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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Jess for a boy?

146 replies

OkayHazel · 30/03/2013 02:02

I really like Jess and Jesse, but are there any longer names that these two derive from?

Feel like I just don't know enough about this name!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

seeker · 01/04/2013 12:29

"Anyone with a decent education and/or some experience of the world will know that Jesse is a man's name. "

I agree. Unfortunately, that rules out most 7 year olds.

noddyholder · 01/04/2013 12:33

I really think that considering the views of 7 years olds when you name your child is a very strange concept and luckily most people don't subscribe to their opinions on many things. I certainly don't think the prejudices of others should be a factor in naming a child. Imagine if we brought that into other areas of life

Moominsarehippos · 01/04/2013 12:35

Inner city you'd be fine I guess. We have all sorts of names and no-one bats an eye at them. However, where I grew up, a boy called Jess/Jesse would have the holy crap beaten out of him on a daily basis. The common insult of 'ya big jessy' wouldn't help.

KittenOfDoom · 01/04/2013 12:40

Well said, noddyholder

5eggstremelychocaletymadeggs · 01/04/2013 12:43

My first thought was jess the cat...

But actually i quite like it, i asked my 13 and 10yr old boys and they didnt see the issue. But they know people with all sorts of names.

Our dd has a name that can.be a boys name and we know an older boy with her name, spelt differently but pronounced the same. Again not an issue.

I have noticed on mnet that there is a tendency to think the worsr if children when it comes to teasing/bullying and that given the slightest opportunity and children will tease/pick on each other for no reason. When infact i dont find that to be the case in rl. If anything children are far more accepting than adults.

seeker · 01/04/2013 12:45

"I really think that considering the views of 7 years olds when you name your child is a very strange concept and luckily most people don't subscribe to their opinions on many things"

well,if you're not bothered about possibly making your child's school days harder than they need to be, go for it. Personally, I would rather not put my own desire to use a name over the potential unhappiness of my child. Because being teased can make children unhappy indeed. But each to their own.

MyNewCatIsFab · 01/04/2013 12:50

And sometimes all the planning in the world by the parents can go out the window.......... I know a middle-aged man called Jess. Been known by that all his life by his pals and it's not even his first name but an abbreviation of his surname.

KittenOfDoom · 01/04/2013 12:51

If a child wants to tease another child, they will find something. It's something about the child that makes others want to tease them, and that something is not always obvious.

I do not think that a name automatically leads to teasing, and other posters with experience of the name under discussion bear this out.

VisualiseAHorse · 01/04/2013 12:52

I love Jessica for a girl, and if I was reading out a list of names, and there was a Jesse, I would assume it was a girl, who just preferred that spelling/nickname.

Also, 'ya big jessie' is very common slang round here for being a wuss, as other posters have pointed out.

Having an odd name myself (and growing up in a predominately White British area, surrounded by Sarahs, Michelles and Emmas), and a name that can easily be confused for a boy's name, I would certainly take into account teasing possibility at school.

seeker · 01/04/2013 12:57

"I do not think that a name automatically leads to teasing, and other posters with experience of the name under discussion bear this out."

No. Not automatically. And yes, kids will find something to tease about. But why hand them something on a plate? When it's something so easy not to hand them on a plate? It's just baffling that anyone would choose their desire for a name over a moment's potential unhappiness for their child. Baffling. Even if they were just teased once in their whole life for their name and you could have prevented it why wouldn't you prevent it?

KittenOfDoom · 01/04/2013 13:09

Because you can't prevent it. If kids want to tease another kid, they will. They will find something. The name would not be the reason why they tease. They are like wild animals, they sense weakness.

Bowlersarm · 01/04/2013 13:19

It's a grey area though seeker, the teasing thing. Noddy's DS has never been teased therefore for noddy's son it was a great choice in a name as they (parents and DS) love it. I have a DS called William, and if you take note of MN you would NEVER call a DS William for fear he'll be teased and called 'Willy'. It is such a non problem it's laughable.

I do get what you are saying in that it may give an automatic reason for a bit of teasing, but life may go by without any teasing at all (or at least because of the name)

seeker · 01/04/2013 13:20

So,in repeat, why hand them a reason on a plate? Just to satisfy parental ego?

Don't agree about the wild animals thing, by the way.

seeker · 01/04/2013 13:22

bowlersarm- but you didn't actually call him Willy, did you?

As I said, it may never happen- but why put the opportunity there?

Bowlersarm · 01/04/2013 13:22

Because they love the name. Did you not call your children names you loved?

noddyholder · 01/04/2013 13:26

I have red hair and was never bullied but a lot of people with red hair are. An old school friends life was made hell by it. It was obvious from my friends and my own family that having red hair would be a very distinct possibility. Maybe anyone with a chance of anything which could encourage bullying should think twice about having children So all fat thin ginger etc

Bowlersarm · 01/04/2013 13:26

No we didn't call him Willy but it was a strong possibility he could get called it. In fact he did when he was about 14 (didn't help he had a friend called Richard so they were called Willy and Dick for a couple of weeks!) he laughed about it, shrugged it off and it fizzled out as most teasing does if you don't react. It was a non problem

KittenOfDoom · 01/04/2013 13:28

You miss my point, seeker. A name is not the reason children tease. It may be a handle they use, but almost any name can be subverted for the purpose of teasing.

If kids want to tease another kid, they will. Sad fact is that some children seem to have a metaphorical "kick me" sign on their backs, they will be teased by the crueller ones, but it won't be because of their names.

noddyholder · 01/04/2013 13:30

One of the boys in ds class was bullied in early years he was called Michael and tbh I could never see any reason for some of the others not to like him he was very average nice boy.

CandyCrushed · 01/04/2013 13:30

I originally posted that I thought it was too girly a name but having mulled it over (quiet weekend!) I have decided that I love it as a boys names and that it doesn't sound girly at all.

I would go with the Jesse spelling tough.

noddyholder · 01/04/2013 13:35

I have put a picture of poor jesse on my profile page lovely boy!

Roshbegosh · 01/04/2013 13:36

No don't, like a boy named Sue

BackforGood · 01/04/2013 13:40

Some excellent pposts on here by Seeker, who is being very patient.

Ultimately we are all free to call our children what we want.

Generally (and I now know this OP is an exception) people who are thinking about a name, but not 100% sure come on here to guage honest opinions about what other people think of it. There would be no point in anyone asking if no-one said what they actually think, now would there ?

Lots of people have pointed out, in this case that the name suggested is a name used all over the country to mean 'wuss' / 'wimp' /insert whatever the slang around your way is. It's great, Noddy that your ds has never been teased about his name, and good antedotal opinion for the OP, just as another poster saying they have asked their dc about the name, and they've posted what their dc said, just as others have said if they hear the name Jess / Jessie / Jesse then personally, they would assume it's a girl.
Now, if none of that bothers the OP, then they will still go ahead and use the name. If they think "Why make my dc's life harder than it need be" then they will change it.
Surely, on a 'names' thread, if it's your child's name, then the best thing to do is post your experience and leae the thread - you know with any name someone is asking about some will love it and others hate it, so why sit and read all the posts saying that it's not a great name ?

noddyholder · 01/04/2013 13:44

Thanks for the advice

usualsuspect · 01/04/2013 13:51

Its a great name for a boy.

I love it.

But then I'm not a typical suburban mother

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