Why do people dislike hyphenated names?

[PoppyOnTheRun]

I’ve noticed a lot of dislike for hyphenated names and wondered what the issue with them is? Is it because it can sound cutsie?

My DC have very short one syllable names (we have a long although not hyphenated surname) but a friend has just called her DS a name very similar to Harry-Josh and is upset as people keep calling him just Harry and she is forever correcting people? Is this a common issue with hyphenated names or more because she has chosen two names that you don’t very often see hyphenated like that.

The main reason for asking is a pregnant friend just send me her shortlist of names and asked for my thoughts and one is hyphenated and another the initials spell out a word so my instinct was to veer away from both of those but I can’t really give a good reason for the hyphenated one.

In France it is totally normal

Is it though? I don't think so , not in the way we mean here. It is normal to have hyphenated names of a particular type, that is classical French names that have always been hyphenated. Marie-Therese, Jean-Phillipe, Marie-Claire, Jean-Claude etc. There are similar in English (often the same in fact) and they aren't seen as a negative here.

Do the French though normally stick together two random modern names, often nicknames or diminutives and use those as names? I don't think they really do use the equivelent of Lexi-Mae and Alfie-Jake etc, so no, I don't think that the argument holds water. Especialy when you factor in that the hyphenated names in France are seen as quite old fashioned and not as popular.

My parents gave me a hyphenated name - I hated it so much. EVERY time you say your name, you have to explain. Then some people just callled me by the first part of it, which my parents used to make a huge fuss about. It was shit. When I was sixteen I changed it to something entirely different, such a relief. Hyphenated names are wrong in every possible way.

They’re just a bit...unnecessary. Nobody ever uses the second part of the name. Sarah-Louise becomes Sarah, Laura-Jane becomes Laura, Lily-May becomes lily etc

Lots of hyphenated names are perfectly lovely just a bit of a mouthful. I'm not sure if I'd like one myself as I like having a short 2 syllable name which can't really be shortened. I suppose one of the dangers with hyphenated names is that they will be shortened to just the first name or the initials and this may not be what the parents initially intended. Equally I went to school with a girl who hated having a hyphenated name and only wanted to be known by the first of the hyphenated names.

They are annoying for the person with the hyphenated name having to constantly explain that, and sometimes difficult for official form-filling. Plus they just seem unnecessary. Pick two names and make one the first name and the other a middle name. As a parent, you can always call your child 'First name Middle name' sometimes, if you want.

“My Gran used to have a friend called Elsie-May (born around 1916) and another called Mary-Ann.”

I don’t think “could she be taken seriously as a CEO or consult a doctor or high court judge with a name like Elsie-May?” was a question many parents were asking themselves in 1919.

Because although people like to claim to be nice and enlightened and socially aware... there's a streak of snobbery about the width of the M25 that runs through MN sometimes.

I'm from the 80s when every other girl was Ann(e)-Marie or Sarah-Jane.

It's not snobbery, it's that I hate having a stupidly spelt name and I would also hate to have a hyphenated name because it's a pain in the arse in daily life. Even my work email address which has my name spelt in it has people replying with it spelt wrong! E.g. I get emails saying "Hi Sally" when it's actually 'Salli' (not my name).

The main reason IME is because it represents a demographic which many people don’t aspire to be

Can't put it any better than that.

Some ‘grate’ on me, for some reason, but even back in the 1800s, my great, great grandmother was known as Harriet Ann, not just Harriet (with the nickname ‘Tan’). I’ve always thought that was quite cute. I often call my daughter by both her names (Lara Kate) but she doesn’t have a hyphen and everyone else just calls her Lara.

The main reasons I dislike hyphenated names are that either

1. They’re long and clunky. Something like Harry-Josh doesn’t flow, it’s jarring. No wonder people want to simplify it by just using Harry. It sounds indecisive too, like you couldn’t decide on a name so picked two.

Or

1. They sound nice but are massively overused. For example, Lily-May or Ellie-Rose are quite pretty, but almost every hyphened girls names is something-May/Mae/Mai or something-Rose. It’s repetitive and dull.

And when you throw in a unique spelling on top like Lyllii-Mae, it does seem, for want of a better word, ‘chavvy’

Traditional hyphenated names - Anne-Marie, Mary-Jane, Mary-Anne, Sally-Ann, Sarah-Jane, all fine. The more Yooneek ones, not so much. DD1 was at school with an Emily-Maeve, which doesn't trip off the tongue easily.

The thing is, discriminating against someone because of their name is obviously totally unacceptable, but having a preference for names that 'fit in' with your social circle, background etc and not being keen on names that don't is surely pretty natural. It's just as likely for one group of people to find the names Tarquin and Persephone unappealing because of their poshness (and say so loudly on MN) as it is for another group to dislike Jayden and Lily-Mae. People tend to get slated for the latter but not for the former.

i love em, but i know some people think 'lower class' but its arbitrary
lilly-mai is no different than anne-marie and is no harder to say than Francesca

I have a hyphenated name and I hate it. Computer firms hate it, I’ve had the piss taken out me a lot because of my name I sound like a Walton. No one spells or gets your name right.

It’s not big or clever just to stick two names together!!

In France it is totally normal, although you don’t see many babies with hyphenated names these days, come to think of it.

It’s common in France because until 1993 you could only give your child a name from the list of official prénoms. Because this was a relatively small list you ended up with a lot of children with the same name, so you would hyphenate two to make it slightly more distinctive.

Typically used by the lower classes.

I've known a number of French names like Anne-Sophie, Marie-Laure, Charles-Loius, and Anne-Dorothée so in my experience of that culture, it seems acceptable. Similarly Spanish or Portugese double first names, like Juan José or whatever, but these don't tend to be hyphenated.

Despite this, I think it's hard to find ones that work well in English as it's simply not as frequently used. So Harry-Josh or George-Peter or whatever sounds unusual to my ears. Still, if someone introduced themselves or their child as Margaret-Jane or Paul-Thomas I'd definitely respect their choice and call them the full thing.

It but doesn't really work here.
The hyphenated names often don't go together, and often sound like Dad wanted Jake and mum wanted Alfie, so they called the baby Jake-Alfie of Alfiejake.