MiL Nightmare

[Ziggimajiggi]

My father was Danish and Mother is English, and I have a very scandinavian name. My wonderful DH is Scottish from a Scottish family and - surprise surprise - has a very Scottish name.

We're choosing names for our wee baby and DHs mum asked me what we were calling her grandchild. I knew this would probably end badly with such a pinted remark, but I was honest with her about the names both I and DH like.

It was worse than bad...she literally bellowed NOOOO at our favourite boy's name and started talking about how much the little one would be bullied if we gave it pretty much any of the names we have on our list. I was never bullied about my name and uber traditionally named DH was bullied terribly - so I really don't understand!

This was about a month ago, but I can't stop thinking how much she'll hate it when we call the baby one of our slightly less traditional names. DH says it's our baby and our family so we can call it what we want...but I feel this big weight of responsibility.

So...what do you think of our choices?
Boy: Magnus Stephen
Girl: Aurora Astrid

God - don't even enter into a dialogue about with her. The responses 'mm' 'uh huh' and 'anyway.....' come into their own on this one.

It's your choice, and your suggestions are both great. Don't stress it.

Arf at "weapons grade bonkers", will be nicking that for me own purposes

She sounds very rude. I wouldn't discuss names with her any more - if she asks, say you haven't decided yet (which is true, nothing is ever certain at this stage!). And when baby is born, just announce the name.

The bullying thing is such nonsense. I was bullied at school, despite having THE most popular girls name for my year of birth. Plenty of children have less common names and don't get bullied. The way I see it, bullies can always find something to pick on, and if the name isn't an obvious target they'll just use something else.

I like your choices by the way :) Personally would consider Astrid as the first name for a girl, as I really like it, but your way is fine too!

Hi, I have a Magnus and the only nickname he gets at school is 'Magnet' - which he likes as he is very into electricity etc. I have had some negative reactions to the name but so many people out and about have told me that it is an utterly excellent name. I suspect it is a slightly 'marmite' name IYKWIM. He so is a Magnus anyway - any other name just wouldn't have worked! I totally love Astrid btw - if I ever had a daughter it would certainly be a top choice.

gallicgirl - our Danish relatives pronounce it kind of like "Mownus" ("Mow" pronounced like "Cow"). The "g" is almost lost, and the "a" at the start is much more of an "auw" sound. Hard to write phonetically in English as I don't think these are really sounds that we even have!

Cheers for that. Got it.

I did study a little bit of Danish when I went to Copenhagen for the jazz festival a few years ago. It was ridiculously difficult and all the lovely Danes spoke English so well, I was embarrassed to even try a simple hello or thank you.

OP- hope we've convinced you to use the fabulous Magnus.

(practices Magnus with surname just in case....mmmm Magnus)

Lovely names!

I had same with MIL, reacted awfully to my preferred boys name (had a DD so didn't have to decide whether to stuff her or not in the end).

Learn this- in future never ever discuss your truly favouredbaby names in real life until you are announcing the arrival, then people have to be kind!!

Magnus is fabulous. Ignore her. I think I slightly prefer Astrid to Aurora, too but I like all your choices - really, do ignore her.

You have to start seeing it as a family joke. My (Scottish) grandmother used to be the gossip of the family. She couldn't get out much so would sit on her sofa calling family and friends on a kind of rota keeping us all up to date with family news. I realise this sounds awful, but she was the loveliest, loveliest woman, she just loved a chat! Anyway, baby names were her particar favourite gossip and she slated every single name she passed on. Honestly, in the 20 years I was old enough to be part of the gossip chain I never heard her say a single good thing about any name. It became a family joke. We loved her for it. I'm really sad she won't be here to criticise my name choices!

I know your situation is different, but seriously, just laugh at with her: "oh mil, you're so funny. I can't wait till baby's here and you have to call it my choice"

PrincessJenga my Granny is like that, although not Scottsih, she is a geordie. The first thing I asked my Mum after DD was born a few weeks ago was 'What did my Gran say about DD's name?' She only asked if it was after anyone. I'm sure though that she has had worse to say about it.

I also know Norwegian/scots couple with a Magnus. It's not weird in Scotland. I love it and would have loved it for ds4 but ds3 is a fergus and it's too close. We like lachlan - means from the land of the lakes and Viking so that could be appropriate for you but I can imagine what your MIL would think. Personally not loving Aurora but am really loving Astrid. It's beautiful - warrior prince name. Agree Aurora a bit more Disney princess but it's honestly YOUR choice - no one else's

Bloody predictive text - warrior princess - not prince

Lovely choices.

My DS is called Malachy, MIL upon hearing it snapped "what's his middle name". MIL's mother said "just because you read something in a book, doesn't make it good".

MIL now loves it.

Don't discuss it pre baby...although saying that he was Leo when he lived in my belly but when he came out I didn't think he was a Leo.

Ah, lollystix, now-entirely-hypothetical DS2 would have been Fergus . Now I shall turn into a bitter mother/MIL desperately suggesting to any of my children expecting boys "Ooooh, why don't you name him Fergus, that's a lovely name..."

Magnus is a fab name. Ignore her comments!