WWYD?

[Beckett3]

I don't know if this part is relivant but, oh well. Just take note I do love my mum, she can be such a wonderful person at times.

My mum is disabled, doesn't get out much (not at all yet this year), doesn't see many people and as a result has become rather opinionated. You really have to be careful what topics you bring up around her because her opinion is the right one and she won't hear otherwise.

I'm due to have a elcs this Fri, I have no partner (my stbexh walked out on us when I was 3 months pregnant), it's just me and my 3 amazing children. I've tried to involve them in helping to choose the babies name and we now have a shortish list, top of the list is a name I brought up a few months back, a name my mum apparently hates, although I didn't realise how much until today. My poor lovely dad got it in the ear all day yesterday with my mum swearing and shouting which is all he'll tell me because the rest was too bad to repeat apparently about this name that hasn't even been given yet. All fucking day!

I feel like I'm not supposed to be worried about this right now, I'm having a baby in less than 3 days. What do I do? What would you do? BTW it wouldn't have mattered if she found out months ago or after the baby was born, her opinion would be the same and she would make it known. I want to name my baby what I want to name it, but what if my dad continues to get it in the neck, what if she starts in on how awful the name is in front of my other children?

Grrrrrr.

I'm sorry you are having a tough time from your mother, esp at the time you least need it.

IMO your mother had her opportunity to choose names when she had children and now its your child and your turn to choose the name you like.
She simply doesn't have the 'right' to shout out her opinions, so I would not discuss names with her and when she declares her dislike of your chosen name, simply say you like it and don't enter into a debate about it.

Good luck with the impending birth. x

How much less do you like your 2nd choice, would it be only 1% less desirable but lead to family peace?

I agree with both PPs. If you love the name and feel like it's 'the one' then I would just use it and make a stand. Just remind her it's her grandchild she is being awful about and then refuse to entertain the subject further (get up and walk out each time if necessary). Being disabled doesn't give her the right to bully you. On the other hand if the name is one of 2-3+ that you like, then I'd review them all and (providing you won't hanker after the one you don't pick later on) consider a different name, especially if you think she will upset your other DCs when they have enough going on. Oh and don't end up picking the #1 name just because you need to make a point that you won't be bullied. Best wishes for your delivery.

I would choose whichever name I liked best.
She needs to keep her opinions to herself,or prepare to be ignored!
Being disabled doesn't give her the right to be obnoxious and abusive.

I hope your birth goes smoothly and you manage to put her troubles out of your mind and enjoy your new baby.