AIBU to be influenced by my 3 yr old when it comes to naming new baby?

[PuffPants]

So I called baby X. Toddler informed and onboard, telling all and sundry. Then I changed my mind! Toddler having none of it. I tried bribery, sweet-talking, toddler sticking with original name, refusing to budge.

So, after a couple of weeks of trying to push the name-change through, I give up. Let toddler have their way.

But I do so wish I'd changed. Origin name troubles me. New badge much better.

What should I do? Too late now (1 month!) right? Toddler in love with baby sibling, switching name bad idea isn't it?

Or would 3 yr old get over it?

Original name - not origin.

New name not badge!

Apologies for post reading as though English not my first language!

Should add, we haven't registered birth yet.

The name should absolutely be your choice and not your DS's. Register the name you like and perhaps use X as the second name - show DS the birth certificate and say "look, the baby's name is YX. The first name is Y and the second name is X". That's it. Then introduce the baby to people as Y. If DS objects, say "that's right, it's YX". He'll soon get the hang of it. Stop talking to him about it as if you do, you are presenting it as a choice. Which it isn't, for him.

It is the parent's responsibility to name a baby, no one else. Your eldest at 3 will adapt.

Call your child what you want.

Three year old will indeed get over it. You won't. Change.

(my eldest wanted to call the new sibling what we had called the bump, and clung to it for weeks after the birth. DD2 would not have approved of going through life as "Fidget" )

TBH my then 3 yo would not have complied. She was, and is the most intractable character you have ever met nothing like her mother then

Anyway, no one can possibly comment until we know the names !

My sister had an influence in my naming. Big sibling rivalry issues (not down to just name obviously), adopted my middle name when I was 7. There were other reasons but I hated the way she would boast about choosing my name. Wouldn't bother me now obviously - but still much prefer my choosen name. I would not let a 3 yr old choose a name however persistent they were.

I would say 'baby's name is x' - however if they wanted to keep calling it y then I would treat it as a nickname which just they use. I know a boy let's call him Harold who in his family was always (for reasons I do not know) called let's say Douggle. All his family called him Doggle, all his siblings called him Douggle, even I called him Douggle. When he started nursery his parents informed him that his name wasn't actually Douggle but Harold and at nursery and then school he would be called Doggle. I'm sure there was a period of adjustment but now he responds to Harold perfectly well, I imagine at home they still call him Douggle but to everyone else he is known as Harold (although poor boy thanks to me now has an additional two names!).

My point is that you should name your child what you any your partner like and always call them that, if toddler persists with other name tell them that is just their name for the baby but everyone else will call the baby x.

I guess thinking about it in psychological terms it felt like a power thing - and she liked any sort of power, I hated being controlled by her. It was as if she owened me because she named me just as she would a doll. My parents never challenged this and used to trot out their cute little story. I changed my name to my middle name which just my parents had chosen. Btw dsis and I get on fine now.

I agree with other posters - change the first name and have the name your toddler likes as the baby's middle name.

100% change the name.

Ha! Apparently I named my sister,a family friend had had a baby recently and I just presumed all babies were called the same. My parents just let me get on with it and makes me feel close to my sister knowing that

You need to use the name you like, not go with your 3 year olds decision.

God, I know. But he'll be all forlorn and "mummy, that's not her name!"

I gave in because I'm a sucker for him.

Everyone will think I'm mad. They'll think I've got PND won't they? The constant flip-flopping!

Just mentioned up DH about changing it again and he was all - no way, not again. So that's two of them I'll be disappointing...

Toddler, shmoddler, change the name. A month is nothing! The three year old will have completely forgotten the old name in two weeks time, he'll be occupied by other other big issues of the day.

Thank you

I've bloody done it. DH not happy. I asked him if he was annoyed. He said no, just disappointed Think that might be worse...

Toddler ok-ish so far. Disputing it but I'm being firm.

So original name that toddler likes or your choice?

This happened with dd2. I went with the name dd1 fixated on. It made her happy and feel involved. It wasn't my 1st choice but it meant something to dd1 and actually I love telling people the story now

My choice Vallium

Oh right

DC1 will get over it. You choose. I regret letting the fact that DC1 had started using name put me off changing DD2's name.

Op I read your last post wrong and thought you had called the baby Valium!!

So - what are the two names???

Arf @naming the baby valium

Haha steppemum I thought the same too, I was like Vallium-surely not lol
I think u have done the right thing by changing to what u want, I think ur 3 year old will adjust fine in a few weeks.
I got congratulated by my DS's teachers the other day on having a baby girl and how it's lovely I will have one of each.... We don't even know the sex of bump!! Teacher said my son had told everyone that he is getting a baby sister and we're calling her 'Tegan'. I just had to laugh. He's made up loads of names for baby and told lots of people, none of the names are actually on our list, we've had Dicken, Meff, Kimmy, Trenor - I think he's just uber excited about baby arriving and I'm sure he'll have his own nickname for them. I think it's a good idea from other posters to let ur son use the name he likes as a nickname as long as like u say he knows baby's actual name

Stick to the original, had DD2 been that three year old she would have remained pissed off forever and baby would have remained her name forever from her.

Honestly if it's a normal name it doesn't matter what your child's called. They become that name and/or the NN they decide on when older.

Said DD2, has a specific shorting of her name and a very specific way of spelling it. Nothing to do with me, it took six months to get my head round spelling it her way.

Now she couldn't be anything else.

Do you let your 3 year old make all your major decisions? I'm guessing not. You are the parent here. Act like one.