Due within a few weeks of both SILs....name etiquette?

[littlerobyn]

I'm the last one, so could be the last to give birth. We are all finding out the sex very soon so it might make all this easier then once we know. However with dc1, I really loved being set on a name before birth, we had a back up favourite for the opposite sex just in case the scans were wrong!
However I'm really worried that I'll be the last to give birth and one of them will choose the name I have picked. We haven't discussed names but I know from previous conversations years ago we may have similar tastes.

Would it be batshit in this instance to still use the name we'd picked?

I'm worried I'll loose the plot if I have to let go of the name hours before giving birth and pick another when it's taken us about 2 years to agree on a boy/girl name, so it's not like we have a few we like!!!
We all have different surnames if that makes a difference?

I would ask them if they have thought of a name. If you say "We're going to call him George/her Olivia" they will almost certainly use that name.
If they use the name and you use the name too, it will be you who look silly.
I had two relatives give the same fairly unusual name to their daughters within months of each other, and the girls ended up in the same year at the same school. They were the only ones with the name.

I wouldn't go with the name if they take it first, too confusing and there are hundreds of beautiful names.
I also wouldn't tell them what it is, they probably won't choose it anyway and what if it's one they hadn't thought of, you put it in their mind and they love it?
I'd work on finding an acceptable backup name.

I think you're overthinking. However, if the name you like is very popular, I would have a second favourite name. I wouldn't personally use the same name as one of your SiLs.

I'd say the opposite to some other posters really and definitely not being the subject up! If they pick the same name then, you will know it is by chance/coincidence. If you share your first choice and they are planning the same it can only cause awkwardness if they use it. You'd be forever wondering whether they had already liked it or had nicked the idea!

The scan/babygro idea is genius !!

When I was pregnant with my first child, I was discussing names with my family. My sister said one of the names I liked, she really liked and wanted it for when she had children (she was single at the time). I wasn't really wedded to the name and didn't use it.

My sister later got married and they decided not to have children. I then used the name for our next pet, see it came in handy in the end LOL.

I think if you're not even half way through the pregnancy you should let it lie. If you really are convinced on the name, just refer to the bump as that name. No need to make an announcement re. We will use your baby's name if it happens to be the same as our chosen one. Waaaay too dramatic and entitled.

If it plays on your mind so much I'd say talk and yes do have back up names just in case.

I had this situation with my sister but we didn't want to say the names before the babies were here in case relatives gave too many opinions! We told each other the first initial so we knew we had picked different names from each other.

I have the same name as my cousin. None of us are fussed about it.

I was in this situation with my SIL.

1. I refused point blank to discuss names with her. That way, if she did pick the name I wanted, it would be a horrible coincidence but I'd know it wasn't on purpose so I wouldn't harbour any resentment

1. I was due to give birth after. I decided that if she got in first and happened to pick the same name, so be it. She gives birth first. I'd just have to suck it up, as the babies were too closely related to use the same name.

Thankfully she picked a totally different name - which is good as I didn't have a back up!

In all honesty, you'd be very unlucky if she did pick the name you want.

One of my best friend and I were pregnant at the same time. We had 10days between us. While I found out I was having a boy she didn't find out. I had my heart set on Isaac and since finding out he was Isaac, he was no longer "baby" anyway my friend never said a word until her son arrived and he was unnamed for a week because she didn't want to "steal" my name. Told her it was silly. Isaac is a beautiful name and I had no issues he son being an Isaac. So yes it can happen but I wasn't offended by it. There's lots of kids these days with same name, DD is called Eden, she has 3 cousins and a step sister called Eden too.

I was due a week before DP's SIL. She found out she was having a girl, we kept it a surprise. We had a name we'd picked out for a girl years ago, and just dropped it into conversation, though that conversation revealed we had quite different name tastes anyway! She had her baby first (6 days between the two of them!) didn't use our name, and we didn't have a girl anyway. But we still have "our" name!

If it's that important to you, discuss it with them. Even if you just keep the names between the three of you and save the big reveal for everybody else.