Seeking Advice on Managing Toddler Tantrums in Public Places

[michalsa90]

I'm struggling with my toddler's frequent tantrums whenever we're out in public, especially in busy places like supermarkets and parks. It seems like any small thing can set them off, and it's becoming increasingly stressful for both of us. I'd love to hear how other mums have handled similar situations. What strategies have worked for you to calm your child down quickly and prevent these outbursts? Any tips on how to stay calm and not get overwhelmed in the moment would also be greatly appreciated!

In the car state your expectations.

We are going in the shop, I expect you to sit nicely in the trolly.

If you are really good we can get a treat.

Dont give them a choice if I’m / out / walk / carried - put them in the trolly.

Keep them engaged - oh we need x can you see it? Well done, not we need Y let’s see if it’s by the bread.

Can you hold X for mummy?

What's triggering the tantrums e.g. in the supermarket can you give them a job (it can be a fake job) like putting things in the trolly? Of they then tantrum because they want to put 10 cans of beans in distract with a snack and strap them in to the trolly. I can remember just picking mine up and taking them outside to finish their tantrum. Give them 2 options. You can put the things Mummy want in the trolly or you have to sit in it....which will it be?

I found giving 2 choices and distracting with a breadstick or mini rice cake worked well to divert before they really got going. If they really went for it just let them lay on the floor and scream or carry them outside if you think overstimulation is the trigger.

Give them a responsibility 'I need you to help with finding bread' 'I need you to help with putting on your shoes'. Or give choices, ;would you like to choose these crisps or these crisps? 'would you like to go on the roundabout or the slide before we get in the car'.

Praising every time they do something right - 'you put your shoes on, well done!' 'you walked nicely - well done'. Lots of positive reactions when they do anything right.

Also, if they need to have a tantrum - as long as you keep them safe, let them! If someone is being judgey, ignore it, if someone comments just nod and smile like you don't speak English 😆You are in their life for about one second, and what they think of you isn't your business.

Good luck!

I tried to make sure supermarket trips weren't at bad times for them as toddlers (eg when tired or hungry). Also I always used to make a game of it (give them things to find, take the receipt,scan the shopping if possible) also give limited choices on some items. If I had just stuck them in a trolley and ignored them they would have acted up out of boredom.
One of mine, the only thing that calmed him down mid tantrum was a tightish hug then we'd just go home and try again another day.