naming kids after grandparents?

[kiritekanawa]

Do people do it? If you name one kid after a grandparent, do all subsequent ones then have to politely follow on taking grandparental names?

For various reasons we would quite like to pass down the names of our fathers, in male or female forms: Michael(a), Charles/Caroline; John/Johanna/Jan/Jana/Ivan (though not Ivana).

DH would also probably be very happy to name a daughter after his Mum, (though her name is not one that can be lengthened or shortened or left the same, to be anything i actually like as a name. No offence to her, she's a bit self-centred and unempathetic, but generally fine and loves kids; she just has a crap name)

But if we did any of that, the shit would hit the fan and my bloody mother would be hurt for ever more and we and our child would never hear the last of how the poor child WASN"T named after my mother, and therefore has defective nasty parents. My mother is not someone I'd want to name a child after, and her name isn't one I'd want to use anyway.

Thus... any suggestions for names similar to the ones given above, or suggestions on how to brazen it out and go with the ones we like?

Personally, we didn't do this because all my parents/PILs have fuck-ugly names. Really. They are of the Janet/Norman type generation. Why would I foist that on my kids when there are so many lovely names around?

DH wanted to try for sticking his Dads name in the middle, but I hate his dad's name (Think Timothy, if you hate the name Timothy). I can see so many other ways to honour your parents.

I wouldn't expect my grandchild to have to bear my rather 70s naff name - so why would I do that to my DC? And as you say, if you leave someone out - eek. Personally, unless you adore the name of one of the GPs I'd leave well enough alone. Go with names you really like.

yeah.

Pity as we have so many lovely Johns and Michaels in our lives! Our kid could have about 6 godparents all with (variations of) the same name if we went with either of the grandfathers' names.

Suggestions for things similar to those above?

My dd is named after two of her four great-grandmothers. My mother wasn't very happy when we told her because she didn't get on very well with her mother, and apparently her mother didn't much like her name. She suggested that we use my other grandmother's name. I said that I didn't like the other grandmother or her name, and dd's name was registered anyway so it was too late. She's never said anything since.

ds has no family names. I don't really see that as an issue.

Personally I don't think I'd give a child a first name of someone who was still alive, because I think individuality is important. Middle names no problem. OP couldn't you give your child two middle names and have one from each side?

Oh and I think if you choose one of the less well known variations of the names people might well not make the connection (ie John/Ivan or Charles/Caroline)

Nooka has the right idea - keep the name a bit subliminal, so that it doesn't immediately relate.
Love Ivan, and love Caroline. (Could go for Charlotte though although that probably has already rocketed in popularity!)

Just from googling John you already find - Evan (love),Eoin, Jack, Sean (not so keen, but still).

I have a friend who gave her daughter her late mothers initials which I thought was quite a nice touch whilst still giving the child their 'own' name.

So,instead of Joan Elsie Smith the child was named Jasmine Elise Smith (not their real names!)

Hmm. I'd quite like to go with something highly uncontroversial and traditional (in an English sense) as a first name, and something in M?ori that's locally evocative (we're in the south of NZ) as a second name.

Any suggestions along the following lines...?

Traditional names:

Caroline, Johanna, Margaret, Elizabeth, Anne, Grace
Thomas, Peter, Matthew, Edward, Edmund, William, Henry, Richard, George

M?ori names:

Moana (=ocean)
Toroa (=albatross)
T?i (=T?i, local bird like a nice magpie)
Korimako (=bellbird)
Karearea (=falcon)
Toutouwai (=black robin)

also Marama (=moonlight), Ngaire (=silver fern), Hahana (radiant light - the light here is amazing).

am less keen on names specifically from mythology...

My oh and I gave our ds his first and middle names after one of each of our grandads, but only because we liked the names anyway. Or so I thought.

We are now expecting our second child and my oh is obsessed with only using family names as "that's what we do"... I don't like any other family names.... Chaos to ensue.

Loving the Maori names by the way. And in summary, I think you have to like the names you choose, not just pick them for family members!

Yes we did something similar. I wanted to name dd after my dgm. Dh hates that name but said if I want to use it we have to include his dgm's name too which is awful. The alternative and the compromise was a first name that was similar to my dgm's nickname or using a middle name on its own that is just one syllable of my dgm's name but a name in itself. We have both agreed we wouldn't use any family names if we were to ever have a son.they are the same on both sides and truly hideous. No idea what we'd do if we had another dd.I think we settled easily because we're not sure we'll have any more.

Dd1 is named after her Grandmother but she died a few years before dd was born. It is a variant not her actual name, and a more contemporary twist on the family name. We also both really liked the name.

I would say that unless they are both dead, people might get upset if you use their husband (or worse exh) name but not theirs and there would be comments when second child is born. The other issue that we have is that dd2 is a little jealous (particularly when dd1 rubs it in) that she doesn't have a family name. I really don't think though that she would like having any of the other family names - none of them have come back in yet! In fact next time it is raised I might point out her options and ask her which one she would have preferred to be called!

Really love the Maori names (I'm from the south of NZ too! live in London now tho), Moana is absolutely gorgeous and I just adore the meaning.

The thoughts did cross our mind when naming DS about naming him after my Granddad which was also the name of my step Granddad but it was a not a very nice name for this generation (Gordon!) plus we wanted to name DS the middle name of DH late brother. Is middle names of Grandparents an idea?

Also if you only have two children, you miss out two other grandparents which could be regarded as unfair or favouritism. Tbh I think a child should have their 'own' name too.

My DD is named after my late Great Aunt who was like a granny to me.

My DS is named after my late granda.

We love the names even without them being family names. And DP's is NC with his family so he wasn't worried about offending them.

We had completely different non-family names picked out but when the DC were born I felt an overwhelming urge to give them 'meaningful' names.

thanks all

have been enjoying the t?i zooming round the garden today, and the gales blowing up from the southern ocean, with the thought in the back of my mind that (if we have a girl) there could be a small T?i or Moana or (if we have a boy) Marama or Toroa, in 7.5 months.

But for ease of life outside NZ I think something easier to pronounce, and not directly referencing grandparents, is probably sensible.

DD has versions of both grandma's names as her two middle names. I didn't like the actual names so we changed them a little bit.

I thought we were being very clever with this but we're then stuck for any future DC - no more girls names for a DD, and the grandad's names and middle names are all awful!

Meh. If you really like any of the names, go ahead. Just choose the names that you like and don't get bogged down.

As a general observation - not everybody likes their own name, and not everybody is fussed about having someone named after them. I certainly wouldn't want it.

interesting one. ds has my Mum's maiden name as a middle name - thought dm would be delighted. Turns out that her poor relationship with her father tainted the name for her so she wasn't bothered!

There is a (god awful) family name in DH family. He was lumbered with it, it's his fathers, great grandfathers, great great grandfathers etc. DH and I both hate it so we named our DS a name we both liked and were the first of several generations to leave out this name completely.
Nothing was ever said, and even if it was it wouldn't have changed a thing.

Our 1 month old DS has Michael John as his middle names after his grandfathers. His first name is one we liked and not a family name. Our DD has one middle name which combines elements of both her grandmothers' names. I'm hoping we haven't lumbered DS with out of date middle names as they are not popular modern or popular old man names. I like the fact that both children have been given family connections.

In my culture we only do it after dead ones so they ones who don't get that honour have no idea whether they did or didn't.

My cousins were named after grandparents only in as much as they were given names beginning with the same initial.

thanks everyone.

good idea wildpoppy

If our impending dc is a boy, he will have DHs maternal grandpa's name as a middle name (both grandpa's are no longer with us but amazingly both grandma's are). DH did have a bit of a wobble about his paternal grandma being upset that we didn't include her DHs name, but dc will have his family name. She's also not that precious. I'm glad about that as I don't like his name.

We gave the DCs middle names relating to grandparents.

I really like Tui. I know a Tiiu; I don't know the origins of that name but it isn't a problem at all. She tells people once how to pronounce it (tee-oo) and that's it.