Do other adults decide whether children pick on other children over their name?

[LilQueenie]

We chose our baby names well before hormones took over and really thought it through. By this I mean a year before i conceived. There is one name which is highly unusual but the first girl is getting a fairly commonish name. However several of my partners co workers have said its not fair on her! Am I right in thinking that if an adult starts on about a name then its usually only then the children think its ok to bully a child? Shes not even born yet and I feel like telling them to fuck off. Willow Green is in our opinion a rather normal name. Opinions please.

~I didnt actually ask for an opninion on the name I did however ask for an opinion on whether adults were is some way ifluencing kids on whether they would comment not just on my daughter but any child in general.

I think it makes a difference where you will grow up and where DD will go to school. My husband grew up in a very socially deprived northern mining town in the 80s and he has a name (which I love actually!) but is a bit "poncey" and he was teased mercilessly. I know boys at the school I teach at though in a reasonably affluent area with this name and it is JUST a name! x

Some children will be bullied and some won't. We all hope it won't happen to our child. So most parents will do anything to help their child avoid anything which makes them an obvious target. Giving your child a name which you suspect will invite comment is quite cruel. Especially if it is easily avoided.

I know a few Willows now. It's normal. (buffy has no doubt inspired the amount of willows out there). NO way will she be teased because there'll always be other willows out there.

Willow is a pretty name, but not with the surname Green, IMO.

You didn't make it clear that opinions weren't required on the name. In fact, the way you've worded it looks like you do want them.

I don't know if the adults will influence the children, but if you think they do I wouldn't use the name Willow Green in case you pass on your own defensiveness and attitude to your daughter.

I don't think it matters whether adults influence the children or not. A name like willow green won't be noticed by small children as they won't see the comic value of the two names together. BUT your girl won't be little forever and it won't take long for kids to see the joke! She will have to live with the name until she is an adult and will doubtless encounter a few sniggers along the way.

I don't know weather it is adult influences or not tbh.

Some children do seem to get bullied/picked on more than others. Some kids are very, very vindictive and I personally feel that that is due to upbringing. Even remote, unimportant things such as carrying the "wrong" bag to school can bring out nasty comments from some awful kids.

I agree with the poster who said that children tend to make fun of names which rhyme with rude or silly things. eg smelly Melly, stinky Minky (sorry terrible examples!!!!)

It's not just kids that can be cruel... I was bullied in my first job on leaving college. Those witches would have had a field day with a name like Willow Green... I like it fwiw but living with it could be the pain of your dds life. Deep down I think you know that too.

Muminthemiddle eg bastard Sebastian or I have heard Sebastian called Sirbastard, smelly Ellie, Bart the fart IME almost any name can be used to bully and tease children, another is a girl I know who laughs at a girl in her class called Annabel she calles her baby. If they are going to pick on a person they will IMHO if it is not the name they find something else.

Yes but you can make life easier on your kids can't you? I mean I would never use annabel for the baby reason... It's glaringly obvious to me.

Here's a tip then : don't end your post by giving the name and then saying "opinions please"

"Yes but you can make life easier on your kids can't you? I mean I would never use annabel for the baby reason... It's glaringly obvious to me."

I happen to have an Annabel (aged 9) and she has never, ever been teased about her name. The baby annabell dolls they play with as toddlers really do not have the impact you imagine... if anything she enjoyed having a doll with the same name as her .

What about William - Willy, Smellie Ellie, Benedict - Bendy dick, Silly Tilly, Ravi - Ravioli, etc etc. EVERY NAME can be made fun off if a child wants to!!

Willow Green is actually quite harmless .

Oh dear I have just asked DS1 what he would think of the name of a girl called Willow Green. With no prompting he laughed.

FWIW I think it is OK. Not what I would choose but not as awful as some names I have seen in RL or on here.

Your DD and your choice. Go for it if you want but please don't be rude to people who have offered an opinion that you asked for.

Willow Green is perfectly par for the course round here. My dcs (10 and 8 yo) have just just that it's not a funny name. Then again when one of your classmates is called Bagiratti and another Ariola you tend not to notice what's someone elses'unusual' .

Tammyboy... I do apologise, I posted that totally without thinking and did not mean to offend anyone. I was commenting flippantly at the previous posters comment. Actually when I think about it, it was a totally dumb comment for me to make as I have a dd whose name is a character from a well known cbeebies programme and I do hope she doesn't get teased for this. Apologies again, I hate seeing my kids names being commented on on here, dud not mean to offend.

tammyboy I hope I didn't offend you I picked what I consider to be nice names which I have seen get a good responce on here to illustrate than any name can be used to tease children. This also applies to anyone else who may have got upset by my post. I like all the names I listed and see nothing wrong with them which is why I used them as examples.

Sorry tammytoby

I think that teasing or bullying via a name changes through the ages. I was at school with someone who's surname would have probably had him pilloried 40 years earlier. In the eighties it raised no comment.

I work in a very international environment so names are really never an issue. My DCs go to schools with very mixed groups so again no issue.

In my opinion it is the parents/grandparents who cause the problems. Especially my parents' generation who grew up in the war years and have some very narrow views about names.

It's ok Crawling and Charlieboo - I'm not offended . Maybe my reaction was a little defensive too. At the end of the day almost any name can be teasable - silly schoolchildren have a great imagination .

When I was about 8 - 10 I used to take the bus home from school with a girl called Deirdre, who would be reduced to floods of tears if anyone called her Deedee. Drippy girl, whiny, and never stopped complaining. Her mother would greet her off the bus and if 'Deedee' didn't mention the alleged cruelty of the other children, then the mother would bring up the subject and ask herself if anyone had called her anything but Deirdre.

You don't need either a silly name or silly schoolmates to be teased. And the teasing children can do it without any encouragement from their parents. Ireland in the 70s was full of girls named Deirdre and I can think of no-one who would have laughed and pointed at this particular name.

I'm not standing up for teasing here either. Just wanted to point out that there's more to teasing than children apeing what their parents say.

Yeah, I agree, it's sensing weakness, testing it, and getting a reaction...

My daughter is in that age bracket now MA and she heard recently about a young man called Norman and said to me, Norman is an old man's name! I was surprised. For young children she will accept anyname, but on a 25 year old, she couldn't get to grips with norman. I swear I'd said nothing.... Can she read my mind?

i like it!!! i think its pretty stick with it x