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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

2 babies within family, similar names

54 replies

HmmGrey · 01/07/2019 19:28

Using replacement names:

I’ve just had a baby and throughout my pregnancy only liked the name “Mia”. Over the duration of my pregnancy, I realised the name was more popular than I would’ve liked so started looking again. I found the name “Ria” after looking long and hard. Hadn’t thought about looking at the name starting with a different letter before. After coming up with nothing else, I thought amazing, it’s meant to be.

I told my sister and that’s when I realised it sounds like the name she has chosen for her baby “Reena” She feels it too similar and that she wouldn’t name her baby “Reena” if I go chose “Ria”

I’m absolutely gutted. I can’t find anything else I like and I’ve searched and searched. I thought I had found the perfect name and I feel like it’s the baby’s name. I don’t want her to have to give up the name she’s chosen.

What do I do?

OP posts:

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Original poster

HmmGrey · 01/07/2019 20:23

Just had a search on a popular baby name website and the common name is in the top 30 and the uncommon name is just within the top 1000. On some websites it’s top 10. When people asked (during my pregnancy) if I had any names in mind, I’d say the name and I frequently received responses like:

‘My niece is called Mia’
‘My friends daughter is called Mia’
‘I called my daughter Mia’

And that put me off further

OP posts:

AshesOfEden · 01/07/2019 20:27

I like Ria. A friend at school spelled it Rea, although (not to put you off) she was the butt of a few jokes with people calling her diarrhea..

jpclarke · 01/07/2019 20:28

What about Nessa? I would spell Rhea too not Ria.

Original poster

HmmGrey · 01/07/2019 20:29

@GrapefruitIsGross

That’s the problem. We’re best friends and we spend as much time together as possible. I really don’t want to put her out. I wouldn’t usually consider something like this usually but I feel so strongly that it’s my baby’s name.

OP posts:

hopefullyhelpfully · 01/07/2019 20:32

Thea? That's a lovely name.

icecreamsundae32 · 01/07/2019 20:39

Why only Mia or Ria?

I prefer Mia of the two! And I think Ria is too close to Reena for cousins so close in age and as you say you are close to your sister.

As others have suggested Tia, Leah, Thea? Even Aria??

underthebridgedowntown · 01/07/2019 20:43

OP you've really confused people by not using the actual names!

Go for the common one that was your first choice and you loved. Why do you need an uncommon name?

Matleavemadam · 01/07/2019 20:45

I think its hard to come up with alternatives for you when we don't know the actual names. So I guess if there is absolutely no other name out there that you like you're just gonna have to go with Ria as you've had you're baby first and you're sister will just have to get over it

Original poster

HmmGrey · 01/07/2019 20:47

Couldn’t use the actual names because it’s outing and my sister is on mumsnet too.

I don’t like common names. Don’t want my child to be one of many in their class/year. All my brothers and sisters have unusual names so I’ve grown up wanting the same for my own.

OP posts:

MondeoFan · 01/07/2019 20:50

Everyone going on about whether they like Mia, Ria etc and none of them are even the actual names 😂

Matleavemadam · 01/07/2019 20:52

What other names are there that you sort of like or what style? Maybe we can find you something...I know you've looked but you never know. How old is your baby and what have you been calling her so far...or just been calling her 'the baby'?

MmeBufo · 01/07/2019 20:59

Gosh, you've backed yourself into a corner with this then op. You have 3 options to choose from:

Use your original choice but be unhappy about it being more popular than you'd like
Use your second choice and be unhappy with the tension with your sister and the similarity between the names
Choose a new name despite really not wanting too

None is ideal but it is what it is. TBH I'd go with option 3 and use my much loved first choice as a middle name.

andthentherewere · 01/07/2019 21:02

I think it's probably quite an outing thread anyway from what you have already said so maybe more helpful to you to post the actual names so you get some more relevant opinions and maybe even ideas?
Did your sister know you were planning to go for Mia/Ria before now?

TerribleTwosPhase · 01/07/2019 21:09

This happened with me and my sister and we were both pregnant with girls due within 4 weeks of each other. She wanted a name very similar to a name I had picked and we both agreed they were very similar, and she picked another name so I can understand your sister thinking that they are very similar and being hesitatant for you both to use the names. However if you really really don't like anything else don't chose something else just for the sake of it then regret it. Does your sister not have any other ideas she can use? Who picked their name first?

BarryBarryTaylor · 01/07/2019 21:35

There must be other names that you like...can you give us a clue as to what your tastes are so that we can suggest something? MN was instrumental in helping me find a name!

diddlediddle · 01/07/2019 21:45

Your sister will surely be able to recognise your situation from this post even without the names!

The PP who outlined the 3 options is very helpful. These really are your only options (aside from you both rechoosing).

Which one are you going to pick?

I personally think you should both just go ahead and pick the names you like and if they are similar then who really cares. People will forget about it, the kids will have their own characters and possibly their own nicknames, it will be a funny story etc. You both chose them independently at the same time so there's not a clear answer as to who should "win". Any other solution will leave someone feeling disgruntled for life!

Fatkins · 01/07/2019 21:47

Oh this is a tricky one...

On the one hand, why would you let something like your second choice name come between you and your sister? It's just a name. But then she isn't being terribly gracious. Many people would have quietly changed their name choice without mentioning, seeing as your DD is already here. Seems to be a bit of territorialness on both sides, which I understand.

Sorry, that's really unhelpful!

Fatkins · 01/07/2019 21:49

Fwiw though, I know sisters named Melanie and Melissa. Nobody bats an eyelid.

LL83 · 01/07/2019 21:55

Mia is used a lot in your opinion (I only know one Mia, in dds class have never met or heard of another) or upset your sister. It is unreasonable of her to be upset.

My choice would be use my original choice Mia.

Boy in our street has lovely and unusual name. His new neighbour moved in, boy same age and same name. You could miss out on Mia, annoy your sister and still not have the only Ria in the school.

Owlbert · 01/07/2019 22:02

If you knew your sister's choice was 'Reena' before you gave birth and your sister was 100% set on the name with no alternatives I would not use 'Ria'.
If your sister had not been pregnant at the same time as you I would have said go for it!
I think your sister will hold it against you if you choose 'Ria' and she has to change her chosen name (she would have to or it would look like and people would constantly assume she was the copycat rather than you) then I don't think your close relationship would ever quite be the same.
If I were you I would go back to the drawing board!

TheBrilloPad · 01/07/2019 22:11

A lot of people seem to have missed that Mia/Ria aren't the names. It's just any popular combo. Could be Sienna/Brienna etc etc.

I agree with @Owlbert. When you decided on "Ria", did you know that "Reena" was your sisters only choice for a girl? If so, I don't think you can use "Ria". Either go with "Mia" or name change and post the real names on the baby name board and I guarantee people will come up with similar names you haven't thought of

Fatkins · 01/07/2019 22:25

Oh hang on, did you know her choice was 'Reena' before you changed your name from 'Mia' to 'Ria'? That definitely changes things.

ineedtostopbeingsolazy · 01/07/2019 22:49

Choose another name.

ineedtostopbeingsolazy · 01/07/2019 22:53

Your dd isn't even called 'Ria' yet and it's causing problems.
Down the line you may regret calling her that name.

Pieceofpurplesky · 01/07/2019 23:11

Nobody can help unless we know the names. If your sister reads the thread she will know anyway.
Just call DD something you like

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