OH wants to pay tribute in middle name - I don't like it!

[bethellex]

Hi all, I'm having my first baby in November - a little girl and OH wants the middle name to be Pauleen, after his Gran. As much as I like his Nan and think this is a nice thought, I really don't like the name! Also my mum's new partner is called paul and it just reminds me of him!

The two first names we've managed to both agree we like are:
Lilia (preferred)
Alba

Do Lilia Pauleen or Alba Pauleen sound that bad?
Am I being selfish and disrespectful?

Our last name starts with R and is two syllables.

I like the name Lilia Belle.

I was thinking about the idea of two middle names so for example: Lilia (name) Pauleen (lastname)

What are everyone's thoughts on all of the names!? And any suggestions!?

[NoSquirrels]

My DC love to know why we picked their names. They are fascinated by having middle names that belonged to other people my DH and I considered special.

I think middle names are for honouring/tradition, and first names for picking something you like as a "new" name to be passed on - perhaps in the future to new generations.

Don't change the spelling, though.

[Lagoonablue]

I too was going to suggest Paulette. It's nice. I don't actually mind. Pay keen though tbf.

[MultipleMama]

My brother and I have both have my father's name, and he has his father's. However, that's our culture and I do love the family and honor aspect about it.

However, I also believe in children being their own indivuals and that's what first names (or mn depending in whoever) are for though I'm slightly hypocritical. Not all my children are named after someone because we have 3 cultures and wanted to express that.

I see nothing wrong with it, however I do believe both parents have to compromise or come to an understanding. If you're not keen can you ask DH why he specifically wants your child to have Grandmother's name?

[wafflyversatile]

I'm not keen either but she will hardly be alone in having a middle name that she hates because it's unfashionable and grannyish.

Or maybe she will be. It does seem that people don't choose family names so much now.

Now I don't know what my opinion is.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

Well, I think your Grandmas had far nicer names for starters.

I don't think it's quite right to only honour one Grandma, so for that reason alone, I'd veto Pauline (plus it's not that nice).

What was your second favourite girls name? Could use that as a middle?

[Anjou]

Does your DH actually like the name Pauline, OP? Or is it just the fact he wants to honour his gran? If it's the latter, maybe find another connection: her middle name, her surname, maybe ask her to choose the middle name?

[vvviola]

We used my/my DM's/my DGM's middle name for DD1. Sort of a family tradition which I put my foot down on. But it meant acknowledging DH's side for DD2. I really didn't like the first names of anyone in his family. But thankfully we discovered his DGM has a lovely classic middle name that fits really nicely with our choice of first name.

It has the added complication of making us look like we have a thing about British royalty when you look at both DC names, which is entertaining :)

But would that be an option, would her middle name work better than Pauline for you? (Although I do like Pauline)

[MsCoconut]

I'm going out on a limb here are saying I quite like Lilia Diane.

How do you feel about:
Lilia Paulina Diane
Lilia Frances Pauleen
Lilia Genevieve Pauleen
Lilia Eva Pauleen
Lilia Francesca Pauleen
Lilia Pauleen Frances?

[ACM88]

What's your middle name?

I'm planning on using my middle name/or hubby's as opposed to grandparents, mostly to avoid arguments, but also because I want them to have my name, no one else's. My middle name is Marie, so it goes quite nicely with a lot of names.

It's a nice sentiment to use middle names as a tribute to someone, but only if you like the name, other wise it's a bit of a pointless gesture. (Just my opinion) it's the same reason why I decided against using my late fathers name as a first name, I love my dad, don't love his name. You don't need a name to convey how special someone is to you anyway!!