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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

I need an opinion on a name

63 replies

kalix · 02/06/2015 13:07

My wife and I are expecting our first child and we're having a boy. We both want to call him Jasper but my mother hates the name (to the point of being cruel) as does my wife's grandfather. We are sticking to our guns as we do not think it is their right to decide what our child is called and are sure that they'll get over themselves once the little one is born.
My reason for writing is that I just want some people who don't know us to voice their opinion on the name. We are now worried that we're so determined not to be bullied (seeing as we are grown adults) that we might be making a mistake.
Thanks

OP posts:

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Stinkersmum · 02/06/2015 13:41

DD, not dc! I should hope it's a dc!!

SylvaniansAtEase · 02/06/2015 13:45

'It's a great shame you don't like the name we have decided on. We were really hoping that Jasper would have a close relationship with all his grandparents and great-grandparents - I hope we don't have to end up shielding him from such rude comments within the family by keeping more of a distance...'

Stick to your guns, for three reasons:

It's a great name.
Even if you wanted to call him Bobby Doo Dah Doo, it's YOUR DECISION.
Use this situation to make it 100% clear to the senior members of the family that your child = YOUR DECISIONS. Back down on this, and the grandparents will take it as a green light to tell you what else you're doing wrong too... And that way lies a LOT of heartache. Do everyone a favour and put up those boundaries NOW.

marshmallowpies · 02/06/2015 13:46

I do think of it as a dogs name first (my much loved and missed great aunt had a dog called Jasper) but I would still consider it for a DS too. I would go for it!

midnightvelvet01 · 02/06/2015 13:47

I don't know one single Jasper in RL.

Infact I think I've only ever heard the name as one of the baddies from 101 Dalmations film. That's my sole knowledge of it.

You go with the names you like OP. My DS2 is called Max, my grandma was very sniffy & said that its a dog's name. I gave her my best silent stare. He's 5 now & he's totally a Max, he couldn't possibly be anything else & very occasionally we come across dogs called Max but it matters not the tiniest fuck. He is more entranced seeing his name on road signs, max speed etc :)

You go with Jasper. Or find a really dreadful name, tell then you're calling him Caspar or Frank or Alan or Brian or Franz, then once he's born & you announce him as little Jasper then they will be so relieved they won't say another word

sweetpeame · 02/06/2015 13:47

Personally I don't like it. Maybe because my cousin had a dog called Jasper when we were kids. But that's beside the point. If you and your partner like it, then use it. My husband and I haven't told anyone the potential names for DS due next week precisely because I don't want any family or friend opinions on them. Just don't mention the name again until he's born and introduce him as Jasper. It's unlikely that faced with a beautiful new baby, your families are going to be critical or disparaging about his name. And even if they are, it's too late to do anything.

midnightvelvet01 · 02/06/2015 13:47

Actually as soon as I'd posted I remembered that my dear old MIL used to call wasps 'jaspers', no idea why....

reuset · 02/06/2015 13:48

There's nothing wrong with the name Jasper.

It's not like you want to use something ridiculous or out there. Those sort of comments you can and should discount. They'll stop when you officially announce after the baby's born, or you'll have to have strong words with them/him

Tranquilitybaby · 02/06/2015 13:49

It's lovely and more importantly, it's what you want, so don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

You're grown adults and its your right as parents.

Moral of the story - don't discuss names with others!

NoArmaniNoPunani · 02/06/2015 13:50

My MIL ruined our top choice girl's name. I think it's best not to announce a name until the baby arrives so there's less chance of someone spoiling it.

BikeRunSki · 02/06/2015 13:53

Am I the only person who thinks its slang for wasp?

Stinkersmum · 02/06/2015 13:55

Lol Bike no, I know it's a nn for wasps. I just like the name anyway.

midnightvelvet01 · 02/06/2015 13:55

I mentioned it earlier Bike, I wonder where its derived from?

We generally call them 'wobblers' as in 'look out, there's a wobbler'. But MIL used to call them jaspers

badg3r · 02/06/2015 14:08

Jasper is nice, I prefer it to Geoffrey. Tell them you have gone back to the drawing board and you'll see what suits him best when he arrives to get them off your backs... then just call him Jasper.

MamaLazarou · 02/06/2015 14:18

Tell her not to be so rude. She will just have to get used to it.

Once it is the name of her new favourite person, it will grow on her.

My mum laughed incredulously when I told her my baby son's name. Fortunately, I am an adult and don't need her approval.

RiverTam · 02/06/2015 14:23

you have now learnt the hard way never ever to discuss names before you actually name your baby!

Ignore them. Jasper is a perfectly nice name.

purplemeggie · 02/06/2015 14:24

Firstly, I like it. I have a young relation called Jasper and a friend with a Jasper too - it's not completely "out there" - and I've never heard any negativity about it.

Secondly, my MIL was really rude about our choice of name for ds. Eventually, DH said "Stop going on about it Mum, we've registered his birth, it's too late now", which stopped her in her tracks. He's 7 now, and everyone's just accepted it.

TranmereRover · 02/06/2015 14:25

Jasper is a lovely name, they're rude, and Geoff(rey) is a hideous burden for a baby. Screw them

RattieofCatan · 02/06/2015 14:34

I love Jasper, it's on my list for when I eventually have children! Tell them to sod off.

Quasilulu · 03/06/2015 01:24

Jasper is a lovely name. My DM turned her nose up at our DD'S name even though it was a derivative of hers. No pleasing some people

nooka · 03/06/2015 05:26

I don't like Jasper very much but there's nothing particularly wrong with it, certainly not enough to 'hate' it.

I also totally agree that you should really avoid sharing names before the baby is born, too much possibility for upset.

sleepywombat · 03/06/2015 05:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeaAndALemonTart · 03/06/2015 05:34

I don't like it, it means wasp here. I don't think it sounds nice.

carbolicsoaprocked · 03/06/2015 05:40

Jasper is a lovely name, it's also got a cool factor. Some of the people we've told about our future DC's names (we told very few as didn't want anyone being nasty about our choices) didn't like them but we love them - not traditional names like Elizabeth or James but not unusual either. You'll never please everyone with your choices and this is your child, so please yourselves. Go for it!

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2015 08:29

Different generations naturally like different names. Trying to please everyone else is completely impossible for this reason. Someone will always be rude no matter what you call your child. It doesn't have any obviously bad associations. It sounds unfamiliar to your relatives at the moment; wait until he is born, everyone will get used to it very quickly.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 03/06/2015 08:43

Nothing wrong with Jasper. Your baby, your choice, and anyone telling you otherwise should butt out.

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