If you decided on a name before dc were born when did you start using it?

[mrsnec]

After a lot of hard work we found a name we both like. I feel set on it. Dh is still subject to change he thinks we might come up with something better and despite being very blunt and me having a meltdown we're still getting (un)helpful suggestions from his parents I'm worried they will influence him although he assures me they won't.

If I start referring to bump now as the chosen name will it help him get used to it?

Is it wrong for me to feel so strongly at this stage? (25 weeks)

I had a 4d scan at 22 weeks but I went with my mum. At the time dh said he was fine with it but now he wants another one at about 34 weeks and he says we'll decide once and for all then.

When did you decide and did you change your mind on something you thought you were set on and did scans have anything to do with it? He's so worried we're going to get it wrong.

Thank you mrsnec I think it sounds like you have a plan

It is hard when people fire random names at you and look disgusted at the ones you love. My Mum and Sister both said they hated DS3's name when I suggested it when pregnant. They have since told me it has grown on them and it suits him, I don't think they are lying
Funnily enough with my three boys I have ended up using the names I thought I liked least once they were born. DS2 had a different name for 20 mins then we changed it, it turned out there was 3 others on the ward with the first name we used so I was glad.

My SIL made a huge point of not telling the names she wouldn't discuss any names at all, I wanted to say you know no-one actually cares that much but am far too nice!

I do now but that's only because reading your responses has made me realise it's not a good idea to use the name to bump around Dh just yet.

Notso I'm glad your family were ok in the end! I said this on my other thread but my main issue is everything on my original shortlist took hours of research because the history and meaning of a name is important to me. They wouldn't have looked anything up they're firing stuff at me that sounds good to them or is easy to spell! And that includes dh too. They could at least Google it first!

It hadn't occurred to me about other names on the ward. I don't want anything too popular.

I think that's an interesting point about your sil. I don't think I've ever got into a discussion with anyone about it before for that very reason!

I have never found out the sex so never done yhe name pre birth. But for me babies do suit or not suit names. We tried out two top choices on our name list for an hour or two with DD1 and neither were right. We went with something totally different, and it turned out one of the names was just waiting for Dd2.
Also, I know someone who named their baby and then had been told the wrong sex. I think it made it extra hard to process that Daisy (not the actual name) didn't exist rather than 'baby is a boy and not a girl' IYSWIM.

Sorry for all those who have had losses.

parents already bought equipment despite me telling them not to but it is all unisex and I haven't deleted the boys shortlist so we are covered just in case! But that is another reason why we should wait definitely.

I often talk names with my Mum, but she knows she has no say in the name choice. Mostly it's jokey, outrageous suggestions. She also knows we have our favourites - but not what they are, and doesn't want to know.
We no longer discuss names with my in laws, after my MIL shared some rather strong opinions!
We don't know the gender - so baby is referred to as "bump" all the time.
I think it's nice to keep some mystery. When friends have had babies and shared gender and name ahead of time, the actual birth announcement seemed a bit of an anti-climax instead of the main event. That's just my opinion though!

We decided on names fairly early on (somewhere around the 20 week scan) but didn't tell the name, or refer to baby by the name until they were born. I like keeping the name between us to avoid unwanted opinions, I'd reather present it as a done deal, also like having something to announce, as we already knew the gender with all but one.

I did bond strongly with my children before birth but didn't really start to think of them by the name until after birth.

I think babies can suit/not suit names in a way. For instance I love the name Scarlett, but there was a strong chance my DC could have ginger hair as DH is ginger. I don't know if I would have called a red haired child Scarlett.
My friend had her son at 30 weeks and he was very, very poorly. They didn't use the name they had originally picked out for him, she felt that name was almost for the 'strong' baby she felt she should have had.
(He is a very healthy 6 year old now by the way)

Notso, my dm did the opposite of that! Changed my dbs name at birth because he was born with ginger hair. They'd decided on Matthew but changed it to a name that means 'little red one' although there are loads of celebs with the same name as db and none of them fit that description!

Glad your friend's son is ok.

raf I think I might try that with mil next time she suggests something ridiculous I will ask her if she's having a laugh!

Agree about the mystery and the anticlimax aspect. Db asked me. I told him we have a favourite because it has a very cute meaning but sounds very normal. Told him the meaning too and he says he's resisting the urge to Google it!

It doesn't refer to any kind of attributes it's a noun in greek.

Mil thinks she looks like a pixie or an elf from the scan pics. Surprised she didn't suggest that but all her family are huge so if she gets their genes it would be silly!

Op my dd looked like all pixie when she was born and i chose/a name that sounded like elf. That was the name I changed. She also went through a short phase of looking like a dolphin. I didn't change it to delphine though oh laughingly said we should.

We used it from 20 week scan onwards for both DCs.

Named at birth, I am too superstitious to start calling them by their name earlier. I feel the same about getting fear though, would rather not do it until around 37w! I don't know why, something about counting your chickens.

Didn't start calling my daughter by her name until she was born. I knew what I wanted to call her but DP kept me in suspense by not giving his official consent until after she was born (not that I need his consent - but we agreed to only call her something we both liked and he wanted to wait until the birth to eek it out and keep me in suspense)
Don't agree with naming baby before the birth anyway. There are plenty of foetus names - bumpy, lumpy, that kind of thing.

I did Google pixie names just in case but wasn't really inspired. Dh also reminded him about those family big genes again. He has a baby cousin who was born 7lb but was apparently nearly 3ft tall at 9 months. Her mother is the same height as me.5ft3 but my mum and mil have had an actual argument over who's genes are stronger which led to comparing photos of all sorts of people's babies!

Delphine has other meanings too you could have got away with it!

Elizabeth, I use that counting your chickens phrase about something every day!

Maggie, just use bump or her or she at the moment and it's just not very inspiring but I have a friend who did the same as you so if I'm patient I'll probably get what I want anyway.if I go by your experience.