Well that’s me out for next week.. self pity rant

[AliceMcK]

Got a very busy month this month, I don’t usually like busy months but I’ve been doing generally well since got my treatments under control earlier in the year, and I’d been really hoping that I’d finally get to enjoy most pre Christmas celebrations with my DCs. Last few days have been rough, taking maximum pain meds, but yesterday I was able to rest all day and today took it slow and easy. I’ve been extra vigilant with avoiding sick people.

Tonight after watching a battle between an over tired 5 yo and DH, I decided to sneak upstairs switch the electric blanket on and try and let the fog in my head lift. But NO, DH comes up and suddenly announces he’s not well and starts coughing and spluttering in my face. That’s me fucked for our pre Christmas family get together & Santa visit at the weekend. He knows I’m going to be sick now and will take ages to recover. I know he can’t help being sick but he’d usually warn me if he’s not feeling well and avoid getting too close, but he literally coughed right in my face with no warning.

Before anyone says anything about us sleeping in the same bed, I have a Cpap machine and full face mask so I’m not getting full mouthfuls of germs right into my airways.

Dont need any advice, just a self pity rant really and only people who have been where I am can really understand where I’m coming from.

You seem to have decided already you will be sick and ruin Christmas...but you don't know that.
You might not be....can you try thinking more positively and less catatstrophising?

I'm so sorry for you, I know how it feels and it's crap, the effort into keeping yourself well and taking it easy to build up reserves for important things you don't want to miss and actually want to enjoy. If I were you I would do some extra resting, early nights, up the vitamins and healthy food, stay calm, meditate, if the bug does hit I would stay in bed and sleep as much as possible so you can get over it as quickly as possible. Sending solidarity

And I would ignore the first reply you got! You are where you are and it is completely different to someone who isn't where you are coming into contact with viruses/bugs. I think long term with whatever situation you are in, trying to think positively and stay calm does help to emotionally deal with being ill and pain, but you can't just stop feeling as you do when you know the likely outcome of being really unwell, if you are unlucky enough to catch it

You have my sympathies. DH couldn’t even let me have COVID on my own. As a result he hogged the tv to play continuous bloody Xbox, and left me to do the school drop off and pick ups (I only sat in the car which was legal at the time).

Thank you @AuditAngel & @Vinylloving i know full well I will get I’ll as I’ve been here 100s of times. Someone just has to sneeze within the same building and that’s me gone. I’ve got plenty of meds, never ever let them run too low.

I’ve missed so many special occasions with my children, birthdays, Christmas, Santa visits, I’ve actually never taken my youngest to see Santa, DH as always had to do it, which is why I was being so careful and planned lots of rest time so I could make things this year.

Well as predicted I’m full of the lurgi now. Santa Visit today and won’t be going 😢. I did book in 2 Santa visits this year because it’s upsetting I’m always ill for them, one was a charity event so felt able to justify the cost of a 2nd back up date, so fingers crossed I can make the one later in the week. Wider family pre Christmas Christmas dinner also out tomorrow as don’t want to put any older family members at risk, not that I’m expecting any energy to go.

Right now Im led in bed with my iPad and keep glancing at my wardrobe door, as I know just behind it are 5 selection boxs. There were 6 but I’ve already eaten one 😬