How on earth do people pick baby names?!

[karategirl]

I'm finding it impossible to choose any baby names. My husband has suggested a few, which are perfectly nice, quite traditional names, and which I would be happy to go with, but they all feel quite 'safe'. I'm wondering if we should go for something a little more unusual!

I, on the other hand, can't come up with anything. I've been ready through the book and nothing at all is standing out that I really love. There's one name I've loved since I was a teenager, but it's my brother's girlfriend's name, so completely off limits!

Please tell me I'll eventually find a name I love. I'm at my wit's end. Luckily, only 19 weeks along, so still have time to find something.

We looked at family names on both sides, considered our heritage (international family) and did go with names that are traditional where I come from but aren't popular in England. The names then felt like they 'belonged' to us and the kids like the combination of being the only child in school with their name but then going to my home and meeting people that share their name.

Found our DSs name by looking at top 100 names in America for the previous year.

Yes I agree with that. Got the inspiration for both of my dc's names from tv. Then looked into meanings. I had criteria for mine too though and it helped ie not top 100, not too religious and needed to be a bit continental. And yes you will find something. Go through your dh's list one one of those websites and see what alternatives you get from those. You might find eventually something clicks and becomes non negotiable. That happened with both mine!

Think of books you love, films, some even think of places, roll models, inspirational people and people from your family history.

I wouldn't say that the brother's girlfriend's name is off limits, tbh. If you really love it, use it.

Pick a name that you both like. Look at how popular it was last year and 10, 20, 30, 40, ...80 years ago. If you don't mind your child being known as Firstname Lastname, popularity isn't a huge issue. If the name is currently hugely popular for the first time, it is probably going to date.
Consider what the name might get shortened or lengthened to and what it sounds like, does it go with your surname, is it easy to spell and pronounce.

There's nothing wrong with a "safe" name. I'd rather be called Sarah than Pixibella or Wolverine.

Most mums won’t agree but I let my husband pick the name. We had discussed loads we liked so I knew we were on the same wavelength and had a certain vibe mind... but then I said - you pick. He texted me her name the next day (beginning middle surname) and I replied’ ‘perfecr’. Obviously I would have had power of veto if it was bad! I felt so much of the pregnancy was focused on me that it was lovely for my husband to take the lead on that one. And when he knew it was ‘his job’ obviously he thought really hard about what would be perfect for us, and it’s a very meaningful and beautiful name xx

We tossed lots and lots of ideas back and forth and eventually one just felt right.

Accept that they need to have a name, so choose one that you can live with. The name will grow on you with time once its attached to your baby.

I find choosing a faultless classic name is the best if you want to avoid name regret.

Walk around a cemetery - lots of name ideas!

Thanks everyone for the feedback - really helpful.

As an aside, I downloaded the ONS name database for 1996 to 2016 and was fascinated to see just how unpopular my own and my husband's very normal names have become in recent years!

I've gone through the Irish name database for the last 5+ names as I know I'd like our baby to have an Irish name. We've shortlisted one name, which we had agreed around 9 months before even conceiving! If she doesn't look like an Aoife we're stumped!

I have names I love, but DH has vetoed. DH has only come up with silly suggestions. We don't love any boys names, but we've shortlisted two we like.

Baby name books in the library.
Asked around family and friends for ideas (our surname is one syllable, so two or more syllables were preferred)
Baby names websites.
In the end my mum came up with the name, I didn't like it, but I had a GA during CS and she was named by my DH whilst I was unconscious.

I had a few names "filed away" for years before I had DCs. Two of the names were Irish, so it was lucky I married an Irishman.

DS's name was that of an ex-colleague, as was DD2's. DD1's was a famous novelist.

One day OH said a name in bed and it stuck, called bump it for the next few months and now that's her name whatever it is make it easy to spell and pronounce, mine is always said wrong and it drives me nuts

@HolySchmoly and @Cointreauversial I love Irish names! But as we live in England, neither of us has any Irish heritage and Mr Karate is not exactly a champion speller, he's vetoed all the ones I like. Probably fair, I wouldn't want to condemn our child to a lifetime of explaining how their name is spelled and pronounced.