Namesake Nightmare

[jillianoconner]

Hello all,
My husband's Irish (born and raised in County Clare, but we now live in my home city of London), and his best mate as a secondary schooler back in the early 1990s was named Darren. He promised Darren he'd name our soon to be born son after him (I agreed because he let me name our daughter after my grandmother), and I'm at a loss. Darren really is the kindest man but I haven't heard that name except around my mum's friends who were all teens in the 1960s. Please HELP!
Do I go ahead with "Darren", or choose a more fitting, modern name? HELP PLEASE!!!!

Why on earth did he make a promise like that to his mate? His dying grandfather maybe, but a mate??

You need to be clear it is a joint decision and you hate the name Darren. Using as a middle name seems a decent compromise.

No! No no no.

Sorry Dazza, that ain't happening.

I predict that Darren will come back fairly soon because some of the 50-something Darrens are becoming grandads. I hated it when I was a kid, because the first one I ever knew was mean to me, but nowadays I can think of worse names. It seems fresher than Jayden or Tyler or any of that crop of names. Oddly enough I met a guy called Darren today who I would say was probably about 40 (I'd always associated it with slightly older people than that, my age, early 50s) and was very intelligent and interesting, a good advertisement for the name. Having said that, if you don't like it, you don't have to use it. I agree with SputnikBear - let his friend think it's all your fault, but don't feel railroaded into using any name you're not happy with (and obviously don't do the reverse to DH either).

It’s actually quite a nice name and if it hadn’t been so popular in the 80s it’d fit quite well alongside modern names. I don’t hate it and he’s certainly be the only one in his class!

Having said that, I’d go for middle name.

Why did he promise this? Did his friend save his life or do something out of the ordinary to warrant such an honour? Because I’ve got lots of good mates but I didn’t name my baby after any of them.

I wouldn’t saddle my PFB with Darren. It’s awful. Really dated. Just no. If you really feel you must honour this agreement Ohno’s suggestion above is a good one. Daniel Arrun is fine.

There were only 40 Darren's born in 2017 so pretty much no chance of there being another one in his class so there is an advantage.

How does big Darren feel about this? Does he still expect his mates baby to be named after him??!

Darragh? Not Darren though. It’s a bit like Wayne; you just can’t do it.

I think Darren is ok.
I remember when Archie , Alfie, Frederick and the like we're viewed as awful names. Thing a come round in cycles.
Fwiw this is why I would never agree to one parent choosing a name. Far better for both of you to choose a name you both like, than one you love but the other hates.

No your H doesn’t get to decide this. You both have to agree.

And surely you remember the time you promised your first best friend you would never call a child Darren, because of how awful that Darren she knew was?

It’s awful. Use it as a middle name rather than inflicting it as a first name.

Suggest Darragh?

I wouldn't even contemplate giving my child a name I didn't like- it should be a joint decision between both parents.