Lakshmana for a girl and nicknames?

[halseyismyname123]

I am 22 weeks pregnant with DC3 with my fiancé. I have 2 older DC's (DD 16 and DS3) from a previous relationship. My last DH was Irish and they have very Irish names. My soon to be DH is of Indian decent, though he doesn't really appear it (both parents are half white half indian), he wanted to pick an Indian sounding name for our DC.

We had Jasmine picked out for a girl and Sai for a boy. However, at 2 weeks ago we discovered DC was a girl and DF said he had gone off the name Jasmine as he has seen a lot of them about, and has decided he likes Lakshmana. Pronounced "lock" "shmar" "na". It's a traditional Indian boys name but he claims it can be used for a girl. I wasn't keen at first but it has grown on me. However I think it's a bit "extra" for DD2 to have growing up. I keep having visions of the suppy teacher at school not being able to pronounce it and friends asking about it. Also made worse with the fact that she'll probably appear very caucasian, what with me being white and DH being 7/8ths white. I'm worried people will judge us as "stealing" the name from another culture.

I've decided either I register her as Lakshmana and find a suitable nickname to use day to day OR name her Jasmine Lakshmana Lastname. I have been unable to find a nickname, so does anyone here have any ideas? Thank you.

Agree with your DH Jasmine is very ubiquitous now.

I would go with Lakshana instead of Lakshmana.

Lakshana means good-featured or pleasing to look at. Can be shortened to Laksha or even Lucky

It sounds like a girl’s name to us, as we’re used to girls’ names ending in -a. But won’t a billion Indian people find it a bit odd ?

Also, be prepared for assumptions she’s Hindu (Laxmi)

NN could be Manna, Minnie

I don’t think anyone would think it’s stealing a cultural name, for her only being 1/8 Indian. It’s nice.

Don’t forget names are significant labels. An obviously Indian name is a lifetime of assumption or at least questions about her Indian-ness. Be sure you’re ready for that. It can come as a shock if you’re not.

What about a name that works for both cultures?

e.g. Tara, Nina or Anita?

More suggestions on this thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/baby_names/616968-indian-irish-names

Why a boy's name? Lakshmi is lovely and Shmi is a cute NN while Mimi could also be a slightly more grown up NN.

I love the girl names similar to Lakshmana mentioned here, thank you. The only issue is I asked DH about one of them and he seems to have his mind set on Lakshmana.

I think having the "m" removed in Lakshana makes all of the difference really. Lakshi is gorgeous as well. Might have to put my foot down. I think I may have to try and convince him that DD might object to having a boys name as a teenager!

Lakshmi I mean, not Lakshi! Thank you MrsTerryPratchett

My DH is fully Indian (lived in India all his life, family still there, just working abroad) and I was worried about using a very Indian sounding name on a mixed race child - I didn't do it in the end as I thought it would just seem weird. There are some names which would work on a mixed race child and some names which just wouldn't and in my opinion the name you have chosen
wouldnt. It is VERY Indian and doesn't work very well in English and I'd be reluctant to use it personally. If your daughter will be only 1/8 Indian then I don't think it's ready suitable to use such an Indian name, especially an Indian boys name, as like a PP said, she'd have to spend her whole life explaining the name choice and her heritage. It seems like a very odd choice which would cause her pronunciation problems and raised eyebrows in the UK (just being honest, I do think people would be a bit about it) and like a pp said, Indians would find it odd (DH said it's a boys name, maybe it's not when your DHs family is from but at least where my DH is from it is not a girl's name, and in my experience the whole gender neutral thing isn't big in India and Indians WOULD find it odd for a little girl to have a little boys name. If you're intent on using an Indian name maybe go for something more neutral like Priya which sounds OK in English or Luxmi which is easy to say and can be shortened to Lux which I've always thought is cool. I'm sorry to give a negative reaction and I'm only saying this as I wanted honest feedback (when I was in a similar situation). I really don't think the name is a good idea in either England or India - I wouldn't name my half Indian daughter something like this, let alone a 1/8 Indian daughter, especially as it's a boys name. If you do want an Indian name choose 1) a girl's name and 2) a name which works well in both countries and seems less OTT and 3) sounds less odd next to two Irish names (might not be very nice for your daughter to feel so obviously different/maybe a bit left out?)

And also the cultural appropriation thing is a very hot topic at the moment (cringe at saying hot topic! But it is) and I do think you and your daughter might be frowned on for people thinking you've stolen the name from a culture you're not linked to..it's not fair that people judge other people's heritage based on their skin colour but they do both you and your daughter will be subject to a lifetime of explaining and justifying yourselves

I’m Indian. I’m Hindu. Unless you or your DH is religious I wouldn’t use Lakshman / Laxman/ Laxmana / Lakshmana for a girl. He was the Lord Rama’s brother in the Ramayana and a really important figure in mythology and the name may piss off the Indian / Hindu sides of your DH’s families (they may even refuse to use it and create a nickname). The appropriate feminine version is Laxmi / Lakshmi which a actually means fortune and wealth (the birth of girls is believed to portend great wealth and riches in Hindu cultures) and while also a Goddess’ name, is considered far more appropriate in daily use.

If you are religious it’s often considered okay to use deeply religious, inappropriately gendered names in some Hindu cultures. Names are considered vital in the passage of the soul to the afterlife and so often people who yearn for kids make maantas (promises or sacrifices) to a specific god that if they have a boy or girl they will name their child after it. That’s why you can get male Laxmi’s (girl’s name) and female Krishna’s. But you would be really looked down upon if you did this without the religious connection.

To be honest, I'm white British and my first reaction was "but that's a boy's name". We did read the Ramayana at school though. Lakshmana is a very obviously male, masculine character, so meeting a girl with the name would probably throw me for a second, although then I would probably just wonder if maybe the name was actually unisex in India and I just hadn't been aware of it before.

As pp have mentioned, there is a Hindu goddess called Lakshmi, which I've always thought was a lovely name.

Go with Lakshmi.

Lakshmana is a boy and a boy’s name. Never ever in my life have I heard of a girl with that name. And I am Indian and nominally Hindu. It’s like insisting Johnny is a girl’s name because it ends in ‘y’ like Emily and Betty and calling a girl that. Please don’t.

It’s defintiely a boy’s name and would really sound odd for a girl sorry. Lakshmi is nice and has lots of nickname potential. It was my grandmother’s name.

I was going to suggest Lakshmi too. Such a pretty name. You’re the one risking your health to carry the child so you get last word.

I think it's lovely to give your daughter an Indian name op.

Ignore completely those people who think it's odd - they are the odd ones!

My BIL comes from a Sikh background and they have their girls Cor (meaning lioness) as middle makes. Which is a really lovely nod to their heritage IMO

Congrats on your baby

So your kids all have names based on their fathers’ ethnicity? Very Irish and then very Indian names? Will they all have their respective fathers’ surnames?
I have multicultural kids and have chosen names that work across both cultures. And they have both surnames.

It feels a bit odd to brand your family according to each father.

But Lakshmi rather than the other names.
I have SILs called Lakshmi.
Not that they are ever called it, all the Indian family members I know have alternative everyday names.

Do you like any of these names OP? I don't think they are hard to say with an English tongue:

Layla
Rhea
Ananya
Jaya
Kaia
Laranya
Milana
Priya
Taara
Niya

@JillScarlet - I agree lol. If this were me I’d just the Hindu names that overlap with Gaelic ones rather than an inappropriate religious one. Ameya, Neeva etc

@SmiledWithTheRisingSun - if your bil is sikh that using Kaur as a middle name for girls, and Singh as a middle name for boys, is a religious requirement of both the Sikh culture and religion. What OP is doing is different because her OH isn’t religious.

I've managed to get DH to understand that Lakshmana is a bit heavy for a majority white British baby and I'm also not keen on the boy aspect.

He seems to have come around to Lakshmi and we will call her Mia as a nickname as that will go well my other DC's Irish name while still respecting DH's wish for an Indian name.

Sounds like a great compromise!

Cherries BIL is Sikh by birth but not practising.

Perfect - both Lakshmi and Mia are great names :)