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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Anyone have experience of people disliking their baby names?

47 replies

amyem · 19/09/2018 14:41

Hi all,

I just wondered if any of you have had experience of other people not liking your baby names? My partner and I have chosen one for a boy and one for a girl (as we don't know what we're having) but whenever we've said it to anyone they either say they aren't keen or say "oh ok" or pull a bit of a face or something.

I know we shouldn't care what other people think as it's our baby, and people are bound to always have their own opinions and comments no matter what, but you still want people to like them don't you! It's a bit upsetting when we've put a lot of thought into things and people sort of put you down a little bit.

Have any of you had this before? If so what did you do about it? I appreciate a lot of people will say just don't tell anyone which is fair enough and definitely something we thought about, but we also thought that maybe it would be better to tell people so they have chance to "get used to it" before the baby comes along. I just feel like people are always a bit negative at what is supposed to be a really happy time!

Sorry for the rant, I suffer with anxiety and so people responding like that tends to set it off a bit and get me quite down about it as well. I know there's no pleasing everyone but you'd think people would at least pretend to like them out of courtesy! I'd never say I didn't like a name when someone had chosen it!

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Cosmoa · 19/09/2018 18:04

Nope, never! It's very rare but not super different and sounds similar to other popular names so it always goes down well. I think people find it refreshing.

letmepeeinpeace · 19/09/2018 18:10

Mumsnet hates my sons name!! 😂

LaBelleSausage · 19/09/2018 18:40

I’m shocked by the number of people who have been openly rude about my son’s name, and this is after he was born.

Comments have included:
“That sounds like more of dogs name, doesn’t it?”
“That’s what I’d call a wasp”
“Oh. What else was on your list?”

And most bizarrely

“Well that’s not the sort of name you can call out on the rugby pitch.”

SurfingOwl · 19/09/2018 18:44

We learnt not to tell anyone of our potential names after being pregnant with DD1.

DwayneDibbly · 19/09/2018 20:22

My DC child's name isn't particular out there but it is quite old fashioned (the shortened version is not), and there were a few raised eyebrows when we announced it, particularly as their middle name makes the job lot quite long. I doubt my DM would've been happy unless we'd named them something she'd endorsed (not happening!).

I was told by someone that when you love the child the name becomes synonymous with them & the love you feel for them, so in the end most people warm to your choice.

I can't imagine why anyone would be openly rude about a child's name (unless it was something like Adolf, or Boris!).

Enko · 19/09/2018 20:50

DS is called Conrad plenty of our friends and family were pretty shocked about it.

Its a real marmite name on MN many say its horrible but equally we get people saying they like it.

My mother said " thats HORRIBLE" when I told her his name.. I told her I didn't like what she had named her children so why did she think she would like what I named mine. (she wasn't keen on most of my childrens names originally) FFW 11 years and she told me" I always liked the name Conrad its such a good strong name".. in other words she got used to it.

On MN I am constantly told we should not have used a Irish name for DD3 as we are not Irish.. So what? We are european and the name is fantastic.

DD1 is called Phoebe it gets the thumbs up here on MN a lot as its a nice safe popular name. It bugs but dh and I how popular it has become she was born the year friends hit the screens in the UK and Phoebes exploded after. She is named after JD Salingers book " The Catcher in the Rye" DH had wanted that name for a girl since he was 14.. However she suits it and I do still love it as a name. It was never however my intention to have a top 100 (let alone to 25) name.. Nor dh's

Some people simply do not care for the names we care for.. I am not a fan of top 10 names yet many on MN love them.

I respond " oh lovely" when I am told what a child is named (if I don't like it i might get a bit more enthusiastic with a name I truly love) . resulted in one friend bursting into tears when I did, before telling me I was the first who had said a positive reaction to the name (Gertrude) Not my personal choice but it was what they liked.. Their child and not a made up name so why not?

IggyAce · 19/09/2018 21:03

My ds name got a few looks and mm thats unusual. It’s unusual for the uk, he was born before paw patrol but his name is the same as one of the pups.
The best comment that still makes me giggle was it sounds like an American porn stars name.

rackhampearl · 19/09/2018 21:24

Yes both mine and DH didn't like that we named DD2 Andie but now they love it, they couldn't imagine her with any other name. Just go with what you like.

ReginaPhalange89 · 19/09/2018 22:47

@enko how old is your Phoebe ? Asking because of the friends hitting the UK reference.... Friends has been around for like 20+ years?

I have a Phoebet too, I am a friend's fan but she wasn't name after that Phoebe. But i was asked a LOT if she was. It's always been my favourite girls name, I hadn't met another Phoebe when I had mine and since then I've heard of loads being born ! Still haven't actually met any though .

Enko · 19/09/2018 22:51

Regina she is in uni.. (and yes friends has been around 20 years) my youngest is 14.. I just adore names so often post and read here.

Dh and I were (and are) friends fans However because we named her Phoebe I could not have one of my favourite girls names for dd2 (Daphne) as we also adored Fraisier no one would have believed it was not from sitcoms we we had gone with Daphne and Phoebe.

ReginaPhalange89 · 19/09/2018 22:56

@enko ah I see ! It is such a great name , even if it is becoming popular. I dont think id have even changed my mind even if it had ended up the #1 name that year.

Ah that's a shame because Daphne and Phoebe actually sound lovely together!, I didn't watch Frasier so I wouldn't have made that connection

PinguDance · 19/09/2018 23:01

I don’t particularly like my actual name and a couple of my friends have names that I definitely wouldn’t choose - but you forget you don’t like the name once you know the person. Goes for babies too!
I guess everyone wants this magical name but at the end of the day it’s not that important. Even my own name - I don’t have to think about it much tbh as I have a nickname with friends and everyone at work pronounces it wrong anyway.

RaspberryBeret34 · 19/09/2018 23:06

I’m pretty sure some people didn’t like DS’ name but I didn’t tell anyone till after he was born so nobody said anything to my face! It does now really suit him so I do get people begrudgingly say it suits him (without actually coming out and saying that they don’t like it!). I don’t really care! And he is 6 and loves his name. I thought I’d go for a fairly mainstream name but went with exH’s option (eager to go with any hint of enthusiasm from him) and the name did have a link for me in a strange way so felt right! I’m really glad now I did go with it.

butlerswharf · 19/09/2018 23:16

We told no one our chosen name until it was decided and asked no one for their opinions!

BakerBear · 19/09/2018 23:21

I ve had this and no it doesn’t change when baby is born.

Family were still going on about dds name when she was 5 years old!!!!

I had a thread on here about it.

I got quite nasty with a family member about it last year and it stopped the hatred of dd name completely

Picknickers · 19/09/2018 23:25

My dh stupidly told his family the naqqme we had chosen at a bbq. They made such a fuss. Mil cried! Put dh off my favourite name. Still feel a bit wistful but the name we went with is lovely and suits her.

Pepper123123 · 19/09/2018 23:28

Yes!
I've loved the name Orla since before I got pregnant.
Everyone I've mentioned it to pull a face or tell me it sounds too harsh.

I've been put off the name now, sadly.

I'm not telling anyone the rest of the names I like...except my DP of course.

AlliKaneErikson · 20/09/2018 15:10

Not in real life but it appears that many Mumsnetters are not fans of DS name.

Nellyelora · 20/09/2018 17:01

Most people in real life aren't going to be rude about a babies name. If someone introduces baby Tutankhamen a normal nice person will say 'oh that's nice/oh that's unusual' not 'wtf?!' it seems to be grandparents/siblings that criticise names rather than friends/strangers and probably because it's their family so they feel some kind of ownership/responsibility over the child.

It always makes me smile somewhat when someone posts along the lines of 'help me decide between Hilda or Norma', there will be 20 people saying they don't like either name or like one but not the other and then someone comes on and says 'I have a baby Norma, we only ever get complimented on it' they therefore assume it's because people like it whereas in reality it's because most people aren't rude so say how lovely/unusual it is even if they detested it.

villainousbroodmare · 21/09/2018 03:32

Pepper123123 Orla is gorgeous! It is the very opposite of harsh with its soft roll. It's elegant and beautiful. No pronunciation or spelling issues either. Use it.

lrwe · 21/09/2018 04:29

@twiglet isn't Billy (aka William) Connolly Scottish?? Not that you should name your child William because your mum says obvs - but he's def a Scot!

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 21/09/2018 04:38

We never told anyone our DDs name. She had her name from the moment we knew she was a girl.

We're doing the same this time.

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