In your opinion, can people with names like 'Posy', 'Kitty' or 'Dotty' be taken seriously?

[Stateofgrace]

...I happen to think so, but my family and a few friends disagree. Strongly.

Almost every name I have considered is of the 'cutesy' variety - as well as the above three, I also like Polly, Lola and Nelly. I seem to just like girly names. My mother is fond of telling me ''You are naming a person, not a baby'' as if I am not aware that baby will grow up.

I know that you shouldn't tell people the names before baby is born and present the name as a fait acompli, but I really don't want to pick a name which everyone else seems to hate...

Any thoughts / experiences on this? My mother this morning has just told me that ''she wouldn't trust a Doctor called something ridiculous like Posy'', which is actually one of my favourite names.

Any thoughts/experiences on this?

I agree with your mum really. I don't thing a name like that would necessarily stop your child from having the career they wanted, but it might present an extra hurdle. However much I don't want to, I suspect that I would (in a professional context) make subconscious assumptions about a solicitor called Fifi or Summer or similar, which that person would then have to overcome. That said some of the names you mention are fine - Polly, for example. Frilly girls names, even as shortenings, are just not my thing - I don't really understand why someone would choose one of these over a strong, capable sounding name for their daughter. But plenty do.

I know a Posy in her early 20s. Other than an initial 'oh!' when I fisrt heard her name it doesn't really make a difference. People's names become who they are, not the other way around.

So I now think of Posy as an pretty, creative, intelligent person because that's what she's like.

In the future I can see everybody having a name taken from a short list of bland names and that will truly be awful.

"In the future I can see everybody having a name taken from a short list of bland names and that will truly be awful."

really? Why on earth would that happen?

I have a Bear. It isn't his real name though, it's his "at home" name. Thus far we haven't turned heads in the swing park; equally he has a timeless classic actual name that gets used daily by most of the world.

DM has a birth certificate name but only uses the diminutive. Despite her general disapproval of cutesy names she does wish she had just been given the short form.

Anyway I'm firmly in the "call them what you like, but register them with a plainer name" camp. I think the affection behind a nickname is wasted on the general public.

Curlew everybody would check their dc's name against a list of high court judges names and only use them

Well, that's a pretty grim idea, but if it stops children having Toodles or Cutiepie on their birth certificates..........

One of my bosses is called Posy, she is an amazing Doctor.

Im having a Posy in December!If you like it go for it.

Polly seems to be a very popular name for Guardian journalists

I am 37 with one of the names you mention. I have never thought of it as any sort of barrier (until I just breifly considered it having read your post). One of my bosses in the past couldn't deal with calling me my name so chose a shortened version of it - no idea why. Other than that I've had a successful career thus far and am known in my field by my twee/girlie name and I think it makes me memorable rather than being any sort of hindrance. I have just had a baby myself and have chosen a girlie flower name.....

I think it's a really interesting question as I have a name which can be shortened and I like that I use the formal sounding one until I get to know people then gradually it gets shorter and my family call me the very short version.

But... My mum was called a name and the colloquial version of it is a different name (it's like calling a boy John but knowing him as Jack). She finds this a total pita as noone knows her as the original name but it's on all official things so she will introduce herself but then have to explain at the doctors/airport/whatever oh I mean a different name. It drives her mad and she's talking about (at age 60) changing her name to be done with the hassle.

So by all means have a longer name but if it's not obvious the short form is a derivation of it perhaps think again!

I haven't read the whole thread but 3 words. Cherie. Frickin'. Blair.

Her stupid name hasn't harmed her in the slightest. I really wish people would just go with names they truly love rather than worrying what a load of random people on the internet (half of whom are bigging themselves up in the first place) think.

MN HATES my daughter's name. I don't give a flying fig. It suits her, it's beautiful and she totally rocks it.

Wrt women having no history of jobs -- There is a precedent for women in the bottom jobs or having no jobs, and in those times the cutesy names were very popular. There were Nellies and Elsies and Biddys working as scullery maids and upstairs there were Evies and Pollys and Mollys. I think that's what puts me off about those names - they come from the time when women's names were lost upon marriage, when they became Mrs. James Bloggs, or when a scullery maid was called Biddy but the head housekeeper was called Mrs Brickshithouse even if she wasn't married because marriage made a woman respectable, not her job.

I agree with your mum to be honest. I quite like cute names but Posy (for me personally) is a step too far. Out of the names you listed I think Nelly (or Nell for short) sounds cute but not OTT. You baby though so you choose :)

You're not always safe from bureaucratic hassle even when the shortening is obvious, maggietess! I know a doctor who moved to Australia a few years ago. It took ages to get the visa and his re-registration sorted out and involved presenting all his certificates over and over again. At one point there was a lengthy hold up because some of his certificates were made out to 'Sam Smith' and others to 'Samuel John Smith'. I think he had to get an affidavit sworn that he was Samuel Smith, familiarly known as Sam Smith, before they were accepted. His wife was going through exactly the same procedures but had a much easier time of it, as she was Mary Jones or Mary Elizabeth Jones on everything. It was the abbreviation that threw the spanner in the works.

[Not real names before anybody queries it!]

My previous boss was a Candy. Everyone took her seriously. She was a supervising solicitor.

They're respected once they hold the respected position but the name bias reported upthread means they are less likely to reach that position in the first place.

That may be utterly shitty but it can't be discounted.

Kitty & Dotty are really old names ( short for Katherine & Dorothy ) I really like Kitty. Posy is cute on a baby but a bit embarrassing on a 30 year old, same with Poppy & all the other over the top girly names. Poppy et al. are fine if you end up being a top model or fashion designer, but chancers are you'll end up a slightly overweight ordinary looking shop worker - very few women live up to their cutesy names.

Have you see the Armstrong and Miller sketch about naming babies?

'They're respected once they hold the respected position but the name bias reported upthread means they are less likely to reach that position in the first place'

Horry what is your evidence for this?

It wasn't my post - several pps have talked about name bias in HR departments and at other stages of application and recruitment. I referred to those posts some of which linked to studies and reports.

I am on a phone and too lazy to find the links myself.

Leoand I hate the name Nelly- reminds me of the rhyme ..'Nelly Kelly broke her belly sliding down a lump of jelly'