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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Maybe a controversial question!

42 replies

BroadcastHouse · 28/01/2016 03:33

Interested to know your thoughts. Wondering if the mumsnet Baby Name forum users are not all parents-to-be in their 20s/30s as I would haven initially assumed? I've been really surprised by the large number of posters who seem to be very pro standard names such as Michael, James, William, Andrew - and have very strong opinions against mildly alternative names (I've recently seen extreme responses to Lawrence, Silas, Archer, Xavier) - opinions that seem similar to those of my parents in law. (Whose kids are Mike James and Chris).
Anyone who has those names lined up for their baby, please don't get me wrong, I like them very much. It just strikes me that, for those of us having our families now, these are often the names of our husbands, not our kids. So I'm wondering if this forum has a wider demographic than just my peers - and these reactions are a generational thing? Or if there really is a general swing back to names of this era? Any thoughts?

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Bambambini · 28/01/2016 04:09

Depends on what you think your peers are. I think many different ages and backgrounds comment on names. It's not only 20/30 yr old mums to be. And even they will have very different opinions on names.

Sophronia · 28/01/2016 09:42

I think people on this forum are generally very pro classic names which have been around for generations and stand the test of time, as opposed to trendy names which will date to a particular era.

cheekstime · 28/01/2016 10:18

I think its very hard to find 'different' boys names most of the more convincing ones happen to be more classical. Got to say I'm not a fan of them. Like to add, some of my family have picked them out of the bible... (they are not christian) I mean we have moved one from that type of thing surely?

I think my answer maybe more controversial than the question.

Goodluck :) I'm struggling with names big time

FuckedUpFanjo · 28/01/2016 10:26

But not everyone in their 20s/30s would pick a non-husbandy name. They wouldn't all have the same taste. At baby group there are mums in that age range with a Desmond, Michael, Steven. Maybe I've misunderstood your point?

CwtchMeQuick · 28/01/2016 10:30

I had my son when I was 18, I named him James. He's now 3.5, I am 22 and still like traditional names.
It's not generational, it's just personal preference. I like quite classic names. Nothing to do with how old I am

diploddycus · 28/01/2016 10:31

Of course people who frequent the baby names topic are not all going to be in their 20s or 30s. Names that you think are unusual, old fashioned or just not to your taste all depends on many factors including where you live as well as what age you are.

PotOfYoghurt · 28/01/2016 10:33

You're wondering if Mumsnet has posters who aren't 20/30? Really?

Have you been here long?

diploddycus · 28/01/2016 10:34

I don't think I explained that very well, I suppose it's not much to do with age. I don't think Christopher/Chris is a husband name, it's a perfectly good name for a baby born in this generation too. Derek is a husband name

honeysucklejasmine · 28/01/2016 10:37

Are you suggesting that the age of the parent determines the type of name someone chooses? I really don't think it does... Maybe the culture within which you live, and the peers you have, would have an impact, but not just your age.

Dsis is a decade younger than me and lives in a rather rough urban area, and yet the name she chose for her DD was exactly, exactly, what I had decided on.

Tartyflette · 28/01/2016 10:38

Derek is a FIL/Grandfather name, rather than a DH name these days, IMO. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Christopher is a classic.

PurpleDaisies · 28/01/2016 10:39

I've been really surprised by the large number of posters who seem to be very pro standard names such as Michael, James, William, Andrew - and have very strong opinions against mildly alternative names

I'm not sure that's really true. There are lots of names on here that definitely fall into the mildly alternative category that attract a lot of love from posters (Romilly and Rowan are two that spring to mind). It depends which threads you read.

Made up names and unique spellings are usually met with dislike though.

Pootles2010 · 28/01/2016 10:39

Its not an age thing, its a class/peer/education thing.

StitchesInTime · 28/01/2016 10:39

William and James are both currently top 10 baby names in England and Wales. Michael is in the top 100. Andrew is outside of the top 100 so less popular for babies right now.

There are thousands of people who have recently become parents who like these names enough to have given them to their sons. Presumably plenty of these people will be in their 20s or 30s. Not all parents are put off by the prospect of their new born baby having a name that is "standard" or that may also be relatively common among adults.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 28/01/2016 10:41

A) many women in their 40's have babies. It's not just for women in their 20s and 30s

B) Both James and William at in the top ten baby names. You may be married to one; your daughter may well get married to one too.

HolditFinger · 28/01/2016 10:43

I'm 40 and chose a very unusual flower name for DD. Lots of my younger 20's-30's friends chose traditional safe names for theirs. I don't think it's age related as much as mindset or personality.

BathshebaDarkstone · 28/01/2016 10:43

I'm 48 and have had all my DC, none of whom have conventional names. HTH.

SweetSuz · 28/01/2016 10:56

Like OP I'm also surprised and disappointed at how many people on here love the "classics" (which to me translate as plain dull) names and are so quick to criticise anything not falling within the William/Thomas name remit.
However I think slightly older mums are more likely to consider less play it safe, middle of the road names, their extra life experience may well have shown them how these names might not stand out/are 100s of others called the same and additional age = confidence to not just follow the crowd but dare to be a little different maybe??

I'm 32 for what its worth but constantly surprised by how many of my friends (who I thought were quirky/individual) end up choosing very boring, middle of the road names for their DCs.

LaurieLemons · 28/01/2016 11:15

I don't think it's anything to do with age, just personality/preference. My mum gave us all very odd names and she had us quite old. I'm in my twenties and chose a 'boring' name. Sorry to disappoint .

mrsnec · 28/01/2016 11:24

I'm 38. I have a 15 month old dd who has a very retro first name which I absolutely love but I've never met one her age and it was more popular in the 70's. I just love the meaning of dds name which is why I used it. The meaning of a name is the most important thing for me.

Her middle name is also classic but in the current top 10.

Ds is due in a few weeks and my top two names on the shortlist are husband names but one of them is still top ten. Whilst I don't like things that are too popular I believe that some classic names are classic for a reason and others deserve a revival like dds does.

In my shortlist I do have some slightly more daring choices but they'll probably end up as a middle name.

Elledouble · 28/01/2016 11:29

I'm 30, my son has a biblical but unusual name. We were going for 'uncommon but not weird' and I think we hit it pretty well! I've had lots of compliments for it, although people do sometimes mispronounce or misspell it. It's the risk you run I guess.

steppemum · 28/01/2016 11:42

well, I am 48, so no, not in your peer group.

But I had my kids when I was 35, 37 and 40, so wouldn't have been in you peer group then either.

For what its worth, I don't think age is the determining factor, I think where you live and class/social group is much more significant.

My eldest brother and I have pretty similar name tastes, classics, (not actually the ones you mention which are a bit boring to me) real names, but we tried to find less common ones. I love Silas for example.
But brother no.2 is a much less conventional person. His kids have non standard names, names which a generation ago were not names. I really dislike that naming style.

Also, from your examples Xavier is considered to be very posh, and cre8tive spellings are considered to be very chavvy by many.

BettyBi0 · 28/01/2016 11:55

I think people are generally more conservative with boys names which is really sad and boring. I've been so surprised by friends who I always saw as quite alternative/ open minded picking 'normal' boys names and encouraging their sons to be naice 'normal' boys.

I don't think it's an age thing

snowymountaintops · 28/01/2016 12:04

Derek is definitely your Dad's name !

I think it's much more to do with class than age tbh.

NerrSnerr · 28/01/2016 12:04

I just checked my daughter's name and it's not in the top 50 which surprised me because it's a sensible classic name. I'm in my 30s. I find the comments about being disappointed with friends for their name choices strange, it seems odd that you would think less of someone because of a baby name.

I do think some people try a bit too hard with names. If my child is going to be quirky or unique she will be whatever her name is. She can use whatever nickname she wants, but if she chooses to be quiet and not want to stand out her name allows for that too.

Cel982 · 28/01/2016 12:13

SweetSuz and Betty, why in the world would other people choosing traditional names make you sad?! It's a matter of taste, it doesn't determine the child's personality. I don't think of myself as particularly conformist, but the name I've earmarked for a future DS is definitely a traditional one. They're good names, that's why they become classics.

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