Can we use the same name for our son as a friend?

[KitKat16]

Opinions please.

My DH and I are expecting our second child. With our first we didn't know what we were having so decided on the name Kaitlyn for a girl and Jacob for a boy and ended up having a girl. This time round we have found out we're having a boy. We still love the name Jacob however my friend has called her son Jacob since then. We're close friends but I don't see my friend very often (due to work schedules) and I've only met her son once since he was born last year. Do you think we can still use this name for our son or not?

I wouldn’t but it’s really up to you.

You definitely can. It’s a popular name and she will surely be expecting to meet other little Jacobs. No one owns a name and all that.

However, I’d personally look for something else since it’s a close friend. There are so many great names out there. How do you feel about Joseph?

If you still love it then I would. It’s not like you’re copying them, it’s a traditional, classic name and you don’t see her in person very often so it’s hardly going to cause confusion.

When you announce the name just make sure you lightheartedly point out that it’s been your ‘boy name’ since you were pregnant with your DD and that clearly you both have exceptional taste!

You can but I wouldn't. There are so many names to choose from that it would be nice if your son didn't have to share his name with your friend's son. Names are given to identity a person.

Of course you can - and should, if you really like the name.

As Eleanor90 said, there will be other Jacobs around, and lots of people happen to like the same name! If it were your sister, that would be a bit different.

One of my friends had a little girl the year after my DD was born, she used the same name for her little girl that we used for ours. I didn't really mind tbh. But we're not mega close, like you I've only seen her little girl once in the last 18 months so it's no big deal.

Not sure how I'd have felt if she was a really close friend who I saw more frequently though.

I personally wouldn't but it's up to you. Do you have mutual friends? That would make it even more awkward

I think it's fine, but if you're worried, have a chat with her about it,

We used the same name as a friend, their Dd is 14 though and they have recently moved to another country so the girls are unlikely to ever really see each other, apart from the odd fleeting visit.

We spoke to my friend beforehand and explained that if it was a girl we would like to use her DD name and she was all for it, and very excited when our DD was born 😊

I wouldn't. My friend did it to me. Although she went about it very strangely so Maybe it bothered me more because of that! I had loved my little boys name since I was young, all my friends including her knew this and it was no shock I called him this name when he was born. The following year she had a little boy and called him the same name, she kept lying to me saying that baby didn't have a name yet then I found out from a mutual friend she had used the same name and it was all over Facebook (I don't have favebook). We all found it really awkward and odd but I think it was the lying that made it uncomfortable. I personally wouldn't use the same name as anyone I knew but I'm really funny about that stuff it's up to you if you feel comfortable to do so. Xxx