Sudden bereavement back home

[Purpleshadows]

Hi everyone. Living in UK but originally from NZ. Had the worst shock of my life last week when I was told my dad passed away suddenly and unexpectedly over there, he was only 55. Understandably mother and brother are distraught as they saw him pass. Life is so cruel, we had been laughing and chatting only a few days prior. Unsure why I’m posting but I know many have gone through this. Please send handholds and hugs and perhaps advice on how to feel human again

I’m sorry for your loss, it must be harder to deal with being so far away from your family. No advice really, grief affects everyone so differently. I hope you have some support here in the U.K. I just wanted to send you some sympathy & hope you will be able to get back to NZ to be with your loved ones soon

I am so sorry. That's....my worst nightmare, and I am not nearly so far away.

I'm sorry for the loss of your father. Do you plan to travel for the funeral and to be with family? My husband didn't but watched the funeral by live stream.

I am so sorry.

My mum unexpectedly passed away 6 months ago. She was in uk but 6 hours away. My brother and dad were at least there.

she developed a cold and pneumonia. Just moved to back to uk an amazing flat and was enjoying settling in beside her grandkids. It was a shock.

she was Admitted into hospital and expected to spend a few days on a ward. I had planned to go down that weekend and was told not to change plans. She suddenly got worse. I got called by the consultant and told to FaceTime her as she was being put in an induced coma for a week. Expected to live. Was told not to travel until she was safe.

3 hours later and she died. My brother FaceTimed me so I could be there when she died. Was surreal and not how I expected it to be. I managed to get there the next day. I had to see her body as I needed to make sure it wasn’t a horrible joke.

it’s hard being human after a shock of losing a parent. My dad is the worst. He is existing and not living. My life has to move on and so does his. It’s hard to support. I can’t get the images out my head of when she died.

it’s a weird feeling 6 months later. I only saw her once a year but talked weekly. It hits you sometimes that I can’t share news. She was my cheerleader. Longest I haven’t spoke to her. First 4 weeks is hard. I had to force myself to go back to work and live. But I had to.

So sorry for your loss, it is everyone’s nightmare when they are on the other side of the world to their family. Can you get back to NZ to be with your family? I think it is hard to accept the reality of loss when it is all at such a distance, especially when it is unexpected.

How terrible, I'm so sorry this has happened. That's far too young.

Your poor Mum and brother. I hope you can find ways to support each other from afar, thank goodness for technology I suppose.

Hugs from Australia X

I'm so sorry. I really sympathise.

My FIL died in the UK during covid so DH couldn't leave Australia. He had to record his eulogy and they screened it in the church which was some comfort to MIL.

We watched the funeral on his laptop. I put candles and flowers around, we dressed as we would've had we been there. Best I could do to honour the occasion for DH.

But it was bloody awful for him and MIL not being together.

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad, he was far too young, and what a shock for you all. I've never been in that situation, just wanted to send some sympathy from a fellow NZer.

What a terrible shock for you, Purpleshadows.
Both my and my late DH's mothers died in the UK after we had moved to Australia. They were of a good age but entirely sudden. And our mums.

So very sorry for your loss. So young.