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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Thomas or Tom

17 replies

Highlandgirl · 02/03/2011 09:43

DH and I can't agree on Thomas or Tom if it's a boy.

I want Thomas but nn Tom. DH just wants Tom.

DH thinks it's fine to use as a stand only name, like Harry or Ben. And whist I don't really have a problem with it just being Tom..I think it should be Thomas for BC etc etc.

understand that in the grand scheme of things it doesn't really matter as he'll end up being Tom..but I'm fed up...currently 6 days overdue!

Thanks x

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moonbells · 02/03/2011 09:51

I would always go for the full name. DS is quite happy to be any of the permutations of his, though we usually revert to the nn except when telling him off!

I'm beginning to think he should have been a Thomas given his liking for the eponymous tank engine...

christmasmum · 02/03/2011 09:53

I have a Thomas called Tom, I think it sounds better on CVs in the future to have a formal name.

LemonEmmaP · 02/03/2011 09:55

When I was expecting DS2, DH wanted to name him Jamie. I said we should register him as James, but give him Jamie as a nn. However, DH won me round with the argument that if we were going to call him Jamie, then that should be his name, not James. Four years on and I am very glad to have taken DH's advice, as DS2 is very much a Jamie to us, and the name James bears no relation to him at all. In that respect, I would suggest you name your son Tom, as the name Thomas will mean nothing to any of you.

TallulahDoesTheHula · 02/03/2011 09:57

Def Thomas as full name. You can call him Tom all the time and even introduce him/announce his birth as Tom, but when he is older he will appreciate having the full name for things like job applications etc.
Its been shown in studies that people with full names on job applications are more likel to get an interview than those who just put nicknames. Seems more professional I guess (I suppose the interviewer is assuming that 'Vikki' has a full name of Victoria but has chosen/decided to put Vikki on the application, rather than her parents having chosen to call her Vikki on the bc iyswim)

Original poster

Highlandgirl · 02/03/2011 10:01

BC and CV's i totally agree..!

But also I really want it to be Thomas Edward...my maiden name....our last night. It just sounds so lovely!

LemonEmma good to know as Jamie was my suggestion but James was DH...!!!!

OP posts:

Hedwig3 · 02/03/2011 10:03

Tom.

I actually really like Tom but not Thomas at all so they feel like completely differemt names to me.

eastegg · 02/03/2011 10:05

I think the full name is always better, unless you both have absolutely no intention of using it. And Thomas is lovely (guess what DS' name is!). I think your DH should be satisfied that it's likely to end up being Tom as you don't mind it and he'll get it at school anyway, but that it's Thomas officially which gives the child another option as he grows up. Unless your DH really dislikes Thomas, in which case you've got a bit of a problem.

pinkgirlythoughts · 02/03/2011 10:21

My OH is just Tom, and people constantly assume that it's actually Thomas. Most recent example, when we moved house in January and I went to register us for council tax, I gave his name (Tom) to the woman on the desk, watched her write down his name (Tom) on the form as she filled it in, then three days later we receive a letter addressed to 'Mr Thomas Lastname...'

Apparently it's also caused him problems with things like school registers and new teachers while he was growing up, but nothing that couldn't be sorted out relatively easily. Annoying for him, but not major problems!

PepsiPopcorn · 02/03/2011 11:14

Thomas

TrillianAstra · 02/03/2011 11:16

I would always go for full name, then you have choices.

Hatterbox · 02/03/2011 11:54

Go for the full name.

I think that later down the line, a full name is more professional.

Also, my DH has an interesting opinion on this, as he uses his given name (Christopher) for work, but away from work he is only ever Kit (although his mum calls him Christopher when she's angry at him). He says he likes having a different name at work, then what he uses in his own time, as it helps keep the two things very much separate in every way.

Original poster

Highlandgirl · 02/03/2011 13:34

All good points...

Hatterbox I LOVE the name Kit...but not Christopher...so have bin it. As I don't think Kit can be a stand alone now.

I have the same thing at work...full name..and then I have what all my mates / family call me. It's nice to have a home name..

OP posts:

moonbells · 02/03/2011 15:51

One of my colleagues is a James. Throws us occasionally when a friend phones and asks for Jim...

Another reason for going for the full name - they might not actually like the nickname when they grow up, then again they might.

If you give, eg, Jonathan, they can pick Jon, Jo, Nathan, Nat...

Having said that, I loathed my first name so much because people shortened it to something I hated, that I switched to a non-shortenable middle name as a teen and have never wanted to go back!

(Now I get my name made longer [hmmm])

CuppaTeaJanice · 02/03/2011 16:02

I'd choose Tom. Unless there's a nicer long version of it? Thomas is a bit.....erm......sensible brown corduroy slacks, if that makes sense.

lockets · 02/03/2011 16:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Highlandgirl · 02/03/2011 19:25

I quite like corduroy slacks CuppaTea...

In labour now so I guess we'll know soon enough if DC is a Thomas or a Tom...or something total different!!!

OP posts:

exoticfruits · 02/03/2011 19:36

Thomas and call him Tom, he at least has the choice when he is older.(I know a James whose parents called him Jamie until he was old enough to insist on James-sad if he hadn't had the choice)

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