Is it really that big of a deal?

[Kelsey28]

Is it really that bigger deal if a child has the same name as other children in the class? I see so many people on here give that as a reason not to pick a name and just wondered what the general consensus is? My mum called me my name and very few people had heard of it in the early nineties yet when I started school there was another girl with the same name sat next to me. It never bothered me.

I'm sure, Margot. I agree there are waves of names (my contemporaries are all Richard or James) but a cluster of those still leaves fifteen out of the top twenty (say) which vary very little indeed.

Bear in mind also that a couple of hundred years ago far fewer names were in regular use - 10-20% of boys would be given the top name. Nowadays the absolute top names are given to maybe 1% of children ... and that's why the chances that your Oliver is in a class with another Oliver are actually very similar to the chances for Ben or George twenty to thirty places lower in the charts.

Sorry to be pedantic but I don't think I'm seeing what you're seeing MrsHathaway . Looking at the popular names here: www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/livebirths/datasets/babynamesenglandandwalestop100babynameshistoricaldata

...the names such as the ones I mentioned fill the Top 20 in 1964 and 1974 (and so presumably the years in between) and are still heavily represented in 1984. They present as more than a cluster IMO. It seems to me that the two most consistently popular boy's names over the last 40 years have been James and Daniel, but other than that there is a great deal of difference between 1974 and now.

I've found it interesting to look at when you get into it.

This is a cool site for looking at historical popularity:

www.ons.gov.uk/visualisations/dvc363/babyindex.html

Jack and Harry both only entered the top 100 around 1990 and quickly rose in popularity thereafter.

The most long-term popular one I can find is Thomas, and even that suffered a dip in the mid 1900s (to the deep depths of around 50th place for a couple of decades!!). Michael was up there for many decades but has dropped off a bit in the last 20 years.

I apologise - I was sure there are some very popular names with very little movement. Maybe it's the top fifty; maybe it's actually more true of the US (I get a lot of name geek shares from US sites).

All I could find when Googling earlier was 1996 onwards which wasn't vastly illustrative. Half the links got trapped by my router as "Sex Education" anyway

Still, the point stands that some names such as Thomas are far more stable from a popularity point of view than others.

From my personal experience I'd say there's far more ubiquity in middle names than first names - girls my age are very likely to be something Claire or Jane and baby girls for ages have been something Grace, May or Rose.

And I'd agree that there's something a little unimaginative about using a very popular first name with the middle name du jour eg Lily Rose in the last decade or Sarah Jane in the early 1980s.

I'm really not a fan of popular names. Not so much because there'd likely be another child in the class with that name. It's more that popular names often become dated, they go in and out of fashion fast and that's what puts me off. For example so many children in the 80's were called Rachel, Rebecca, Jessica, Jennifer, Joanne etc, and now though those names are nice, I couldn't imagine them on a baby, only on 30 year old women!

I'm a Jennifer from the late 70's only came across one other in high school & my 18yo niece.

I've never considered my name to be popular... my school was full of Claire's, Nicola's & Louises.

Joey maybe that depends on area? I teach a Rebecca, a Jessica and a Rachel and there are two Joannes (one may be a Joanna now I think about it) elsewhere in the school...odd how geography alters these things

I think you should be able to name your child whatever you like, as long as the name isnt so out there that they will be picked on! So if you want to call your child Finley that's fine, if you want to go more out there and go with Flynn then great! Its your choice! You know your baby before he or she I born and you know that babies name when they come whatever it is, its not really anyone's business! I have an Emily which is very common but the right name for her and I love it so I don't care that its common! I'm due a little boy this week and he will be Albert (Albie as a nn) and I love it, it's perfect for him! I don't care about other peoples opinions xxx

I am of the opposing pov to most. I had a relatively uncommon, although not completely unusual name. I was the only one in the whole of my primary and secondary schools. I was very shy and absolutely hated it. I didn't want to be singled out and felt sure everyone thought my name was stupid. I deliberately avoided unusual names for my children. They are both shy too and like it when they meet others with their name.

EastCoast I love Albie

Albie is so cute!

Does an adult man necessarily want a "cute" name?

Bert he'll be Albert with Albie as a nn. So as an adult he'll likely use Albert for professional use with those close to him still using the nn but Albie is also fine for an old man IMO

Thankyou! I love Albie so much, but we decided to give him Albert so he could have more of a choice when he's older! I am known by my nickname, very few people know me by my full name- I only use it for professional and official stuff xx

I had a very 80s name that wasn't one of the most popular (ie Emma, Claire, Rachel, Laura), but popular enough that there were always a couple of us in my year at school. Combined with my surname it was dull dull dull (and in sixth form, there were two of us with the same first name+midde initial+surname). It was also the name of a famous tv character so always had the 'oh like X', until I thankfully and gleefully got to change my surname when I got married. HATED having a name in common with other people and feeling like I was somehow linked to them or we had something in common and people would associate us together, even if I couldn't stand them.

I don't much care what others name their kids, but to me it does feel a bit of a waste when they use very dull, ubiquitous names. Especially when there's been a big build up. A friend spent the full 6 weeks after birth deciding her babies' names, it was a real build up to the big reveal, and when she announced them as eg Amelia and George (not their real names, but similar in terms of popularity) it was a bit of an anti climax. 6 weeks? To come up with George?

Anyway, I wanted my kids to have interesting but not crazy outlandish names. Their names are both top 500 but in the 200-500 region. Both recognisable, pronounceable and spellable (unless you're a total idiot, which works well as an instant way of identifying those people). DD1 has only met one other girl with her name and was very bemused by it, she thought it was exciting to see another one but a little thrown by it. She says she prefers having a name that is just hers, but she is only 3 so who knows how she'll feel when she's at school and would rather be one of 20 Isabelles or Matildas!

I think we sometimes forget the main reason why people have names - to identify them .

Referring to Steve, Harry or Ellie often enough because we know so many of them....

There are SO many love names to choose from. I also feel that names that become overused lose a little of their beauty simply because of overuse. Like fashion they start to feel dated when people tire of them.

There's also a difference in naming you child the top 10 names when they are born than of you use a nice name that's known but less likely in there class or amoungst friends

Ie Charlie, Harry, Theo were all super popular 5 years ago. So the chances of 5/6 year olds called that is high, an scan be annoying being Charlie B, Charlie H etc.
If you happened to name your child Stanley or Ben, they are well known but not as top 10

My mums a primary teacher so she's heard some crazy names in her time. I think that's what made me steer more towards traditional/popular names with my two boys. Last year she had 3 Jaydens (all spelt differently) and a few years ago she had a Merlin(?!).

I'm a teacher and really struggled with this when naming dd1 3 years ago. Her name is in the top ten, but I've loved it for years and always imagined giving this particular name to my little girl.
Having taught for nearly ten years and therefore come across some extremely unusual names (Boo, L'Oréal and Anna-Stazia anyone?!) I came to the conclusion that, if it were me, I'd rather be Olivia A or Emily T than Araminta or Sheherezade...

When I named my son I had no idea what his future class mates would be called! I didn't even think to wonder about that.

I think its quite insulting to say that no thought has been put into a name if its a common name.

My DS has a name which has been mentioned on here as common - it was my Grandad's name and my H's granddads name (actually a tradition in H's family) so it was always going to be DS' name.

DD - actually first child - is a common name, but given that we didn't really have any friends with children and I never thought to look up popular names before she was born, had no idea it would be so popular. She's an Isobel. But when she started reception, she was 1 of 5 girls in her class all called Isobel or variations of that. They became known as "Isobel with an "o", Isabel with an "a", Double L Isabelle, Izzy and Bella".

I love her name, but its been annoying having to say Is-O-bel when speaking to anyone (parents / teachers etc) trying to differentiate which Isobel was my daughter, and she definitely got fed up with it.

Some people also look at the meanings of the name they are considering. Although it always helps if you know the correct meaning... I know of someone who called their daughter Arcadia thinking it meant beautiful in Spanish

My son is Harry and we were dubious about choosing such a popular name, but we're in Scotland where I think it's a lot less common. My Harry is the only in his school, and the only child Harry we've ever met. I wanted Harry for my first born, boy or girl. I do think a little girl called Harry would have been lovely, and when I look at my daughters I still think they would both have suited being called Harry.

I get excited now, when I see someone with the same spelling of my name. My sister has a very unusual name, that I don't think I have ever seen anyone else called.

DS also has a very unusual name, but its a name I have always loved with the added benefit that it can be shortened to a more "normal" sounding name, if he wants to do that in the future.

My dd has the same (not too common) name as another girl in her reception class. I was a bit gutted when I found out because the same happened with my older ds and it did cause problems with teachers getting them mixed up. Years back the other lad with the same name got in big trouble for something and my ds had plenty of kids assuming it was him and him having to explain that it was the other boy.
My daughter also doesn't like the fact that the other girl gets called by her full name while she seems to have had hers shortened (it's a name that can have several alternatives) - I had to have a word with the teacher about that.
Whilst I do understand it's to distinguish between the two, I don't want my dd feeling she is inferior somehow to the other girl!! I do sometimes wish I'd called her something very unusual.