.

At school and nursery he is/was known as Teddy and other than the odd person who doesn't know him well, this is all he's ever been called.

He identifies 100% as Teddy and is very adamant that Teddy is his "Real" name and only occasionally concedes Theodore is his "Long" name, usually only after much discussion. He refuses to learn how to spell or write it.

Whenever i call him Theodore or hear someone call him Theo, it almost physically makes me cringe.

My wife and i have discussed changing his name by deed poll to Teddy to make his life simpler and consolidate his sense of identity however, we're on the fence whether to do it now or leave it up to him when he's older.

What's your thoughts please?

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Thanks for taking the time to reply guys.

Some of the comments and messages were really helpful.

I think in our hearts we want to make the change but we worried how things would be perceived by others and with 98% of comments & messages telling us to leave it we'll certainly be thinking long and hard before making any changes.

Some of the comments made me proper lol too.

Follow your hearts and gut instincts.
I made a change for my child and I haven’t looked back , people didn’t necessary agree with my change.i had to do it for my own peace of mind and emotions towards my child’s name. It’s yours and your family choice x

My 7 year old has a shortened name, he is always called by this. At five (and prior to this) he rejected his big name and refused to acknowledge it. Now at seven he recognises he has a big name even though he's never called by it. It is just a more mature understanding that your son isn't ready for yet!

@TurningAroundTheBush Tell that to James James Bond ;)

Do you know any 40yo men named Teddy on their birth certificate? You might as well change his name to Poohbear. It makes no sense.

Defo don't change it. He feels this way now but may not in the future. My name is longer than what I'm called but it certainly doesn't make me cringe if a dr calls out my proper name etc. it's just not a big deal certainly not worth changing.

Is that why you did it? Genuine question. Did you not realise when you named him and then nicknamed him you were doubling up his name?

Leave it. As a baby DS was definitely Sammy. The. He was definitely Sam fur a few years. Age 11 he is now definitely Samuel.

Did you realise that Teddy is short for both Edward and Theodor? If you intend to keep Edward as a legal middle name then definitely don't change his first name as Teddy Edward sounds ridiculous.

Also as PP's have mentioned, Teddy might seem great on a five year old but he might not like being Teddy as an older teen. It's a bit cutesy

Ds1 insisted on being called Virgil Tracey when he was 5. He really wouldn't have thanked us in later life for formally changing his name.

God no, the teenage Theodore will thank you for leaving it.

Leave it but stop arguing with him about his full name. He is 5 and he's called Teddy, if someone else calls him Theo or Theodore just explain that he has a grown up name for when he's a grown up but for now he is Teddy.

@SparrowBo I was wondering when someone would mention him

FWIW I don’t think naming a child Theodore Edward is doubling up a name, they just share a nickname. But Teddy isn’t a compulsory shortening of Edward. When I wasn’t younger they were all called Ed.

Was younger!

I wouldn’t, you never know how he’ll feel about it when he’s older. The more options the better.

My full name is Elizabeth but I’ve been called Beth my whole life. As a child I used to get cross if someone called me Elizabeth but these days I quite like it! It also makes me harder to google/find on social media which is only a good thing these days, I think

He won't want to fill out job applications as teddy... He's 5. If he still wants it changed in 10 years do it, but I highly doubt he will.

I would just leave it. I really don't think it will "consolidate his sense of identity". I'm not even sure what that means 😂

Teddy is very much his "real" name as that's what he's known by. He also has a "full name" though. He may well be happy that he's got another name to pick as he gets older.

I've always been known by my middle name (for reasons i don't quite understand ) and I knew my "real" name was X Y but my "known by" name was Y.

Definitely don't change it!
Lots of kids have shortened versions of their first names.

My name is Katharine, I get called Katy. I never used Katharine as a child but knew it was my 'long name'. I like being able to use Katharine as an adult now. My identity wasn't mixed up as a child

Also Teddy Edward is just silly, sorry.

Also I'm not even sure you can change a 5 year olds name by deed poll. I thought it was before 1 or when they're 16??

Leave it. My dd is Eleanor. Hated it from the off. Known has Ella her whole life. Some friends and family didn't even know that wasn't her official name. At 13 she know considers Ella a bit young and loves her longer name and the choice it gives her.

Might also mention that when she started secondary school there was a part on a form to write her preferred name and that name (not official name) is everywhere. The registers, class lists, books certificates. You would never know she even had a different name. Your ds is only 5. I think he will love the choice later. Don't take his options away. While Teddy is nice he is left with Ted later then life if he wants a different feel. Theodore is so much better!!

Definitely don't change it - he's 5! Kids are notoriously fickle. If he really wants to change it when he's older, he can. In the meantime, having a longer name shouldn't really affect him.

My fathers name was Edward, family called him Teddy as a child, as an adult he would not have wanted this when applying for jobs, it was just a family nickname endearment. My DS had a family nickname was not used in his professional life.

I think you need to have a “Name Reveal” party complete with present list inventory from Debenhams, cake smash and explain to people that although he currently “identifies as Teddy” he is in fact “Theodore fluid” and deserves the right to be called Teddy/Ted/Theo/Theodore/Ed/Eddy/Edward/Ted Theodore Logan depending on how he feels

I would leave it. My LO is known by a shortened version of his unusual first name. I love both names and the fact he is free to use either his every day name and his Sunday name.

I know a boy called Teddie, when he was about 9/10 he really started to feel embarrassed by his name and asked his parents why they hadn’t given him a ‘normal’ name like Adam or James!

Keep his name as it is so he has options later.