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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Baby name worry driving me mad

34 replies

olddeuteronomy · 08/03/2011 07:41

My daughter is 2 and when I named her I should probably have noticed her name was about to soar in popularity but was not aware of the need to look for trends in charts as opposed to just the position of the name. Her name is pronounced Isla although spelled slightly differently (for well researched reasons). It is a name I have loved for years, we are Scottish but live in England. I have just had my second dc, a boy and I think a combination of sleep deprivation, hormones and nostalgia for the whole pregnancy/naming experience is making me obsess over her name and wish we had gone for one of my other choices, which were less common (in reality, it was our favourite name at the time and my partner refused to consider alternatives). I am worried this obsession is becoming unhealthy and need someone to put it into perspective - I am just worried she might blame me in future for giving her a v popular name (or she might not care!)
Sorry for long post, would like to know if anyone else has had similar experiences or regretted a name for whatever reason.

OP posts:

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belgo · 08/03/2011 07:44

Isla isn't a common name at all, at least I don;t know of any!

It's a lovely name, you need to stop obsessing. She will not blame you at all.

Janus · 08/03/2011 09:14

Sorry, bit confused, first daughter is Isla, is that right? If so, what is new daughter or is it son, you say boy and then say her but it may be me being bit thick !!
Anyway, we have 3 girls and with each one I think it has taken a little time for them to grow into their name and, believe me, now I couldn't imagine them called anything else, each one suits their name.
We are pregnant with number 4 and the choosing the name thing is driving me nuts this time, like lots but not sure we love any!

Original poster

olddeuteronomy · 08/03/2011 10:17

sorry, baby is a boy, it is my toddler's name currently obsessing me, it did bother me a bit before because of the popularity but not as much - it may be because I did not get to use my girl's name this time (though obviously v pleased with my son!)so now wishing I had used it last time instead if that makes sense (and I accept it is probably irrational!)

OP posts:

BarbieLovesKen · 08/03/2011 11:03

Oh I've been doing this over my daughters name!! (am pregnant too and keep reading repeatedly on here that its the "chaviest" girl's name ever) so I can definately sympatise.

I keep hearing Isla is popular but I dont know where - I have never met or heard of one in my life!! its lovely!

mamsnet · 08/03/2011 11:23

It is your daughter's name now. It is her..

I think it's lovely too..

lovenest · 08/03/2011 12:56

I think Isla is so pretty. I am thinking of changing my DD name @ 11 months as I am not sure! So yes, can def understand the worry thing. There aren't any Islas in our school. I think if you really love a name it doesn't matter if it's mega popular or not. I have a son - Thomas which is v popular but I still love it! Good luck

fifi25 · 08/03/2011 13:37

Ive got a Connie and keep reading on here that its a fat girls name. I have 3 girls, the eldest detests her name which in not very popular where i am. The middle one seems to like hers, i think its about 982nd on the list. My middle daughter has 5 Ellies in her class. Ive never heard of any other Isla where i am. I think people stress about names too much now. When my mam was at school there were 7 Christines in her class and my MIL Susan had 5 other Susans.

Original poster

olddeuteronomy · 08/03/2011 15:32

Thanks, this is making me feel a bit better - mamsnet, you are right it is her name and is therefore her and she does suit it, which is why I feel guilty stressing about it as if I am somehow dissatisfied with an aspect of her. Think it is some kind of post-natal neurosis (I probably need to get out more and spend less time on internet forums obsessing!)

OP posts:

babytrekkie · 08/03/2011 16:01

I don't understand why people are worried if names are too popular!! Isla is a beautiful name for a girl. It's really pretty to say and looks pretty written down. It's quite a calming name.
You chose the name because you loved it at the time and you still do now!!
I'm calling my little girl Elizabeth (due in June) which is popular but I love it so much I don't care!! x

Onion1968 · 08/03/2011 22:15

Isla is NOT a common name except for maybe in the Scottish Highlands. Stop stressing, you liked the name, it is a lovely, elegant non-chavvy timeless name.

Underachieving · 09/03/2011 13:33

I think you're right about it being a sort of really minor post natal neurosis and that you need to get out more. Babies are fantastic but they are low on intellectual stimulation and so if you are the thinking type, who likes complex puzzles to ponder, raising small kids can leave your grey matter with litle to do. It will always find something to do no matter how unstimulating the environment. That is not to say your kids are dull, I expect they are anything but. I think in your case what that grey matter has found to do is to over analyse your Isla's name.

Is your OH supportive? Could he/she be relied upon to take over the childcare a couple of nights a week so you could do a bit of studying? The Open University or your local Adult Education can be the absolute saviour of an analytical/thinking type SAHM.

Original poster

olddeuteronomy · 09/03/2011 15:49

Thanks for advice Underachieving - unfortunately can't really get out for intellectual stimulation at moment due to breastfeeding every 2 hours and have not got baby to take bottle! I think my brain is too tired for genuine intellectual thought, which is probably why have become mired in pointless rumination!

OP posts:

Underachieving · 09/03/2011 15:54

The OU maybe? Just signed up for an Open University course myself this afternoon as having read what I wrote I thought I'd managed to create a fine example of hypocrascy haha.

Read that to mean I am at least equally guilty of not having anything taxing to think about. Or was, I start my new course in May (provided I get fee remission, but they say I should).

PepsiPopcorn · 09/03/2011 16:53

Sounds like you are just really tired OP, understandably! I think it's likely the worries will fade before too long. Look after yourself and don't stress too much!

issy123 · 09/03/2011 20:17

Do you think you might be feeling guilty about your son's arrival and how this may be affecting your daughter so are obsessing on her name. I may be completely wrong sorry if thats the case.

Original poster

olddeuteronomy · 10/03/2011 08:23

I wouldnn't say I feel guilty as such though do sometimes feel I am not giving her enough attention.

I think it is definitely the case the name is not the main issue though, that is just what my brain has chosen to fix on. It does not help that there is another child of the same name in her, quite small, nursery group (ironically no Graces, Rubies or Olivias!) So everytime I drop her off and collect her this really gets to me and I feel sad I did not give her a more individual name.

OP posts:

BikeRunSki · 10/03/2011 08:30

There is nothing wrong with having a popular name. My name is very unusual for my age and I hated it for that reason when I was growing up. My sister's name was very popular in her primary school, but there don't seem to be so many around 30 years later.

For what it is worth, I only know 1 Isla and she is 4.

peterpie · 11/03/2011 08:36

oldd - I could have written your post! I sometimes wonder if I am going mad obsessing about DS2´s name. He is 21 months now and I still don´t "see" him as his name, not only that his name is SO popular where we live its like everybody I see/meet has the same name! It is driving me mad.

The name I had chosen was received very negatively by family on both sides and I caved in. It is a huge regret and I just cannot get beyond it
There´s no way I can change it now, in any case deed poll doesn´t exist here (I am in Spain)

I feel I have let DS2 down by giving him a a name I don´t really like and one that he´ll probably be one of umpteen everywhere he goes.

I know I need to get a grip and should just be thankful for my beautiful, healthy boy

peterpie · 11/03/2011 08:38

Oh and for what it´s worth I think Isla is a beautiful name

Original poster

olddeuteronomy · 11/03/2011 13:46

Peterpie - thanks for your post, I am sorry to hear that. What is the name? I know I need to get a grip too and be thankful I have 2 healthy, beautiful children, and in my case I did choose the name I loved so there is not really a rational reason for that to be any different just because I have encountered a few children with the same name! And we are frequently in situations with lots of children and no other Islas so I need to lose the dysfunctional belief that all little girls are called this!
I hope you do manage to feel better about things, I'm sure he will come to 'be' his name in time.

OP posts:

tigermummy35 · 11/03/2011 18:23

Our niece is called Isla, she's 18 months old. She's the only one we know and it's definitely not chavvy (don't shoot me, but named like Harley, Mitch, Levi, Chardonnay, Whitney, MacKenzie as a first name etc are chavvy, imvho anyway).

Isla is a beautiful and relatively uncommon name in my experience. The only ones I'd heard of before were Isla Sinclair (off the telly in the 70/80's) and Isla Fisher (the actress).

tigermummy35 · 11/03/2011 18:25

Oh, I do know an Ayla, pronounced Isla - the only one I know of those!! I assume her Mum read the Earth's Children Trilogy of books - 'cause that's the first and only place I've seen that name before!

Edmundo · 11/03/2011 18:55

Isla is very popular but that's because it's a nice name. I don't think having a popular name is a negative thing.

LiquoriceLila · 11/03/2011 20:13

Isla really is a beautiful name

RedFlagHag · 11/03/2011 20:23

Stop obssessing! Isla has increased in popularity in recent years, yes, but it is hardly common. It is also a really beautiful name, so relax.

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