Help - we cannot name our baby

[Sranso]

Hi mumsnet! All I seem to post about on here is our struggles with naming our baby, but these forums are always good for some sage advice.

We know we're having a girl and DW is now 37wks so we're entering the end game . I'm looking for any advice on how we can break the deadlock - drawing straws or an elaborate voting system for example!

One of the main issues is that a lot of the names we can agree on, we either can't agree on a short or long form. We like Charlotte, but DW doesn't like Lottie and I don't like Charlie. We like Isobel, but DW doesn't like Isy/Izzy and I don't like Bel. We both like Edie, but DW doesn't want to put Edith on birth certificate, but I would want to. You get the picture!

Any advice gratefully received.

If you like Charlotte or Isabel, then call her one of those. You don't have to have a nickname. My DC don't have nicknames - their names don't easily shorten to anything. They're called by their full names.

I don't understand this need to choose nicknames?

My children have short but three syllable names and are called by their full names, no nicknames. We had them when babies but none stuck.

Caroline is another version of Charlotte. Carrie is nice.

If you love Charlotte or Isobel just use it and correct anyone who attempts to nickname her.
Edie is a name in its own right, it wouldn’t have to be Edith on the BC.

I'm not asking for debate over whether you need a nickname (or shortening more precisely), it's just something we know from experience that we will end up doing. So there's no point calling her Charlotte and knowing that I'll be calling her Lottie within the month and infuriating DW.

It's more tips I'm looking for how we find new names or narrow down preferences, rather than opinions on the names I've mentioned.

We're not good at this!!

Edie is a pet form of Edith too! I'm just a bit oif a stick in the mud about these things. We'd've had the same issue with Max had she been a boy!

I don't think Charlotte is lends itself automatically to a shortened version... I know 3 different ones and all are known as Charlottes.
But if you want a similar name you can shorten, his about the Italian version, Carlotta. Shorten to Carla?

I know four Charlotte's, only one is known as Charlie, the others (all adults) go by Charlotte.

Most of the Charlotte's I know go by their full name. In general Lottie is a recent popular nn, I don't know any adult Lotties but know 5 under 3.

Charlotte is lovely on its own.

If you can't agree on any you've already discussed you just need to keep going through the baby name lists til you can!

Don’t try and agree on a nn because from experience they develop especially once dc starts school. My dd is Imogen we used to call her immy once she started school she didn’t like it (sounded too much like Amy who was her best friend). So we started using Imogen and as she got older her friends call her idgy.

Elodie and call her Edie as her nickname.

Or you could call her Astrid which is my all time favourite name but DP wouldn't let me call DD that. You may of course not like it.

Can you explain why if you like Edie you would put Edith on the birth certificate when it is a different name?

Put nicknames out of the equation.

If they happen let it be from friends in the future.

Choose one name you will both be happy to use in the near future.

I used / still use on occasion pet names for my children that have very little to do with their given names. But I refer to them generally by their given names. I wouldn't have wanted a Charlotte becoming Lottie to one parent only. Your right that that does not work well.

Write lists and swap lists would be my way. Noone is allowed down the nicknames rabbit hole..

I agree that names do not have to have a nn.
However like it or not upu.don't really get much control over it. You may not like a potential nn but they might do.
I had a friend Jennifer and her mum wouldn't have her called anything but that even way in to her teens
In the end she just said. "Mum its my name"

Eden NN Edie
Charlotte NN Lotta?
Tbh most charlottes I know are known by full name
Isobel doesn’t need to be shortened either but Isabella is nice and so is Bella.
Are there any other names in the mix. If I had another DD I’d like Kitty (with no full name)

The nickname will usually be given at a school by friends, out of your control so I can understand why you're thinking so much about a nickname. Hope you agree on something soon!

"You're right"

Eden nn Edie

@ZebraKid71 -I feared it would be back to the lists

@tinty, I like the Elodie idea actually.

@AssassinatedBeauty because it's a derivative as mentioned above.

Also, as I said above, I don't consider that a nickname, it's a shortening or derivative of their name. Going by our DD1, we know we will want to do this. So I'm not asking for debate on that as such, but more tips/experience of ending a really tortuous process!

Just a few off the top of my head....

Olivia nn Livvy

Esther nn Essie

Victoria nn Vicky

Jennifer nn Jenny/Jenna/Jen

Juliet nn Jules

Elizabeth nn Beth or Libby or Lizzy

Felicity nn Fliss

Eden nn Edie

Beatrice nn Bea

Margaret nn Peggy

Write down the full name and derivative. If you don't like both it's off the list.

For the purposes of your lists Name = Name + Derivative.

You are wasting effort on these derivatives you don't agree on.

So you are ruling out all names that are, or you feel you would treat, as a short version or derivative of another name?

Astoria nn Stori