Can I still use this name?

[IslaMann]

Opinions please- DC2 due early next year. DH & I have very few names we can agree on, so happily a couple of weeks ago we agreed to call baby (if a boy) Henry. Two days after we managed to agree, DS who is 19 announced that his stepsister had just had a baby boy called Henry. While I've never met her, and aren't likely to, it's put a dampener on the name for me. Firstly it means my DS will have both a half-brother and a step-nephew with the same name, and secondly I can't bear the thought that XH and his wife may laugh about my baby not having an original name, if you see what I mean? So, would you change the choice, or would you stick with it? Thanks in advance.

Assuming your DS is likely to see his step-sister and her child more than once in a blue moon then I would choose a different name

I think Henry is a common enough name that nobody will even connect the two, especially as you've never met these people. I'd stick with it.

I'd change it. Although it's probably common enough that it wouldn't seem too weird to an outsider to have 2 Henrys in an extended family. I'd want the clarity and separation from ExH's family too

Harry?

I think I'd choose something else, tbh
It seems a shame now, but as soon as your little one is here, they 'become' their name, and - as it would appear from your op that your relationship with xh and his wife isn't that great, then it would just be easier all round to use a different name.

I would choose a different name.

Oh dear, isn't it annoying when something like that happens. If it were me I would probably choose a different name. If it's already kind of bothering you now that feeling probably won't go away after the baby is born :-( I'm sure you will think of something that's equally lovely as Henry and you will be happy with. Good luck.

Is your son close to step sister? He is the only connection so if he doesn't see her much, won't have much bond with the baby, then maybe it's ok. I think say to him and ask if he would find it silly. If not then stick with it. What a pain. When it's a great name to have chosen.

Personally I wouldn't.

I think it's fine to still use it. It's not an unusual name so you've clearly thought of it independently.

DS sees his stepsister maybe once a month at most. He sees no reason for us not to use it, nor does my DH. It's me that has the problem with it. It's taken the specialness away for me iyswim. I think we're going to have to reconsider. Thanks for all your input.

Do you have many mutual friends. Honestly. If it was a definite winner then I would try not to care what you're ex's family are called.

I'd change it. Henry is boring and too popular anyway, which is why you are having this problem.

Well I'm kinda in the same situation. My DH loves the name Abigail. If we have a girl, that's the only name that will do! Trouble is, my stepsisters have a half-sister (not mine) who is named Abigail. It's gonna be confusing cos DH is completely adamant and I can't say no because he's too cute about it. But it's not a big deal really. If you love the name, go for it. If you are put off, don't. Your DS is not gonna get confused really lol.

On a side notes would love love love to give Abigail (if we have a girl) the middle name of Bethany as it is the name of a dear friend who was a life saver to me in the past. But my step sisters have a second half sister called, you guessed it, Bethany! So I might be not going for that combination, just a step too far haha!