NT 4.5mm - CVS booked - Terrified

[CorkViaDublin]

Hi there
This is my first time to post to any board on any site ever. I’m intimidated because I don’t know the jargon or the short hands. So sorry if it’s very lengthy.

I’m 12 weeks pregnant tomorrow (Friday).
On Sunday last I went for a cycle and experienced some bleeding afterwards. I went to the hospital and they told me my cervix was closed and baby’s heart was strong and baby was very active. My consultant called me in for a scan on Wednesday (yesterday). She was expecting all to be fine because I have had no more bleeding (sometimes old blood on wiping?) but she went very quiet looking at the scan.
The baby is so active, waving and moving but it has this dark shadow lump behind its neck. she explained it’s a NT measurement of 4.5 and that’s very worrying.
We are having a CVS next Tuesday.
I really really really want a baby.
I’m 34 next April and relatively healthy except my periods can be irregular. We tried to get pregnant and were successful on our first month - I should have known it was too good to be true.
Does anyone have experience of this?
Can I ask some questions->
1: have anyone had a NT notch of this size and been on?
2: how painful is the vaginal CVS?
3: how long do people wait for results in Ireland?
4: if we have to terminate- how traumatic is that?
5: how quickly can I try to get pregnant again /when will my period come back?
6: how can I find out if all my pregnancies have this genetic disorder- if that’s what this is.
7: any other information anyone has I would be so so so so grateful. I’m scared and really alone because of these COVID restrictions.
Thank you ❤️❤️❤️

This is what ARC do “ ARC offers non-directive information and support to parents before, during and after antenatal screening; when they are told their baby has an anomaly; when they are making difficult decisions about continuing with or ending a pregnancy, and when they are coping with complex and painful issues after making a decision, including bereavement.”

This is their site

www.arc-uk.org/

I’m so sorry. I’ve been in your shoes and know there’s nothing I can say that will help you at the moment, but I’m thinking of you.

Have any of you had to have surgical termination and Gone on to conceive again, ??
Is it possible
How long does it take?

I have and I conceived no problem when the time came. It was a quick, easy procedure that I recovered from very easily.

I am so sorry to hear of your news OP. Thinking of you, xxx

@Coffeeoverload could I ask you some questions about your termination

Op I hope you are ok. I haven’t had a termination for medical reasons as it turned out my baby had already died, so I had a surgical procedure to complete the miscarriage.

I just wanted to say that Tommy’s midwife helpline supports any woman going through a termination for medical reasons, if you wanted to call them. The ARC charity will do the same and I called them for information when sil was awaiting a termination for medical reasons.

I should have said I mean I hope you are managing ok day to day with some eating and sleeping at this very hard time. I know from personal experience that of course it can’t be ok right now

that’s so hard OP. I’m so sorry.

Thank you all. I’m in Ireland - have tried to contact arc will try again tomorrow

I hope you managed to speak to Arc and that they were helpful.

So here’s how it went- posting for anyone in similar situation and not at all advocating that this is the right thing to do
Where possible go to a safe place and have a TFMR

I didn’t want to travel to the UK because of covid and I wanted to stay with my consultant. But it’s illegal here at my gestation. So I got abortion pills online from women help and they arrived within a few days.

I didn’t tell my doctors what I was doing. I wanted to present as a miscarriage.

I took the mifepristone 4pm Wednesday- no side effects at all. I was told to take the miso 36-48 hours later. But at 4pm Thursday I decided to present to casualty with “cramping”.
They did all the checks and because I’m a private patient they kept me in.
At this point I had received an appointment at NUPAS for TFMR next Saturday week but I’m too scared to travel to another country with covid.

I asked my partner to bring me in the other tablets in a bag now that they were admitting me. He did. At 4:30pm in my own private room, I slipped two misoprostol behind my mask. Cramping happened after two hours. My consultant arrived and examined at 6:30pm and said the neck of my womb was open just a finger tip and she suspected I would miscarry. She talked me thru and gave me heavy pain meds. Pethadine worked brilliantly.

At 7:30 no blood yet so I took two more. Cramping got pretty bad. I was nil by mouth because they were concerned the heart beat would stop and at that point they could legally step in and do a surgical removal.

10:30pm i took 2 more miso and got more pain relief. They didn’t know I was taking the miso

At 1:30 contractions were SO SORE even with the perhadine. I had vomiting and diarrhoea but a nurse rubbed my back and after a short sharp contraction i passed everything.

Bleeding has largely stopped. A few more clots are expected. My doctor arrived at 6:30am to Scan. She found some tissue left in there so she prescribed more misoprostol to empty the womb. It didn’t work and at 3:30 she scanned me again and organised a ECPR for 4:30pm. Woke at 5pm, out of theatre and told I could go home at 8. All over.
It’s not ideal. It’s not the safest way. But for me it allowed me to be under the care of doctors who care for me who wanted to help but were bound by law. Thank you all so much for your support

Oh bless you. I read your other thread and I had no idea of the backstory. I'm glad it went smoothly. Wishing you all the best for the future.

I have just read your thread OP and I'm so sorry you have had to go through this and have the added stress of sneaking in pills to mask as a mc for fear of breaking the law. It shouldn't be this way in this day and age.
I hope you make a speedy recovery and can take some time out to heal both mentally and physically

@weivfgotthis @bitheby
Thank you so much.
It’s been a while saga but luckily it’s over now and we can move on and heal.
I find the sadness comes in waves but it’s more fear about the future and what if that was my only chance etc

Hey
My cvs array has come back and the consultant Just said that it was clear. So does that mean it just had trisomy 21 - and does it mean any further pregnancy would unlikely have the same outcome

@CorkViaDublin
Did you ask your consultant this?
When you get pregnant again they will ask about the outcome of your previous pregnancies and this is taken into account when working out the odds on your combined bloods.
I'm sure your hospital will be able to give you some more information x

I’m currently terrified of my consultant because I’ve been so demanding of her time. I didn’t ask questions.
She said the full genetic array was “clear”. So confusing

@CorkViaDublin
The other cvs array tests for the other 20 pairs of chromosomes which are more rare to have problems it also checks for micro deletions in the chromosomes.
Give them a call next week and ask what you want to know, don't be terrified that's what they're there for x