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Baby names

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Original poster

please help. everyone hates our boys name and its causing real problems betwenn me and dpa

75 replies

itsybitsy08 · 28/07/2011 11:32

I started a thread a while ago, but now know we are having a boy :)
DP picked Gabriel and although i didnt love it at first, it grew on me and was quite happy to use it.
However, my mam (she was nice about it) is 'really concerned' that he will get picked on.
My brother hates it and really ripped into it, thinking i was joking.
DPs sister hates it also and thinks he will get picked on.
Friends at work think he will get picked on, and have had a very luke-warm reaction from others.
DP is really upset about it all, and it has really put me off using the name, and its causing abit of tension.
I know it is up to us what we can him, but i am worried if that many people think he will get bullied, maybe he will, and is that fair to impose it on him?
Any ideas on other names because i am totally at a loss! (We have a DD lexie)
Really long i know, thanks for reading.

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Kveta · 28/07/2011 12:56

Gabriel (Gabe) is a lovely name.

My DS is called Oliver and my whole family told us (after he was born and named!) what a common name it was, how weak it is as a name, and that we should have used a family name instead. DH and I have ignored them and spent the past 2 years bitching to each other about how ghastly they are. We are much closer to each other as a result :o :o (just kidding about that bit :o).

I'd say ignore your family, or tell them you've decided to name your child something really outlandish (we told our family we wanted an international name, so were deciding between Tito and Butterfly - they stopped asking after a while, and then we hoped Oliver would seem so normal in comparison that they might like it. no such luck, in our case).

TerrysNo2 · 28/07/2011 12:56

I think its lovely name and you should definitely use it. Ignore what anyone else thinks, but it is a lesson not to share names until they are born. People think its fine to say they don't like it before they are born but if you announce it when the baby is born they just have to get used to it!

MrsOzz · 28/07/2011 12:57

If you want opinions, which you do as you have asked: I think it's a terribly poncey, weak name. It does conjure an image of a skinny, ginger child who is always last to be picked for anything.

That said if you like it, use it. You child may grow to resent it as will your family, but they will come around. Next time just don't tell anyone before he is here, that way they will just smile through gritted teeth and say 'Gabriel, how... lovely.'

CinnabarRed · 28/07/2011 13:23

Sadly, some kids just seem to be "bullyable" and some don't. Their name makes no difference at all.

My brother was short, weedy, couldn't do sports, wore glasses and had bucked teeth - he should have been a bully's idea of heaven. But he wasn't. He was the most popular kid in the class. In fact, the teachers had to have a word with the whole class when it emerged that some of his classmates had started sucking their thumbs because they wanted "teeth like David's".

Your DS will be fine.

Mousesmummy · 28/07/2011 13:30

LOL CinnabarRed that is hilarious!

hollyw · 28/07/2011 13:48

If you both like it go for it. People can make nicknames or tease people over any name if they want to. There are so many 'different' names out there these days that I don't think you need to worry. Just love the name you choose and give your child the confidence to be happy with it (or to be confident to say that they want to change it) :-)

ScrambledSmegs · 28/07/2011 13:49

Tell your family you've taken their unhelpful comments on board and you've decided to change your first choice of name.

To Beelzebub. That'll learn 'em Grin

Jodyisagirlsmane · 28/07/2011 13:56

Gabriel is a lovely name, and Gabe / Gib are both good nn as far as I'm concerned.

I am originally from the north east so I can see where you are coming from wr to your families opinions - I doubt my family will think much of what I decide to name my DC as cousins etc have so far all chosen names from the top 10!

On a slight side note, and because it always hits a nerve, I must say why oh why do people think it is okay to make derogatory comments about the colour of peoples hair?? there is NOTHING wrong with being ginger (and as an adult, I personally get a lot of compliments from men who think it is gorgeous, and women who would love to have it.) And whilst I'm at it, blondes are not thick and brunettes are not boring! Gah! (sorry, just really riles me - you wouldn;t make comments like that about peoples skin or eye colour, so why make such stupid, hurtful comments about their hair?)

FantasticDay · 28/07/2011 14:07

I havea Gabriel. He's lovely!

InstantAtom · 28/07/2011 14:43

Gabriel is a very nice name. It's not a girl's name - that would be Gabrielle. Also I can't see a problem with "gay" comments - all that has to be said is that there's nothing wrong with being gay.

muminthemiddle · 28/07/2011 14:48

I disagree mrsoz-Gabriel to me means a blonde, tall, athletic type. That is probably because the 18 year old Gabriel I know fits this description!

MrsOzz · 28/07/2011 14:55

Some names we like, some we don't, we all have opinions and we are all sharing them. We also all have connections to names that we with we didn't!

Muminthemiddle, its great that image is what you associate with the name. I think I need to meet a Gabriel like that! No luck so far which is why I associate it with the three wimpy children I have met (two of which when I was also a child! And the third is a friends child, aged 10 but also very wimpy). Not that I am saying there is anything wrong with being wimpy, or gay, I just would not give my child a name that made me think it.

For the record the gay men I know are actually called, Joe, Matthew, David and Malcolm. Not Gay Gabe in sight!

lizziebennet · 28/07/2011 15:02

Would he get teased? - I'm thinking it depends on where you live. I live in Glasgow, and am 100% convinced that he would get teased here. You say you live in the North East of England, and I'm thinking it would probably be the same there.

ScrambledSmegs · 28/07/2011 15:31

Gabriel/Gabe is what the cool kids are called, right?

There's a short story by Saki called Gabriel-Ernest. It's never spelt out but the Gabriel in question is clearly a devilishly attractive werewolf. I've always thought of Gabriel as having a bit of an edge after reading it.

Not Ernest though Grin.

stressheaderic · 28/07/2011 15:35

I live in Merseyside and don't know of any Gabriel's - I think folk here might have the same reaction as it is perceived as a bit of a wimpy, effeminate name. Sorry, but it is!

MollyMurphy · 28/07/2011 15:54

I don't get why the name Gabriel would cause someone to be picked on - its a perfectly normal and fairly common name.....? (at least where I live).

I think you should tell people to shove it - seriously its very rude to make a negative comment about name selection. I would stop discussing it and just say the you and your DP are going to pick what you like - end of.

chipmonkey · 28/07/2011 15:56

Tall, blond, athletic with a sort of archangel-ish appearance. Can't be bad, really, can it?

MissusO · 28/07/2011 16:50

Tell them you've changed your mind, and you are going to call him Ptolemy or something, then when you introduce them to Gabriel, they'll all be relieved...
Just a thought....

BehindLockNumberNine · 28/07/2011 16:57

Superb name, I honestly honestly love it. Gabriel is a great name, and Gabe is the epitome of cool in my book!

[wishes she had thought of it for ds]

midnightexpress · 28/07/2011 17:00

Love love love it.

Ephiny · 28/07/2011 17:06

I like it. Doesn't sound like a girl's name to me at all, and I can't understand where that idea comes from. Yes there's the girl's name Gabrielle/Gabriela derived from it, but that's the case for lots of names (Danielle, Michaela, Alexandra etc).

I noticed too that it's in the top 100 boys names for 2010. So hardly going to be seen as rare or odd for his generation (or any other really!).

Animol · 28/07/2011 17:07

Never tell people what you want to call your baby before it's born! Some people will always have negative associations with whatever name you choose but when you present your baby and say 'here's baby cheddar' or similar thatn everyone will say 'oh cheddar - how sweet'.
Wish I'd taken my own advice though - fil said 'you can't call a baby that!' when we told him our boys name for dc2 - turned out to be dd - so it was ok but we said never ever tell anyone again!
ps Gabriel is a lovely name :)

hellymelly · 28/07/2011 17:11

My godson is a Gabriel,he is 19 and has never found it a problem,he is called Gabe much of the time. I also knew another Gabriel,who had a brother Raphael and they were ridiculously cool and beautiful and not teased.(would be about 40 now).DH knows a Gabriel in his 60s.Again never a problem.I LOVE the name and would happily use it.

MercyMe · 28/07/2011 17:14

I think it's lovely. If you love it, just go ahead with it, it will grow on everyone else once he's arrived.

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