Would you use the name anyway?

[mistermagpie]

So I'm 34 weeks pg and if it's a boy, we really only have one name picked. However a friend of mine is 35 weeks pg and last week told me that her boys name is the same as ours. She told me first and I just sort of said 'oh how funny, that's the name we have picked too!'. She didn't really respond.

Factors for consideration:
A) both or other of us might have a girl anyway
B) we are friends but not particularly close ones, don't see each other that often and mainly socialise within a group that contains people that both of us are better friends with than we are with each other (if that makes sense).
C) our children won't go to the same school (she will go with the catholic school, we won't).
D) we have very very similar surnames, we're in Scotland so think McDonald and McDougal
E) and because you can't have a baby name thread without saying the name - it's Hamish. So not super common but not a rarity around these parts either!

WWYD?

Great name, definitely use it. 😀

I would use it especially if you aren't that close.

I think it would be fine to use it. Surely you don't need to decide now though? Don't you get 6 weeks to register?

Thanks all. No I don't need to decide now obviously, but the fact is that it's the only name DH and I both like! So even if we spend the next 12 weeks thinking we are unlikely to come up with another (given that we haven't in the last 8 months!).

I agree that she was probably sounding me out, which is why I feel a bit awkward about it. She literally said nothing when I told her, but she did pull a face...

Seumas/Seamas aren't an option as we have a relative with a Shay and that is a bit too close for comfort. They are all derivatives of the same name though I know!

Bet we both have girls anyway!

Cross that bridge when you come to it. There is only a one in four chance you'll both have boys and either of you might decide the name no longer suits when you see your child. So realistically, probably only a 15-20% chance you both use it.

She doesn't sound close enough to you for it to really matter, and it is a popular name.

Do you think she told you precisely so you wouldn't use it? In that case, you might expect her to be a little huffy but she will get over it. You did the right thing to say right away that it was your choice also.

I'd use it anyway, Hamish is such a great name.

I don't think it matters at all if you both have boys and call them Hamish. You clearly both have impeccable taste.

I have a wee Hamish of my own :)

Still use it. We have Hamish on the final-short list for our next DC. I wouldn't give it up for anyone!

I honestly cannot understand why anyone would be bothered by this.

Names are not unique, unless you invent a name especially for your baby. And even then, there's still a chance they may run into another one at some point in their life.

I would unquestioningly still use it. If it's that big a deal for her, she's free to choose another name. The onus is not on you.

Bet we both have girls anyway!

And they both have the same name...oh the irony

Just use it, it's a lovely name.

Use your name. You reacted perfectly by telling her immediately, it would be more awkward if you hadn't and came back later to tell her as then it might have seemed like copying but this way it's clear you were genuine and surprised.

And you probably won't both have boys.

My BF told me one of their top girls names was my DDs name and I encouraged them to use it both times. They only have DSs.

Definitely use it! She knows now that if you have a boy you'll call him Hamish and so the decision is hers now as to whether she uses it too. She might decide to use a completely different name if she has a boy and then if you also have a boy but ALSO give him a different name she could still be put out!

It's a lovely name and you've been open and upfront and, like many people have said, no-one owns a name!

Go with the name!! It's lovely. I really don't think it matters. The children might not end up really knowing each other. My DC don't see lots of my friends DC regularly because we have different days off work etc.

One of my best friends recently had a baby and asked me how I would feel if she used the same name as DS2 has. It was sweet of her to ask but completely unnecessary, I don't own his name!